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  • Nicolas Cage

    4 57.14%
  • Marshall Mathers

    3 42.86%
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Thread: Terrible Joke Battles of Meh

  1. #191
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    WRITERS:
    PolarBore
    Sambama
    Wario-Gal
    MaNCHA
    Lohuydahutt

    Cover - http://i.gyazo.com/e422f25f1e34b9d9d8f00f429cab6430.png

    Spoiler: 

    epcirap blpateles
    mthbysterrs
    versys
    goste bysters
    versus
    HITLA’S GOOOOSTE
    beagan


    Mythbusters:
    Interesting, we gon bust up yo mama's pussy
    Ghostbusters are more like noastrusters wussies
    Jamie n Adam r the science myth guys. Your winning is a myth
    Buster is afraid you'll **** him but I don't give a shig
    There was a time when we had an episode about ducks
    Why? Because your hats make you look like you suck.
    Something something explosions want more?
    when in doubt my raps blow u up liek c4


    Ghostbusters:
    Is that stay puft? Or say what Cuz you suck
    You look like slimer made a poop that made love to a walrus truck
    I am the gate keeper so keep it to yourself saaaaaaaaannnnnn
    Because we bust a nut & some rhymes in ye mum's bum
    look at me bootie talk to me bootie
    lick up me bootie slurp up me bootie
    If there’s something strange in the neighborhood, you stupid Bs
    You should probably call the police.


    Hitler’s Ghost:
    I am Adolfo hitter not the bitch Rossilini
    I see the Jews' lives and fuck it right in the pussy
    I led the nazis but I did nazi ghostbusters the movie one or two
    Adam is more like Saddam but Jamie is Kevin James' walrus poo! Ooo
    Suck on the one German nut that ruled over European people
    You think. You know mean but my dictator farts are evil like your sequel
    Come at me busters because I know you can't win
    It's like little einsteins mixed with Luigi's mansion (ooo kill em)
    Hashtag hot like an oven that rides like a train
    I'll show ghost rider your women he'll show them his pain-us
    i will bust the myth that the busters arent gay butts
    i preferred that guy rick moranis played ye sluts


    Kari, Tori, and Grant:
    you can fly but can you even rap
    you can watch but can you even fap
    we may be buster but we dont lie on the internet
    but we did bust ur girl’s myth #rekt


    Stay Puft Marshmallow Man:
    I stay puft, you stay SUCK...t
    I’ll crash into you with my car, I mean TRUCK...t
    Here’s a bag of dicks, no one gives a shit
    You dont wear a bra cuz you dont even have any tits!


    Hitler Gostie
    … bloop.
    Winston Zeddemore is one of the Ghostbusters. He busts ghost.
    Randy Savage is one of the Mythbusters. He eat dick.
    But now I’m back from the dead and I’m after your head
    I Nutbusted all your wife last night in the bed!
    zuul? more like jewl
    your face looks like a cube so what the hell do you do
    So screw you, you big black cunts!
    Being by your side is like bunnies bubbles gumdrops!


    Lara Croft:
    Fight the patriarchy
    Do it todaychriarchy
    You’re all gaytriatchy
    heyeyeyetriarchy


    jokes.
    Last edited by Poles; 10-02-2014 at 09:43 PM.

  2. #192
    Spars's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
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    Wesker vs Doom reference FTW

    Goste Hitla won


    Spoiler: 






    Thanks peeps <3333

  3. #193
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    halloween special spoopy

    Cover - http://i.imgur.com/pWfsEGT.png

    Writers -
    PolarBore
    Sambaba
    Spartica4Real
    Lohuydahutt
    Darling
    Gunnut wrote a line or two too.

    Spoiler: 

    EPIC RAP BATTLES OF TERRIFYINGPLASTER
    MARIO
    VS
    SANIC.EXE
    BEGAN

    MARIO -

    TRY AND FIND ME you stupid JEW
    point of advice I HATE YOU
    011001110110
    000101111001
    theres no way out of here get back in your egg mobile FLY AWAY
    And it’s a scientifically proven fact that some hedgehogs are GAY
    your story’s more unoriginal than a CREEYPASTA ROYALE
    And I bet you go FAST whenever you’re with a GAL
    After I beat you I’ll leave HYPER REALISTIC BLOOD all over the place
    ...I’ll just make this FACE


    SANIC.EXE -

    In my opinion you’re Italian, I should call you Luigi
    And you should clean up that blood, I’ll call you Squeegee
    I noticed out of my peripheral vision that a fat ass had arrived
    After this rap you will be buried alive
    Everyone knows Genesis does what Nintendon’t
    If you think you’ll beat me well guess what you won’t
    Kyle’s a jew, just like you
    He gave you a letter because I’m 2fast 4 jews


    *MARIO takes off hat and it turns out he is actually RON JEREMY IN DISGUISE*


    Ron Jeremy -

    In my opinion you have fur, I should call you a furry!
    Why do you always run like you’re in a hurry?
    Your face is something I now consider horrifying
    And I saw your mum, she’s whore-ifying
    “You’ll beat me” -Sonic.exe 2014
    pewdiepie played you in the worst video i’ve ever SEEEEEEEEEN
    Just so you know the Call of Duty™ is a pretty cool game I’d say
    rhymes so hard call me creepy al dente


    *After Ron Jeremy’s verse, Freddy Fazbear comes out of nowhere, kills Sanic.exe, and hyper realistic blood flies everywhere*


    Freddy FΔzbear -

    Buy gold...en Freddy.


    Ron Jeremy -

    In my opinion you’re Freddy, I should call you the iCarly kid!
    The bite of 87? You can bite my 87 foot dick (ooo)
    In my opinion you’re a pen, welcome to PENISLAND
    Ooops, I forgot that the space bar existed man


    Bonnie -

    How you gonna battle I invented hip hoppin’
    My little tail swingin’ and my big dick floppin’
    Soon I will be in a rap battle with some douche named Clyde
    all i did in life was make sambaba DIEEEEEEEEE… d


    Ron Jeremy -

    In my opinion you’re a bunny, I should call it a slight Bugs problem!
    You done messed with the wrong Ron-ham
    In my opinion you’re a Chuck E. Cheese ripoff, I should call you Lu-cheesy!
    (AH) Just take a lesson from Jeremyzy


    Chica -

    Nice dick, DORK, you look like a duck
    I had Sam watch Super Hornio Brothers, he told me it sucks
    I’m actually a chicken not a duck but NOBODY CALLS ME CHICKEN
    *guitar solo*


    Ron Jeremy -

    In my opinion you’re a duck, I should call you Umbreon!
    If you keep staring through the window you will get peed on
    In my opinion you’re a DUCK, I should call you Jirachibi!
    If you want the D just say it, stop dancing me


    Foxy -

    swiggity swooty I'm coming for that booty (heyyy)
    swiggity swooty I'm coming for that booty (heyyy)
    swiggity swooty I'm coming for that booty (heyyy)
    swiggity swooty I'm coming for that booty (heyyy)
    get it.
    im a pirate.
    ahahaha.
    fucking get it.


    Ron Jeremy -

    In my opinion you’re a fox, so what does the fox say?
    Well, fox you too, kid, I hope you have a very bad day!
    In my opinion you’re a pirate, I should do you vs a scientist!
    Call me Ron Jere-pee, because I’m getting pissed!


    *Freddy takes off mask to reveal that he is actually FOZZIE BEAR IN DISGUISE*


    Fozzie Bear -

    Wocka Wocka Wocka
    Flocka Flocka Flocka
    I’m a stand up comic, so I’ll stand up to you
    When you do fellatio, it makes your face look like POO
    Call me The Fuzz-ie Bear because I won’t let you get away
    I’m so cool you can call me fonzie bear EYYY
    I’ll break your walls down like my name was Fozzy
    Jumpscare your ass like dem peeps be jumping on your cock-zee


    Statler -
    Wow, that verse had a lot of name puns.
    Waldorf -
    Yeah, well I couldn’t NAME a single one I liked!
    Statler and Waldorf -
    NUHUHUHUHUH


    Ron Jeremy -

    In my opinion you’re a BEAR I should call you Pooh
    Now go rap against pee like you’re supposed to do
    In my opinion you’re a BORE but your rhymes arent Polar cold
    In my opinion the in my opinion jokes will never get old
    In my opinion you’re a BEAR I should call you the Kung Fu Panda Po
    Even though it’s somewhat debatable about whether that’s a bear… yo.
    I would wish you were a raccoon but I don’t really care
    stare
    at my dick hair


    *Fozzie Bear takes off mask to reveal that he is actually PHONE GUY IN DISGUISE*


    Phone Guy -

    *evil laugh*
    Let’s just get down to it.
    Hello, hello? I’m going to beat you up now, I guess.
    Your dick’s a, uh... 100th the size of a magic wand, you couldn’t even beat... Spain?
    You like pizza? Wow, same.
    I’d eat you alive,
    Last edited by Poles; 10-26-2014 at 11:29 AM.

  4. #194
    FIRST

    Chica wins with "you look like a duck"

    I like Ron Jeremy's lines though
    Am I forgetting something? PM me a reminder!

  5. #195
    YellowNerd's Avatar More Blonde in your Movie
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    I agree, Chika owns but of course, Freddy is best, but phoneguy is liek god.
    Last edited by YellowNerd; 10-26-2014 at 12:10 PM.

  6. #196
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    Cover - http://i.imgur.com/8RwZmcF.png

    Writers -
    Wumbo
    Mancha
    YellowNerd’s Dick
    PolarBore
    Sambama
    Lohuydahutt

    Spoiler: 

    turbil juk bals of walter white’s sell thing
    BUFFALO BILL AND ELSA
    VERSACE
    THE BITCH AND CAESAAAAAAAAAAAAR
    BEGONE


    The Bitch and Caesar -


    The Bitch: Try to entrap me with your lies and accusations
    Caesar: Fuck you bitch, I’m the freak of the nation!
    The Bitch: Here’s a bag of dicks no one gives a shit
    Caesar: Go and run your moth, take a knife to your clit
    The Bitch: In my opinion you’re a bitch, I should call you myself!
    Caesar: I was the leader of Rome I think…? I’m on the higher shelf
    To denounce the evil of truth and love
    The Bitch: to extend our memes to the stars above
    Caesar: jessie
    The Bitch: james
    wait fuck uh
    uh
    yeah
    I fucked your mother bitch bitch don’t kill my vibe
    After this rap, you will be buried alive
    Nice hat dork, you look like an Umbreon
    You guys look like ducks but I don’t give a cluck
    Both: It’s a scientifically proven fact that you…

    ....



    suck.


    Buffalo Bill and Elsa -

    Buffalo Bill: would you fuck me?
    Caesar: no
    Buffalo Bill: i’d fuck me
    gonna smash this duck like his name was umby
    it puts the lotion on its skin
    or i’ll give your mom the hose again
    It tosses the salad, it stops whining like a bitch
    i had your girl over last night, her ass is what i licked
    Coincidentally the Buffalo Bills are a mediocre football team
    I have one more thing to say: meme
    Coincidentally bitches are a female dog
    We’ll see how Isabella likes my captain’s log
    I’ll wear your skins and look like a sexy ho
    Elsa: Bitch You should let it go!
    Aw hail snow!
    I’ll kick you out the open DOOOOOOOOR like it was a sparta kick
    Call me a fridge man ‘cause i freeze salad, prick!
    I don’t care what you’re going to say!
    Because you are very gay!

    Lara: fight the patriarchy
    don’t need no man just need some money

    Gatsby: i got money, money.

    Lara: fuck this now i got man and money

    Lara Croft and Jay Gatsby -

    gatsby fucked your girl, old sport
    lara croft stole your gold, old sport
    you’re old and good at sports
    i’m not old and bad at sports
    but you can be a sporty old sport
    and retort while i eat raspberry torts
    I bought my raspberry with money, old sport
    and he got his money cuz i stole it you whore-t
    fuck your girls oh yeah
    impregnate her west egg
    i’ll show you my green light like your name was daisy
    i rap better than jay z

    WHO WON
    WHO NEXT
    YOU DE CIDER

    turbil juk balls

    HOLD IT!


    Phoenix Wright and Miles Edgeworth -

    we the true besto couple I’m screaming yowie
    best two of all time we got the yaoi
    bitch and caeser? what is the connection
    nothing of course so i yell TAKE THAT
    hah you expected objection but no
    i will wreck you and your party of hos
    magaemememealatala
    i bet you didn’t even understand that
    jew
    you’re really gay
    like us
    aaaaahahhaa HEEEEEY

    Edgar Allan Poe and his cousin -
    uoguikut7yug,kyjgyhjkhygkujhuhkuuhkjkghjgjyggj (AAAH)
    dsvdfobfhrgdhfgsbdfvsdcsvdyuteyrbovfacdsWHORELORD


    Sub Zero and Scorpion -

    Scorpion: Get over here
    Sub-Zero: I spit cold rhymes to end these queers
    My rhymes may be cold but they’ll give you freezer BURN
    Your life is endangered by my cold rhymes like a umm.... Roseate Tern?
    Scorpion: Get over here
    Sub-Zero: My rhymes ride fly like Santa’s reindeer
    Scorpion: Get over here
    Sub-Zero: There’s nothing that refreshes like an ICE COLD beer
    Scorpion: Get over here
    Sub-Zero: My rhymes don’t just bite they FROSTbite… you queer.
    Scorpion: Get over here
    Sub-Zero: ummm… you can’t take the cold… I’ll call you a ummm… deer?
    *beat drops*
    Sub-Zero: I GOTTA HANS IT TO YOU, YOU’RE AN ICE COLD BITCH
    I’LL RUN YOU OVER, AND LEAVE YOU IN A COINCIDENTALLY ICED OVER DITCH
    MY RHYMES ARE COLD, BUT THEY’RE ALSO HOT, MOSTLY
    I’LL (freezer)BURN YOU LIKE…
    Scorpion: Get over here!
    Sub-Zero: Yeah. Ummm…
    Oh the weather outside is frightful
    but Sub-Zero’s lyrical fire is so delightful
    And since there’s no place to go…
    Scorpion: Get over here
    Sub-Zero: My rhymes are below 0ļ Celsius
    Scorpion: Get over here
    *they actually get over there*
    Scorpion: o.


    PoLoh -

    . . . bloop.


    Bill Cipher and MΔnchΔ -

    it’s funny how dumb you Δre!
    buy gold, then get run over by my CΔΔΔΔΔΔΔR
    420 meme it, smoke memes every dΔy
    by the wΔy, i bet that you’re GΔY


    Sparrow and YN’s dick -

    We’re totally irrelevant!


    Adonis and BBGUN -

    Adonis: It’s not like I l-like you or anything, bb-baka
    BBGUN: who are you running from
    probably me



    Karl Marx and Joseph Stalin -

    what the fuck we didn’t even know each other
    but we can still be lovers <3
    communisenpai~~~<3
    omg karl your so kawaii desu uguu~~
    http://i.imgur.com/rTrZMAn.jpg
    *they leave kissing and sparkling madly*


    TheRealNicePeter and EpicLlyod -

    yo i got a nice peter
    his peter’s really nice
    it’s colder than steel and colder than ice


    Coldsteel the Hedgeheg and Ebony D’Arkness Dementia Raven Way -

    hold it the FUCK RIGHT there
    how do you dare face us
    don’t steal but we the best of the best of the bestus
    *listens to Good Charlotte*


    Sam Pepper and Rangernumberx -

    Well then.


    Romleon and his teacher -

    We totally recommend the pony hypnosis
    Don’t know? we’ll give you a synopsis
    It makes you think you are whichever pony you pick,
    It turns your hands into hooves and enlarges your dick
    Let’s try it on my teacher,in 3.. 2… 1


    Robocop -

    STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM
    This is illegal you know

    Some guy: Hey, what happens when Batman and Robin get run over by a steam roller?
    They become…

    Flatman and Ribbon -

    ded.


    Shrek and Shadow the Hedgehog -

    Wow, these ships are too wack to handle!
    Let’s do it like we do every night on deviantArt
    Your canon is preposterous, the opposite of true original creative process (don’t steal pls)
    And in this Shrek sequel, we’ll give you a boner
    Starting with the shit you’ve all gone through to do the frick frack
    It’s a fact, Shrek x Shadow’s gonna have the final act!
    You built a laser grid without a safety switch
    And my bro Sanic was right, that’s some TASTY CHILI DOG YOU GOT SHREK
    Good thing you fuck under a steam roller
    Because you just got smashed
    You are poor lovers
    And that’s a fact
    Your ships aren’t real and it should be said
    let’s bring our son spongebob back from the ded
    Spongebob:
    hey things are getting scary
    when i find my dad cheating with wreck it ralph
    Shadow:
    what the fuck shrek i thought we had something
    Shrek:
    we did but you see
    *leans up to shadow*
    it’s all over now


    *shrek takes off his costume to reveal*

    DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAVID BOOOOOOWIE -

    ooh get rekt
    illuminati bitch

    WHO WON?
    WHO’S NEXT?
    YOU DECIDE!

    TERRIBLE BATTLES OF RAP

    ugh this was so shitty like comment subscirebw
    Last edited by Lancer; 11-14-2014 at 11:23 PM.

  7. #197
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    Cover - http://i.imgur.com/FB7d6OC.png

    Writers -
    Wumbo
    HostemSamuel
    Lohy
    Polar
    Manchey
    not sam fuck sam

    Spoiler: 

    ♫♫♫ welcome to terrible clip art battle #something. this is sponsored by ▲▲gold▲▲ ♫♫♫
    ♫♫♫ we have zeusí head bust ♫♫♫
    ♫♫♫ goign against loki ♫♫♫
    ♫♫♫ fight ♫♫♫


    Loki -

    You arent even real dude
    Youíre so jewish, the beatles say, ďhey judeĒ
    Youíre just a head but Iím the one who gets more head
    Plus I cocked your mum till she was dick done dead
    In my opinion youíre Zeus, I should call you the guitar lord from Spongebob!
    In my opinion youíre Dr. Zeus, I should call you a childrenís book SLOB
    M8 Iíll bust in yer fookin Ďead
    And last night I nutbusted all your wives in the bed
    I am SHOCKED that you donít like guys
    that was rude i apologize
    oops i lied, sorry not sorry
    you suck more than sambarmary
    When Iím done with you, youíll need an ass guard
    Youíre just mad that I r-CRASHED INTO YOU WITH MY CAR
    I have more fangirls than rangernumberx
    But unlike ranger, Iíve actually had sex! (Chitauri: OOOOOOOHH)
    You are tesseracting really stupid here
    You are #triggering me, you big dumb queeeeer
    Why didn't they do Jeues vs Zuese (spelt wrong sorry) I think it would have been a better fit
    Why would it be a better fit? Because Jeues is a jew, like zuese le tit
    Iím up all night to get Loki
    You have even uglier hair than Goky
    Like a cyclops, Iíll leave you with only one eye
    hi
    Not, so, fast
    Cortana says your greek so why dont you stikc these lyricks up your ass
    greek god? more like geek knob
    and when no one was looking your mom gave me a sneak job
    Who the fuck is Zeus? He looks like a deuce
    And I flow harder than spilt apple juice
    I rap better than Kendrick Lamar
    I bet in 20 years youíll be drunk at the bar
    Yo bitch Iím Loki, the bloopinest guy since Lohy
    And it turns out your wife is secretly a fat guy (fat guy)
    But now Iím back from the dead and Iím after your Head
    I Olympus Mounted your wives (again) in bed
    Like the great Stephen King once said, you gotta have fun!
    But when it comes to your stories, heck, Iíd rather read Percy Jack, son.

    Zeusí Head Bust -

    *Zeusí Head Bust does not say anything because itís just a bust of his head*

    Loki -

    Ö bloop

    *Suddenly, an Unidentified Hatted Future Rapper is BIRTHED OUT OF ZEUSí HEAD WHOA*

    Unidentified Hatted Future Rapper -

    See in the future you will see
    Some bitch ass Tom Hiddleston getting beaten by this MC
    I come out on Top like Hattington you canít beat me
    Iíll beat you so bad your fans shall no longer call you sexyÖ or something.
    Go and run your mouth, take a knife to your clit
    You canít dis this (probably a) dude without the wit
    They even paid (probably) Dan Bull to play me, dipshit!!!!!!!!!!!
    Tumblr got their hands so far up your rear call you Mitt
    In 2017 Barack Obama is no longer the head of state, but youíre like a head of cabbage
    Iím 1% through smacking you with muh complete package ahahahaha (Polar: letís from em)

    Loki -

    Call me a man without a hat Ďcause Iím SAFELY DANCING YOU
    Nobody knows who you are, so you might be a jew
    Your face might look like a cube so what the hell do you do
    I own a cube called the Tesseract, what the hell does it do?
    Nobody knows who you are so therefore nobody knows if you have a DICK
    I had your unidentified hatted future MOM here last night, her ass is what I licked!
    Which means Iím gonna be your unidentified future daddy
    now bend ogre for loki, lil unidentified hatted future laddy
    IT DOESNíT MATTER if youíre jack the ripper or dr jekyll
    when i here you rap, i just kek-kle

    Unidentified Hatted Future Rapper WITH A KNIFE -

    Do you know what happens when hunters see deer? #Shotsfired
    You know what happens when I take a knife to the clit of this queer?
    Thereíll be blood on the dance floor or some shit like that.
    Wait arenít I in like, London or something? *shrugs*
    But my rhymes will cut you like a knife
    No one saw Thor coming, except for everyone
    Did I mention I have a knife? Was that established?
    K? K.
    See here in the future, we need not rhyme
    The flow is designated by a complex algorithm, so yeah
    Also, Iím going to cut you in half now!

    *The Unidentified Rapper puts his hat on Zeusí head bust at the end of the verse, which causes Loki to explode. Suddenly, GABE NEWELL is attracted over by the scent of a fresh hat.*

    Gabe Newell -

    Prepare to get killed like Hiroshi Yamauchi
    yeah
    Youíre likely Jack the Ripper who killed people, just like Hiroshi Yamauchi
    mhm
    Iíll leave you dead in this battle like Hiroshi Yamauchi
    thats right
    Youíre gonna die, like everyone else in the world, like Hiroshi Yamauchi
    got em
    Iím Yoteslaying you just like Hiroshi Yamachi
    uh huh
    Billions of people have died, including Hiroshi Yamauchi
    owned
    You have a knife, which kills people, like Hiroshi Yamauchi
    damn son
    You know who died once? Hiroshi Yamauchi
    the cake is a lie
    half life 3 confirmed
    hats hats hats hats hats hats hats
    I just killed this rap, like Hiroshi Yamauchi!

    *lara croft sneaks in and steals the bust of zeus*

    Lara:
    Fight the patriarchy! I have the bust of Zeus!


    Gatsby:
    Sell it to me and Iíll give you some gold pls
    money money money money memes

    *jumpscare*

    Golden Freddy:
    ARE YOU READY FOR FREDDY? I GUESS NOT BECAUSE I SCARED YOU!
    THATS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOUíRE FRIENDS WITH THE JEWS!

    WHO WON?
    WHOíS NEXT?
    YOU DECIDE!

    TERRIBLE JOKE BATTLES OF BUY GOLD

  8. #198
    Lancer's Avatar Senior Member
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    needs more memes

    also gaben won
    Graphic Designer / YouTuber. Usually known as Mancha!

    @comicsansation

    Retired Moderator, as well as creator and owner of UBERocity on YouTube. Check us out!



  9. #199
    GonadTheNomad's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
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    I like how literal the Zeus portrayal was.
    Spoiler: 

    Act uqa wa it
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by ďAdonisĒ
    Act
    uqa
    wa
    it
    Gonad has no nads pass it on!!!!11!

  10. #200
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    CHRISTMAS SPECIAL WOOO

    Story behind the first is that someone on the wiki put "this is the first ever battle to not be a christmas one" on the Jack the Ripper vs Hannibal Lecter page. We joked about "NP hating Christmas" and "ERB losing it" due to this. Also, parody of Trump vs Scrooge.

    Cover - http://i.imgur.com/D4VelVN.png

    Writers -
    PolarBore
    Lohuydahutt
    Wumbo
    HostemSamuel (This guy sucks)
    AccordionChick
    Spoiler: 

    EPIC JOKE BATTLES OF MEH!
    SATAN CLAWS!
    VS!
    NICEPEETAAAAA!
    BEGIN!

    Satan Claws:
    Wake up, JEW! I'm about to take one hell of a dump
    … bloop.
    I'm like the… leaves of a Christmas tree, you're like the STUMP
    I'm not known for my heart but my SLEIGH BELL is still getting PUMPED.
    You remind me of Sam licking his armpit, cause you disgust me
    Keep your AIDs from Sambaba awai from me, don't even touch me
    I don't wear pants, I don't make flans
    I ruin rappers faster than Sanic (Sanic: fas)
    Almost 100 children in the world know how real I am
    But Sam doesn’t celebrate me cuz he’s a JEW, man!
    My raps'll haunt you, make you think you're going INSANE!!!!11
    You're about to see 3 MCs that’ll crash into you with their plane
    ...I wear pajamas
    Cause you suck, you really kinda suck, call you Sambama


    NicePeter:
    How dare you disturb me when I'm fapping on my chair
    You' ain’t even real dude! I ain't scared,
    Of this spooky Santa, you suck more than Sam’s streams,
    I do not believe in Christmas and I don’t believe those memes!

    *Santa sends out an elf to rap*

    Link:
    SHROOOOOCK, Peeta, I’m about to whip you with my COOOOOCK
    I'm Lonk, representing Hyrule, Hyrule, planet Hyrule, you sock
    Who's probably not rocking the Monopoly mustache
    Yo, I own the railroad in that one game nobody liked, I run these tracks
    You licked Lloyd’s Skyward Sword, now the Groose is Loose
    I’ll kick your soul and your butt, call it the Spirit Caboose!
    Because playing Newton and Nye is so selfish and wrong
    What good is your huge sweater if your friends are all getting ate (by king dodong-oooooooo)


    NicePeter:
    Hey! LISTEN!! Your raps don't unnerve me, they've got no gumption,
    What frightens me the most is your capabilities of extensive cock consumption
    NOT eating dicks and success, that's the life I've selected
    So enough with your Links to the Past, I'm not affected


    Identified Hatted Present Rapper:
    This is the part where Sam licks his pit
    ‘Cause I’m going to diss a dude WITH the wit
    Just take a lesson from The Cat in the Hat
    Oh wait I’m not actually a cat
    There's more to life than food, you, uhm, fat
    Yeah, uhm, take that
    In my opinion, you’re acting real selfish,
    I should call you a crab, because you’re real shellfish!
    If you don’t get off your lazy butt,
    You’ll be locked in a dark room with Gunnut! (ooo)


    NicePeter: *shudders*
    No! This isn't happening
    Oh, this is beautiful agony– wait!
    Actually, harkening back to the dead Santa's lecture (Satan: hwat)
    I still am expecting a final spookter!


    Creepypasta:
    please stop. (Ahh!) You're gonna die
    With no one to love you and no one to cry
    Alone by yourself like an UGLY FRENCH POODLE
    I Cock-er Spanieled your girl, gave her my Mary Doodle
    Cause you've chosen the path of a SELFISH man
    With Tiny Tom's HYPERREALISTIC blood on your hands
    The penance you pay for telling Lonk to consume cocks
    Shalt make you descend to hell with your Superman Socks


    NicePeter:
    Are these the shadows of memes that will be
    Or memes that should be only
    … bloop.
    Say it thus and pls don’t blow me homie
    I promise to mend my ways
    A friend to all memes is what I will become
    It's Christmas! I haven't missed my chance to be different, LandoChrist bless us every-

    WHO WON?
    WHO'S NEXT?
    YOU DECIDE!
    EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPIC JOKE BATTLES OF MEH!


    And now the second one.

    Writers -
    AccordionChick

    Cover - http://i.imgur.com/uj48Bm1.png

    Spoiler: 

    Spammable Sexter:
    GOOD EVENING CLARICE oops I mean Jack the ripper/
    hyde your kids, hyde your jekyll, hyde your strippers
    you don't wanna face off against me cause I'll eat your face dude
    I'D EAT YOU ALIIIIIIVEEEEE even though that's kinda gay dude
    Are you buffalo bill because you're running off with your balls between your legs
    I'll eat your ass with some fava beans, a nice Chianti, & some hard boiled eggs
    YOu make me sick but I'd still eat your disgusting brain like soup
    Nice muttonchops you silent lamb face, I don't give a poop! (ooh)

    Jackoff the Stripper:
    YOU DON’T KNOW ME! YOU CAN’T DIS ME! YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW ME!
    I killed people, you helped find a killer like the feds were your homies
    I may have mutton chops but it’s better than being a bald guy
    Are you Nicepeter Lecter or just that other short bald guy?
    I’m British you’re shittish you dumb scumb I can smell your cunt!
    Eat me & I’ll hurt the top of your mouth like Cap’n Jack the Ripper Crunch!
    I’m Danbull getting bitches with my swan schlong you stupid prick
    I’d rap some more but I need to give some streetwalkers my dick!

    Spammable Sexter:
    Do you have a clue who I am? I’ll get in your brain & eat it inside out
    I’m Hannibal the cannibal who’s an animal & I’m spammable, you little teapot short & stout!
    Are the lambs still screaming? I can’t hear over your shit raps thou anonymous hoe
    I’m a psychological psycho psychologist, is that a cape or some drapes bro? (ooo)

    Jackoff the Stripper:
    What? Was that a verse? It sounded like Ted Bundy in a blender
    I’m actually Polish brolish not like you, you sex offender!
    Wait that was uncalled for, I apologize because I’m a British man
    Wait or am I Polish, I don’t think you understand… uhhh

    Dead Stripper with a really low voice: Why’d you stop?...
    Jackoff the Stripper: I couldn’t think of a rhyme
    Dead Stripper with a really low voice: Just summon that nasty mofo bofolo boll!

    Buffalo Bill’s Tuck:
    UH! UH! UH! PUT THE LOTION ON YOUR SKIN SO I CAN WEAR IT
    You look like a size 14? Can you help me load up my couch?
    Wait shit, that didn’t rhyme but I have a girl in my basement
    You have a girl in the gutters & you have one in your stomach
    Fuck! I can’t rhyme worth a shit. You sire are a dipshit!!!!!!!11!!
    I’ll pierce my nipples then dance to some weird late 80s music
    What is this Miggs? I just shot baby gravy in your faces
    Don’t touch the tuck of Buffalo bills I don’t give a fuck, you’re in last places! (ooo kill ‘em literally)
    Last edited by Poles; 11-29-2014 at 05:55 PM.

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