The Godfather

How clogging your toilet with poop can ruin your day.

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Alright, so today, I wake up and go watch the He Man vs Lion O death battle. I grab a bag of chipotle cheese (I know, sounds gross, but really good) and finish that motherfucker in 5 minutes. 10 minutes later, it happened. I had to take a huge shit and I didn't know it was a huge shit. So, I take a shit and look at what just came out of me. I tried to measure how long but I couldn't do it. I know for sure it was about half the size of my arm. So being the dumbs I am, I flush it. After the fifth time I flushed it, water starts coming out of that motherfucking toilet. Poopy water. So then I turn into Mario and plunge the shit out of that toilet and finally it starts to go down. So, there is one problem done with. Now I have to clean up the poopy water. I grab a couple thousand paper towels and it doesn't work, so I just wait till my mom gets home. When I tell her, she flips her shit. She goes into the bathroom, screams in horror and tells me to wipe the poopy water or ill be grounded. I ask her how. She's like "Not with the god damn paper towels". Then I realized that my IQ dropped to 40. I get a mop and some disinfectant and clean that shit up. After that, my neighbour who lives right under me, complains and says I broke his lamp. I'm like "how?" and he's like "Well, did you clog up the toilet or something?". I'm like sure, and he's like "Wow are you like 4 years old (actual words)" and tells me I have to get him a better lamp, which his cost at around 200 bucks (It was collectors I guess). So kids, don't poop an arm out or your gonna have a bad time.

Comments

  1. Baldy Jr's Avatar
    Your butthole must be as big as Andre the Giant's head.
  2. Poles's Avatar
    Is it bad that I laughed a lot harder at this than I should've?
  3. GonadTheNomad's Avatar
    xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
  4. The Godfather's Avatar
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Is it bad that I laughed a lot harder at this than I should've?
    Nope. I laughed my ass off when I explained it to my mom.
  5. Moonjik's Avatar
    Ewwww.
  6. Lancer's Avatar
    How the hot fudge fuck did you break the lamp by clogging the toilet?