Don't be a filthy casual. Check the message.
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Don't be a filthy casual. Check the message.
Be the obedient subservient slave you are.
You don't have a suitable image, seeing as you are still sitting at your computer, and that would be redundant and retarded.
Spoiler:
http://i.imgur.com/59pl3x4.png
Before you can respond, your father appears in a fit of parently rage! Not only incensed by your refusal to go downstairs, he saw you viewing highly pornographic content! What do you do!?
Cower in fear.
10/10
look him in the eyes and call him a cunt.
Quote:
Originally Posted by King in the North
Can't argue with this.
Going to bed, expect an update tomorrow.
This is better.Quote:
Originally Posted by King in the North
Okie dokie, night.Quote:
Originally Posted by Wumbo
http://i.imgur.com/HB1Dul1.png
You courageously hide in your treasure chest, and call your father a cunt from its cozy confines. Though the insult is muffled through the robust wooden chest, the point is made.
http://i.imgur.com/K3c7ahF.png
Your father pulls you out of the chest, and flips you over for the ass beating of a lifetime. On your birthday, no less! Uh, maybe you should be the other guy.
http://i.imgur.com/Qw7SIkc.png
You're now this guy. What's his deal?
The fact that he's an immortal ten yr old
He's been convicted of bestiality.
((being the only other member of this comic having read Homestuck in its entirety, Wumbo's letting me do my own segments.))
http://i.imgur.com/Qw7SIkc.png
Who is this child? Oh, I know. He was convicted of beastiali...
http://www.court-records.net/rips/bu...i%29holdit.gif
[IO]: Don't even think about it, fucker. Don't fucking do it.
>Mancha: Examine your room
http://i.gyazo.com/a02b7728faf9440717b7b5dd2f05dddc.png
Your name is SALVOS MANCHA, although all your friends call you MANCHA. Holy FUCKING ASSGOBLINS, do you love you some good oldfascistfashioned JUSTICE. Today is NOT YOUR BIRTHDAY, since, you know, it's only a statistical game of chance that it would be, and today it happened to be THOMAS'S. Who the fuck wrote this so it was on his birthday, of all people? Why not yours? This is fucking unacceptable. It's nigh unjust. We might as well just call the fucking lawyers now and bring some fucking justice down on whoever wrote this plot-hole-ridden monstrosity. Destroy. Sue. Banhammer.
The aforementioned OGRELORD is likely one of your FAVORITE INTERNET FRIENDS, at least, well, your favorite friend who likes SHREK. You are not largely a SHREK FAN, although you understand his glory, and instead you follow the morals of the nigh undefeatable PHOENIX WRIGHT, ACE ATTORNEY. Oh, and you like to set things on fire. It's a MOTHERFUCKING MiRaClE that your room is ALMOST UNSCATHED, although part of your DESK'S LEFT EDGE is gone, making it look from this angle like the bookshelf is on top of it. That's not the case. Aside from DABBLING IN PYROMANIA AND JUSTICE, you code shit on your computer.
Your pesterchum handle is infernalObjection and your manner of speaking tends to usually follow normal grammatical conventions. However, there are several eXceptions, and these seem to come down to the fact that there are several letters of the alphabet that are eQually unused, so you capitaliZe them.
Your BEST FRIEND went to go check another message but he's likely GETTING HIS ASS WHOOPED BY HIS DAD, you know how he is. So you're going to have to find something else to keep you busy in the moment. Your SECOND LAPTOP is behind you, the one that you usually run programs on while you PESTERCHUM and PLAY VIDEO GAMES on the one sitting on the desk. Although, your second, wireless, mouse might be missing, so FUCK THIS RIGHT IN THE PUSSY.
Entertain yourself. What the FLYING FUCK are you going to do, ASSHOLE?
Sorry. Still mad about the injustice.
What do you do in the meantime?
Play video games.
masterbate
Masturbate to that pornographic picture I sent Wumbo while playing video games.
Specifics are always betterQuote:
Originally Posted by King in the North
>Play some video games
http://i.imgur.com/7kwOMWz.png
Might as well, it's probably the best option as of now. Might as well play some of that sexually enticing Super Smash Flash 2.
You kicked that plumber's ass. HAHAHAHAAHAHAHA.
Oh, it appears you have gotten a message-- the ERBoH.com chatbox was recently updated to integrate Pesterchum and group settings, so you're in a group with THOMAS and two other friends, EOIN and SAMBAH.
Spoiler:
Seeing as there are likely two butthurt individuals in this land now, it'd be prudent to see how they're faring after yet another kick from the conversation.
Who would you like to be?
Sambamamamabababimbomamababimamibamimabi pls
==> Ignore readers
You decide to be Sam-- FUCK the readers! You really think you'd have so much power over such an important decision? Have you gone mad?!
==> Enter name
http://i.imgur.com/1HiRrQ5.png
Having used the same joke twice, you decide to spruce things up.
Your name is EOIN KEARNY. You are QUITE POSSIBLY the MOST HANDSOME and SMARTEST, and you are MOST DEFINITELY NOT another sprite to be used in a LONG-WINDED ANIMATION, SO STOP ASKING. You have many INTERESTS. Such INTERESTS include BRAZILIAN FUTBOL, PIXAR MOVIES, MANLY SCOTTISH ROGUES, and ICE PRINCESSES.
Your Pesterchum handle is dancingManiac, and you are quite prudent to remind others to check their privilege, cis scum. You have just been kicked from a Group Pestersession, along with the Jew. You suppose you could just log back in, but you have other matters to attend to first.
What matters are you tending to?
Eating haggis
Masturbating to EpicLLOYDS portrayal of William Wallace
==> Eat haggis
http://i.imgur.com/4BWXiVs.png
You have no idea why you have haggis, but you remember you have some Captchalogued for some reason, and you suddenly crave it.
==>
http://i.imgur.com/pMUpA03.png
Unfortunately your FROZEN FETCH-MODUS makes it so you have to wait for your card to that before accessing it.
==> Wait.
http://i.imgur.com/Sk5kUXZ.png
Your card finally thaws and-- Wait. Is that a sheep's lung? stuffed with mysterious meats?! Why did you crave that? Why did you even have that in the first place?
==> Fondly regard Scottish rogue.
http://i.imgur.com/zE2ma4Z.png
You gaze upon your SCOTTISH ROGUE poster. You do not know why it fills you with so much FREEDOM, and you do not even know who that man is. Nevertheless, you find his glare... smoldering.
==> Go back on computer.
http://i.imgur.com/C3gi6KW.png
You figure you gave Mancha enough time to cool off. You log back on to Pesterchum, only to see more people have logged in since you were kicked.
Spoiler:
You do not want to play the waiting game. You decide to be someone else. Who are you now?
Be the big dick mystic.
Be meeee
We wanna be Drew Bresus.
==> Author: Flip out.
http://i.imgur.com/60azVZV.png
THREE different answers? Really? I mean I should have expected that but how am I supposed to portray THREE flighty broads at the same time? First come, first serve policy, bitches.
http://i.imgur.com/DlG7kWC.png
And God DAMN these Cosmic Horrors from beyond the Veil! All I want to do is write in my laboratory, which is most certainly not a stock photo. Anyway, stop looking at me, go stare out the pubescent girl, please.
==> Stare at pubescent girl.
http://i.imgur.com/qINoAaw.png
You are now staring at the pubescent girl, who is you. Your name is STAR LORDEY, and SWEET JEHOVAH do you LOVE FLOWERS. However, you are not currently in your ROOM, making this narration harder to NARRATE.
==> Go to room.
http://i.imgur.com/4CHJv4f.png
You are now in your ROOM, which allows us to continue on with the NARRATION. You have a KEENESS for STUFFED ANIMALS AND PUPPETS, as well as JAPANESE POSTERS. You enjoy bright colors, seeing as they RELAX you. PARADOXICALLY, you have a corner dedicated to POSTERS OF ANGRY PEOPLE. They soothe you and whisper sweet nothings to you while you sleep. I'm sure that has no bearing on the future plot of this story.
Your Pesterchum handle is bigdickMystic , though you are quite obviously not a MAN, and you keep yourself censored for the kids, but GOSH FLUFFIN' DANGIT, you just get so excited sometimes!
You are currently awaiting two of your friends to come online. What do you do?
(Author's Note: This is where I'm stopping for today.)
Eat a crab.