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  • Nicolas Cage

    4 57.14%
  • Marshall Mathers

    3 42.86%
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Thread: Terrible Joke Battles of Meh

  1. #141
    Clemi's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
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    Aw i missed that one

  2. #142
    GonadTheNomad's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
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    Not enough me.

    In the writing process, that is.
    Spoiler: 

    Act uqa wa it
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by “Adonis”
    Act
    uqa
    wa
    it
    Gonad has no nads pass it on!!!!11!

  3. #143
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
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    Maryland, United States
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    Blog Entries
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    If you want me to review something of yours, click me.
    Spoiler: 


    We're all humans, we all make mistakes, but try to always keep the site rules in mind..

    Things on here I found funny:
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambama
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    wumbo write anotherfanfic now
    have nice peter come in
    "it's nice peter bitches"
    ""and i'm going to give you all my NICE PETER"
    and then peter visits the forum
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by zyroda View Post
    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
    Quote Originally Posted by TDFE Confessional
    Quote Originally Posted by GonadtheNomad
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    SENT
    lies
    i never lie
    Honest Wumbabe
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperRapz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocket
    Gogos are not 4 year old toys, they're a choking hazard.
    You Know What Else Is A Choking Hazard? My Penis. So you Better Stop Sucking On it So hard, Four Year Old. Make A New Thread For your Spam, You Stupid Bitch. We Try To have Fun Here. And Don't Jump On me About MLP, You Stupid little Fuck. Like YN Said, Go Get Tested Or Some Shit. I'm Tired Of Putting Up With You. Pie Licking Bitch, Go Shove A Pickle up Your Ass. Better Yet, A Banana.
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambaba
    http://aattp.org/conservative-christian-rewrote-harry-potter-so-her-kids-wont-turn-into-witches/
    I'm not reading past the title

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Luther King, Jr.
    Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.

  4. #144
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Location
    Know Your Role Boulevard
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    48
    Cover - http://i.imgur.com/uf05LGJ.jpg

    Writers -
    Tomahawk
    Sambama
    Gunnut
    PolarBore

    Spoiler: 

    TERRIBLE JOKE BATTLES OF MEH
    HAN SOLO
    VERSUS
    CARLOS SAGAAAAAN
    BEGIN!


    Carlos Sagan -

    You wanna mess with me, Senor Hanny?
    I'm about to bake tortillas from scratch like, uh, me!
    Hombre, you make me sick, and you look like a Jew
    Y yo abuso Leia cuando yo rap against tú (SWISH)
    ¿Qué se siente knowing you'll lose?
    Even Luke Skywalker ees a rapper (mejor que túuuuuuuuu)
    Chico I'll school you in science like my name was @Bill_Nye_Tho__
    And I bet you shoot first in bed, you vast ho
    Mis raps son mas caliente que Venus
    De universe es muy grande, just like mi penis


    Han Solo -

    A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away
    There was a Mexican Jew who happened to be GAAAAAAAAAY
    I'd say don't get cocky kid, but you fuck enchaladas
    And the only science I know is the biology of your mama
    I'm tired of hearing that weird-ass Spanglish de tu
    I'll outdo you like that boulder, and the nazis too!
    Wait, wrong movie. Never mind
    My flagpole can flip over a bike
    I wrecked all of your Cos-hoes with my Millenium Falcon
    How bout I call up CPS about them kids on your lap, man


    Carlos Sagan -

    Why don't you crawl back into that carbonite shit
    It is scientifically proven: you can't diss a dude without the wit!
    Come back when you and your crew hablan espanol
    Mis raps are like a boulder, porque they're on a roll
    They're also so awesome, nosostros Mexicanos no have word for it
    Voy run you over like a lawnmover, tu lil shit
    Well Han, I see you're flying Solo
    Y con that Wookie next to you, you won't get any fine cholos
    Chewbacca: GRRRRRRAARRRR
    Carlos: Chewfacca you


    Han Solo -

    I know
    You blow
    Luke Skywalker: OOOOOOOOOHHHH

    *Somebody flies in on rocket crutches*
    Announcer: It's... IT'S... IT'S WALT JRRRRRRRRRRR

    Walt Jr. -

    W-why don't you two j-j-just fucking DIE already
    M-m--m-me w-winning this battle is just basic c-c-c-chemistry
    Y-you're from Mexico? w-we're newer!
    B-but I bet y-y-you're more JEWER
    I'm so dope, I-I don't n-need to rap f-fast
    I-I-I'll j-just, like, g-g-gobble up your d-disses like b-b-breakfast
    C-call me Mike Shanahan b-b-because I have palsy
    I'm n-not H-Heisenberg, but i'm pretty ballsy
    ill m-m-m-urder you l-like someone that dies
    At some point in season 5
    *Walt Jr looks through screen at The Governor*
    S-spoilers
    The Governor from TWD: wtf is this shit
    Walt Jr: N-N-No not you
    Sparts: I HAVE NO INTERNET FOR A MONTH
    Walt Jr: I-I-I d-don't c-c-care, d-d-d-d-bitch!
    *Walt Jr pulls out gatling gun crutches, shoots the living shit out of everyone, and listens to some Scatman John*


  5. #145
    GonadTheNomad's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
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    WA, USA
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    11/10 los tears
    Spoiler: 

    Act uqa wa it
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by “Adonis”
    Act
    uqa
    wa
    it
    Gonad has no nads pass it on!!!!11!

  6. #146
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Maryland, United States
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    7,162
    Blog Entries
    32
    It's hard to imagine that this is all one battle.

    If you want me to review something of yours, click me.
    Spoiler: 


    We're all humans, we all make mistakes, but try to always keep the site rules in mind..

    Things on here I found funny:
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambama
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    wumbo write anotherfanfic now
    have nice peter come in
    "it's nice peter bitches"
    ""and i'm going to give you all my NICE PETER"
    and then peter visits the forum
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by zyroda View Post
    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
    Quote Originally Posted by TDFE Confessional
    Quote Originally Posted by GonadtheNomad
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    SENT
    lies
    i never lie
    Honest Wumbabe
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperRapz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocket
    Gogos are not 4 year old toys, they're a choking hazard.
    You Know What Else Is A Choking Hazard? My Penis. So you Better Stop Sucking On it So hard, Four Year Old. Make A New Thread For your Spam, You Stupid Bitch. We Try To have Fun Here. And Don't Jump On me About MLP, You Stupid little Fuck. Like YN Said, Go Get Tested Or Some Shit. I'm Tired Of Putting Up With You. Pie Licking Bitch, Go Shove A Pickle up Your Ass. Better Yet, A Banana.
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambaba
    http://aattp.org/conservative-christian-rewrote-harry-potter-so-her-kids-wont-turn-into-witches/
    I'm not reading past the title

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Luther King, Jr.
    Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.

  7. #147
    GonadTheNomad's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
    Join Date
    Feb 2013
    Location
    WA, USA
    Posts
    4,916
    Blog Entries
    161
    Not sure if I ever did this, but here's the old Vocaroo links to the audios I've made.

    Thicke vs Fat Al
    http://vocaroo.com/i/s0Um08exFpCU

    Scientist vs Blackbeard
    http://vocaroo.com/i/s0z3zCFyvzXs
    Spoiler: 

    Act uqa wa it
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by “Adonis”
    Act
    uqa
    wa
    it
    Gonad has no nads pass it on!!!!11!

  8. #148
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Maryland, United States
    Posts
    7,162
    Blog Entries
    32

    If you want me to review something of yours, click me.
    Spoiler: 


    We're all humans, we all make mistakes, but try to always keep the site rules in mind..

    Things on here I found funny:
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambama
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    wumbo write anotherfanfic now
    have nice peter come in
    "it's nice peter bitches"
    ""and i'm going to give you all my NICE PETER"
    and then peter visits the forum
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by zyroda View Post
    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
    Quote Originally Posted by TDFE Confessional
    Quote Originally Posted by GonadtheNomad
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    SENT
    lies
    i never lie
    Honest Wumbabe
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperRapz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocket
    Gogos are not 4 year old toys, they're a choking hazard.
    You Know What Else Is A Choking Hazard? My Penis. So you Better Stop Sucking On it So hard, Four Year Old. Make A New Thread For your Spam, You Stupid Bitch. We Try To have Fun Here. And Don't Jump On me About MLP, You Stupid little Fuck. Like YN Said, Go Get Tested Or Some Shit. I'm Tired Of Putting Up With You. Pie Licking Bitch, Go Shove A Pickle up Your Ass. Better Yet, A Banana.
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambaba
    http://aattp.org/conservative-christian-rewrote-harry-potter-so-her-kids-wont-turn-into-witches/
    I'm not reading past the title

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Luther King, Jr.
    Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.

  9. #149
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2012
    Location
    Know Your Role Boulevard
    Posts
    6,814
    Blog Entries
    48
    420 praise it jews

    Cover - http://i.imgur.com/NYa5zx0.jpg

    Writers -
    SPECIAL GUEST MeNCHA
    SPECIAL GUEST NOREMAC TOO
    Sambama
    Tomahawk
    PolarBore


    Spoiler: 

    TERRIBLE JOKE BATTLES OF MEH
    HITLER
    VS
    JESUS
    VS
    BOB MARLEY
    BEGIN


    Hitler -

    It very much pleases me to say,
    That our Lord and Savior Christ has risen on this day

    Jesus -

    I'm Jewish

    Hitler -

    o
    Now that I know you're a jew I'm gonna kill you fast
    I'll kill you like a nazi killing jews with gas
    The only power you had was walking on water
    Mary ain't a virgin, you see, cuz I AM YOUR FATHER

    Jesus -

    Now I may be a Jew, but at least I'm not a JEW
    Even Tomahawk is a better (FACIST THAN YOU)
    *DaveCreator nods in solemn approval*

    Bob Marley -

    I'll be watching jesus while he praise it
    but hanging with buds while i blaze it

    Hitler -

    Bob Marley, I'm a busy man, I'll make this snappy
    Don't worry be Happy? More like don't worry be FAPPY

    Bob Marley -

    I didn't write that mon

    Hitler -

    o

    Jesus -

    burned
    Like my people
    suck my chalice
    and then get impaled by a church steeple

    *Jesus ascends into heaven, Hitler shoots himself and Bob Marley dies after injecting 5 whole marijuanas*

    It's....It's....LARA CROFT

    Lara Croft:

    You all are gay
    fight the patriarchy

    who won yeah yeah
    terrible joke battles and shit

  10. #150
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    Maryland, United States
    Posts
    7,162
    Blog Entries
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    We should do battles like this more often.

    If you want me to review something of yours, click me.
    Spoiler: 


    We're all humans, we all make mistakes, but try to always keep the site rules in mind..

    Things on here I found funny:
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambama
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    wumbo write anotherfanfic now
    have nice peter come in
    "it's nice peter bitches"
    ""and i'm going to give you all my NICE PETER"
    and then peter visits the forum
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by zyroda View Post
    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
    Quote Originally Posted by TDFE Confessional
    Quote Originally Posted by GonadtheNomad
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    SENT
    lies
    i never lie
    Honest Wumbabe
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperRapz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocket
    Gogos are not 4 year old toys, they're a choking hazard.
    You Know What Else Is A Choking Hazard? My Penis. So you Better Stop Sucking On it So hard, Four Year Old. Make A New Thread For your Spam, You Stupid Bitch. We Try To have Fun Here. And Don't Jump On me About MLP, You Stupid little Fuck. Like YN Said, Go Get Tested Or Some Shit. I'm Tired Of Putting Up With You. Pie Licking Bitch, Go Shove A Pickle up Your Ass. Better Yet, A Banana.
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambaba
    http://aattp.org/conservative-christian-rewrote-harry-potter-so-her-kids-wont-turn-into-witches/
    I'm not reading past the title

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Luther King, Jr.
    Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.

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