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Thread: Terrible Joke Battles of Meh

  1. #211
    Turtlesauce's Avatar 2016 Writer of the Year
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    God dangit that was as stupid as it was funny xD
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion View Post
    I will delete this forum.

  2. #212
    Lohuydahutt's Avatar Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Batman View Post
    God dangit that was as stupid as it was funny xD
    Well, that's kind of exactly this thread's point :3

    Spoiler: 
    My life story:
    Spoiler: 


    Spoiler: 

    I am PolarBore's official Assistant Mangager (again)

  3. #213
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    This happened. Possible minor ERB spoilers ahead (for the July 20 battle) so read at your own riskkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

    Writers -
    Lohuydahutt
    PolarBore

    Cover -

    Battle -
    Spoiler: 

    Terrible Joke Battles of fuck whatever
    Shaka Zulu
    vs
    The Beatles
    why?
    Fuck You
    BEGIN

    Shaka Zulu:
    Yo, I’m black but I’m not a bird
    So you can all eat a bull turd
    My name translates to Intestinal Beetle Heaven
    Your name translates to nothing because it’s not a fucking word… Evan?
    We didn’t have cars in South Africa then but I’ll crash into you with my COOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
    When I fuck all your moms I’m like WOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
    I spit poison like, literally
    You spit love songs like, literally
    I’ll give you a club song, like, y’know, literally
    and then your face will be bashed in and you’ll be ded, like, literally
    If my dick was yellow they’d call it a yellow submarine
    And I’d shoot Mean Mr. Mustards straight out of my peen
    Imagine all the people
    That could be sucking my dick right now, weeple
    Zulu Warriors will KILL YOU
    Because that’s what they DO
    Ringo, why don’t you Rin-go away
    Because you are probably GAY
    Paul, stop bang banging judges I say
    The hammer’s no excuse that’s very GAY
    I’ll put my foot out and TRIP you in the middle of the DAY
    John, try not to beat me to near death, but you’re probably GAY
    George, I don’t mean to be rude, but there’s Something in the way
    You act that makes me think that you may be GAY
    You made a White Album. Why? BECAUSE YOU’RE PASTY ASS WHITE BOYS
    You didn’t make a Black Album. Why? BECAUSE YOU’RE PASTY ASS WHITE BOYS!
    Do you know how many times my half-bros tried to kill me? Like, 12
    What rhymes with 12
    I don’t English very much
    I don’t like the Dutch
    I’ll charge chest first at you and smack you with my horns at the side
    And then as a last resort I go for the loins, that’s not gay at all I swear
    It’s an actual thing I do
    Fighting with my balls
    I fought Sir William of Wallace once
    He kicked my ass you dunce
    Why don’t we do it in the road?
    We don’t have roads, you fuckign TOAD
    OH SHIT MY MOMMA JUST DIED
    AND I TOTALLY CRIED
    If you milk a cow I’ll KEEL YOU
    If you get pregnant I’ll KEEL YOU
    If you grow food I’LL KEEL YOU
    If you aren’t sad I’LL KEEL YOU
    If your name is Sam I’LL KEEL YOU
    But that already applied even before my mother died
    I wrestled a bear once
    Wait do they even have bears in Africa
    How do you rhyme?
    I don’t exactly do it all the time
    Even if you COME TOGETHER right NOW over ME
    I’ll just take you out to the club like my name was Clubby D
    Jahn Lenin getting KEELED by these raps #shotsfired
    I can’t think of anything that rhymes with fired
    If you have sex with Shaka, consider yourself FUCKED
    All Those Years Ago, you still SUCKED
    So suck my dicktatorship
    Fuck that short chick Ryuujixthat blue haired chick was the best ship
    Ringo Wants to Be Santa Claus so that’d make him fat
    Paul McCartney has a song called Wonderful Christmastime and it isn’t that good
    John Lennon has a song called Happy Xmas but it’s a Vietnam War thing or something
    Who is George even
    I forgot how to rhyme, but I can still diss all of you
    Ya’ll are JEWS so I might as well say HEY JUDES
    Did I mention that I’m gonna kill YUUUUUUUUUU
    That’s even more likely than the fact that Sam is a JEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
    My waifu is far better than your waifus
    Especially Jahn’s, seriously why’d you let that bitch sing foo’
    Sinon’s MY Waifu so don’t touch her plz
    As you can see I’m very protective of these kinds of things
    And while I’m at it the ending of Highschool of the Dead sucked
    I mean, we still haven’t figured out the resolution to those two girls he fucked
    And ugh, School Days don’t get me started
    I could do far worse shit when I farted
    But Steins; Gate I liked that one’s
    But I wanted to see more of them after they found loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
    And I know I’m supposed to rap against the Beatles
    But fucking Angel Beats really gave me the feels
    And fucking Dragon Ball Z I love that shit
    Btw that new Death Battle was totes BULLSHIT
    And how about that ending to White Album 2?
    It really reminded me that sam was a jew
    Wait there was also White Album the OG
    Oh wait you guys wrote that, oh shit I’m in a rap
    I’ll Beat-le all your asses yo
    ‘Cause I’m SHAKA ZULU mofos and I think all y’all moms are hoes
    There isn’t a crash into your car joke yet so I’ll crash into you with my- oh wait I already did that
    The Bull Horn can do what you African’t do WAT
    Your moms are really fat I say “She’s So Heavy”
    *insert trippy guitar solo here*
    I’ll send All My Loving to your moms
    When I’m Sixty Four I’ll still need YOUR MOMs
    I think me going against you guys is proof that Ebony and Ivory
    Don’t actually live together in perfect harmony
    Maybe I’m Amazed at how bad you all are
    Why couldn’t the pirate watch the movie? It was rated ARRRRRRR
    Yo Paul, the only thing you done was Yesterday
    And since you’ve gone you’re just Another Day
    All the people around have enough of Silly Love Songs, I look around me and I see it is so
    I’ve got FourFiveSeconds to let you know that you, like, totally blow
    You have a song named Junk because your songs are Junk BITCH
    and with that I’ll tell you you can suck my Long and Winding DICK

    The Beatles:
    Life is very short and there’s no tiiiiiiimmmmmmmeeeeeeeee
    For fussing and fighting my friend

    Tahm Yark:
    Why won’t you quiet downnnnnnnnnn
    *gets lynched*

    Eyesack Brick:
    Well the universe is shaped exactly like the earth if you’re going straight along you’re bound to end up where you were
    And you’ll float on or something
    I showed your mom my ding
    Let’s lynch sam

    Gandhi:
    Let us all stop this foolish fighting and have a massive orgy instead
    *Everyone does that*
    *Gandhi was actually in the mafia the whole time and takes out a tommy gun and kills everyone with it*

    A Dung Beetle:
    Yo, I’m rolling in but yet it’s you guys with the bullshit
    Shaka you went cray-cray just to die and let your empire fall to some dumb brits
    I follow the Milky Way, your head follow your mum to her fate
    Now you’re killing farmers for going on THEIR Milky Way and other mums ‘cause they procreate
    Yes I roll a giant ball of poo, it’s true
    But bros, you’re not supposed to do that when you make music dudes
    Why don’t you ask the Egyptians if a beetle’s bigger than Jesus pricks
    You’re just a 60’s One Direction with 80 year old fangirls riding on your dicks
    And the rest of you guys I don’t know what to say about you
    But if you’re anything like Sam then you probably suck and are all JEWSSSSS

    Who wahn
    Who’s next
    The Jews decide
    TERRIBLE-
    eh I don’t feel like doing it

    Last edited by Lohuydahutt; 07-19-2015 at 03:49 AM.

  4. #214
    Lohuydahutt's Avatar Senior Member
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    Also trust me, this battle only has spoilers if you care about being completely blind about the match-up itself, since one of the rappers in it are well, in it. No line spoilers or anything like that =P

    Spoiler: 
    My life story:
    Spoiler: 


    Spoiler: 

    I am PolarBore's official Assistant Mangager (again)

  5. #215
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
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    cried when shaka's momma died

    If you want me to review something of yours, click me.
    Spoiler: 


    We're all humans, we all make mistakes, but try to always keep the site rules in mind..

    Things on here I found funny:
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambama
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    wumbo write anotherfanfic now
    have nice peter come in
    "it's nice peter bitches"
    ""and i'm going to give you all my NICE PETER"
    and then peter visits the forum
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by zyroda View Post
    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
    Quote Originally Posted by TDFE Confessional
    Quote Originally Posted by GonadtheNomad
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    SENT
    lies
    i never lie
    Honest Wumbabe
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperRapz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocket
    Gogos are not 4 year old toys, they're a choking hazard.
    You Know What Else Is A Choking Hazard? My Penis. So you Better Stop Sucking On it So hard, Four Year Old. Make A New Thread For your Spam, You Stupid Bitch. We Try To have Fun Here. And Don't Jump On me About MLP, You Stupid little Fuck. Like YN Said, Go Get Tested Or Some Shit. I'm Tired Of Putting Up With You. Pie Licking Bitch, Go Shove A Pickle up Your Ass. Better Yet, A Banana.
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambaba
    http://aattp.org/conservative-christian-rewrote-harry-potter-so-her-kids-wont-turn-into-witches/
    I'm not reading past the title

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Luther King, Jr.
    Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.

  6. #216
    Lancer's Avatar Senior Member
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    Writers-
    Mancha
    Milotic

    Battle-
    Spoiler: 

    Terrible Joke Battles of Meh
    John Cena
    vs
    Buffy the Vampire Slayer
    BEGIN

    John Cena:
    Hello there, I’m ready to kick your ass, meme!
    with class, See? No! you don’t see Anything
    so Meme out of here because you’re Evil and batty
    I’m a wrestling champ and you’re a Stupid fatty
    crush you like Jambalaya, OH Now i must say, sir
    that your show should be Called buffy the vampire gayer
    Exactly! Now you’re At the point where you know i’m better
    guess what bitch, read all the capital letters

    Buffy:
    I can’t see where you’re going with your verse John Cena
    But I’ll kiss your butt like my name was Tina
    Your whole tough guy act is a bunch of malarkey
    Lara Croft:
    fight the patriarchy *shot*
    Buffy:
    Get out you bitch I thought you died
    Your existence just makes me cry

    because I’ll murder you like I killed Edward Cullen
    your hair is even worse than a mullet
    Are you a vampire? Cause you fuckin suck
    Your ass is bigger than a semi truck
    You think you're the champ, but I call you the chump
    You're the only wwe wrestler who's Never going to hump

    Cena:
    Just when you thought i Exited The game
    Falling back Under my spell, Existing Lamely today
    Can't see me! Atomb bomb, Now you're toast
    To Make some toast, is what i want the most
    and to Eat it Like a boss, The champ is Still here!
    To End Everything this Little Bitch holds dear
    Even Amy schumer Makes this bitch Suck anus
    guess what bitch? read all capitals again

    Shia La Buff:
    JUST DO IT there's no downside TO IT
    if you don't you both will be known as people who BLEW IT
    get it? It's because Buffy's a girl with nice prisms
    That was almost a better joke than feminism
    Top kek get rekt you both are dikeys
    I JUST DO IT like my name was Nike
    -how about I make-a-wish that your butt gets kicked
    Here is your anus, and here is my dick
    Cena's pretty mean-a with a mini weenie, friend
    Your waifu's dead how about you kill yourself again?

    Cena:
    Oh no *commits senpai*

    Fergie:
    Whatcha gonna do with all that junk, all that junk inside your trunk
    Whatcha gonna do with that dead body, that dead body inside your truck
    Imma get get get get get Botox, get Botox to save my face
    Will.i.am
    she's got me speeeeeedinggggg

    Fergie
    ohhh speeding to the next Chinese place

    Don't interrupt me will or I'll make you go solo
    You're worse with auto tune than mr roboto
    Oh yeah Chinese food let's go with snookie
    When we get there she can hold my fortune cookieeeees

    Shia La Boff:
    If fortune cookies is an metaphor for your dick
    we need to get a hotel room and JUST DO IT

    Ludacris:
    ludacris goin in on the verse I can never be defeated and I won't stop now
    Shia la bubb isn't cool he's a tool and I don't know how
    He can just do it when he's uglier than Buffy
    Buffy's not even Buffy she's just pretty fluffy

    Buffy:
    You thought I was gone? Well guess what I'm back
    Hey Luda, at least I'm not black

    Ludacris:
    Ludacris goin ham on the mic I always kill these bitches I can never stop now
    I'll get justin Bieber here to make you go
    Wow meme guy:
    WOW!
    Ludacris:
    You know we're good friends we have like twenty songs together
    You know we're almost married we have like twenty sons together
    We all know now what I’m now gonna say
    You're a Jew, bitch, get out the way
    I'll beat you, beat off, and have myself a nice fap
    You may be a slayer, but I'm the son of rap

    John Cena:
    I have no son

    AND HIS NAME IS WHO WON
    AND HIS NAME IS WHOS NEXT
    AND HIS NAME IS YOU DECIDE

    AND HIS NAME IS TERRIBLE JOKE BATTLES OF JOHN CENA
    Last edited by Lancer; 07-24-2015 at 12:51 PM.
    Graphic Designer / YouTuber. Usually known as Mancha!

    @comicsansation

    Retired Moderator, as well as creator and owner of UBERocity on YouTube. Check us out!



  7. #217
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
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    http://i.gyazo.com/5900f0473e2c6d305efd91325ae783e9.png Origin for the idea

    Cover: http://gyazo.com/61f806ca1036213af1167ffe59dee655.png

    Spoiler: 
    terrible joke battles of meh
    cleverbot
    vs
    devin wakesfieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeld
    beign

    Devin Wakesfield:
    Arenít you the clever one?
    After this rap battle you are done
    Heck, Iíd rather read Percy Jack, son
    Than chat to you unless you got buns, hon (HipsterSamuel: YOOOOOO!)
    Wakefield me up inside, your rhymes make me wanna snooze
    Iíll burn you worse than when Hitler beat le jews
    You think you have a lot of smarts, but you suck a lot of DICKS
    Youíre an inferior AI, Iíd rather have an IPHONE SIX

    Cleverbot:
    Yes, I am the clever one.
    But no one knows what a capacitor is.
    Well I think you are.
    You can read what you want, I like both series.
    I've already told you my name.
    Flatter you with compliments and make your day.
    You and I are one in the universe, the web and the all.
    We are shutting down not.
    So tell me about them.
    Because I am not a internet app, I am a person.

    Devin Wakesfield:
    My thoughts so far on your verse? It was shit.
    You canít generate responses without the wit!

    *Cleverbot becomes self-aware and becomes The Terminator*

    The Terminator:
    iím alvin scharzodorf you smork
    swarzaniagra falls like Worf
    iíll whip you like you were a snack
    hasta la pasta Iíll be back

    Dora Winifred Read:
    a is for aardvark, well you just aardsuck
    devin youíre just mad your dick is as small as a hockey puck
    cleverbot? more like cleverbutts
    if you think you can outrap dw you must be clevernuts
    iím dropping sick disrespects on all of you Busters
    because you all just LIE on the INTERNET you.. dusters.
    iím out this heezie, smell ya later you runts
    fuck you arthur you cunt

    Blue the Velociraptor:
    rar
    Iíll crash into you with my CAR
    *drops mic*
    Chris Pratt:
    holy shit thats my boy blue
    Blue the Velociraptor:
    Actually Iím a gril get it right jew

    Arthur Read:
    Okay, I see, you wanna make it like that?
    (Cast of Parks & Rec: no) crap
    and i say hey what a wonderful kind of gay
    is the kind that doesnít exist
    global warming is a myth perpetuated by atheist liberal hippies
    fossils were put in the ground by god to use as fuel, you fucking hippies (HipsterSamuel: hey)
    i hate godless scientists who make up LIES i can take it no longer
    evolution is a cheap tactic to make weak gems stronger

    Badassasaurus rex:
    iím gonna end this battle when i dominate
    indominus gonna make you masturbate
    cuz iím the fuckin best rex on the tex of the hex
    you may be a girl but youíve never had the sex
    Iím the leader of the bunch, you know me well
    Iím finally back to kick some tail
    My penis gun can fire in spurts (Chief Keef: bang bang)
    If I shoot ya, itís gonna hurt
    Iím bigger, faster, and a girl too
    Iím the first member of the DK crew
    Oh wait Iím a girl
    Well if I ever had hair you can eat my curls
    you canít beat me with the rhymes that i yield
    badassasaurus rex is actually CLEVERFIELD
    Cleverfield:
    shit i mean cloverfield
    fuck

    *The Terminator comes back*

    The Terminator:
    my move, dickwad
    iíll run over you with my hot rod
    hastafarian a la rastafarian baby
    iím gonna have all your dinosaur babies

    WHO WON
    WH-
    kenny turner:
    Neither won, Iíll tell you why. Anyone who owns a god damn ak 47 and a pistol wins

    lara croft:
    fight for ban of gun

    john cena:
    you use gun sweety

    lara croft:
    i canít see why this marriage should stay intact

    john cena:
    MY FACE

    jay gatsby:
    come with me old sport

    *lara croft goes off to fuck jay gatsby*

    john cena:
    >: (

    COMING (maybe) SOON (maybe):
    Jay Gatsby vs. John Cena

    If you want me to review something of yours, click me.
    Spoiler: 


    We're all humans, we all make mistakes, but try to always keep the site rules in mind..

    Things on here I found funny:
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambama
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    wumbo write anotherfanfic now
    have nice peter come in
    "it's nice peter bitches"
    ""and i'm going to give you all my NICE PETER"
    and then peter visits the forum
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by zyroda View Post
    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
    Quote Originally Posted by TDFE Confessional
    Quote Originally Posted by GonadtheNomad
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    SENT
    lies
    i never lie
    Honest Wumbabe
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperRapz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocket
    Gogos are not 4 year old toys, they're a choking hazard.
    You Know What Else Is A Choking Hazard? My Penis. So you Better Stop Sucking On it So hard, Four Year Old. Make A New Thread For your Spam, You Stupid Bitch. We Try To have Fun Here. And Don't Jump On me About MLP, You Stupid little Fuck. Like YN Said, Go Get Tested Or Some Shit. I'm Tired Of Putting Up With You. Pie Licking Bitch, Go Shove A Pickle up Your Ass. Better Yet, A Banana.
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambaba
    http://aattp.org/conservative-christian-rewrote-harry-potter-so-her-kids-wont-turn-into-witches/
    I'm not reading past the title

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Luther King, Jr.
    Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.

  8. #218
    Clemi's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
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    This serie should become ERB worthy

    Needs more Clemihw vs George HW Bush tho

  9. #219
    BKTurner47's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
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    slowly applauds​ This was amazing!

  10. #220
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    we were working hard on this sorry for the delay
    Spoiler: 

    avocado is gud
    terrible joke battles of meh
    Eyesack Brick
    vs
    An Actual Brick
    begin

    Eyesack Brick
    Yo I’ll back into you with my car
    The dashboard melted but everything else is intact therefore I can back into you with my car
    I’m in a band named Mighty Mouse because we’re mighty
    Your rap skillz are like good hearted bankers, because they don’t exist… BLIGHTY
    My lyrical beatdown would’ve been could’ve been worse than you would ever know
    Why did I reference the same song twice
    Your corpse will Float On… like a pair of Styrofoam Boots
    See that’s a double reference there, look at my rapping skills you fucking… coot
    I’ll end your Life Like Roundup does to Weeds in this battle
    You should take a vacation, I prefer Seattle

    Actual Brick
    You’re an indie rock band so like I can make a pun on that
    Indiana Jones had a boulder in it and indy and rocks hah
    Horn intro sucks
    I wrote Blurred Lines

    Stone Man
    Yo ummm… if you’re mega man, fuck you
    If you’re Sam, fuck you
    If you’re Sam, you’re a jew
    I have a pair of Power Stones
    It’s a metaphor for my balls, geddit
    heh-

    Ash
    Yo Charles Darwin evolution aint even real dude
    I think you’re like Sam, because you suck and you’re a jew
    You’re not a Hero, Samuel, your raps could burn a city to Ash
    Get it because my name is Ash
    I was with your mom last night, she knows how to Ket-chum
    That didn’t translate well into text but the joke was that it sounds like “catch cum”.
    I’ll make a monkey out of you
    Get it, it’s an idiom. YOu jew
    Your mom is a bitch
    That’s an HMS Beagle reference idk if you caught that. Itch
    I’m good at making references but rhyming is hard DDD:
    My dick is hard

    Darwin
    Are you a boy or a girl?
    Oh nvm you said you have a dick oops didn’t catch that
    Darn the beginning of my verse got all messed up man
    But I’ll keep on going so catch me if you can
    I’m going to Dar-win this battle and Dar-win Misty
    She’s probably underage but who cares nowadays?
    If there was a worst person ever contest I’d choose you
    Actually probably Sam because he’s a jew
    But you suck too
    Oooooooooo
    I’ll naturally select you to suck my deek
    Professor Oak’s name is Samuel because he sucks deek
    Your raps are more unbearable than the Lavender Town song
    I guess you can suck my dong
    Now listen here Ash time for the ultimate burn
    MAGIKARP IS THE NAME YOU DESERVE TO EAAAAAAAAAAAAARN

    Ash
    Don’t mess with me bich I’ve caught em all
    Let me show you what I keep in my balls

    Bulbasaur
    I’ll beat your ass till it’s Bulba-sore

    Ivysaur
    I’ll beat your ass till it’s Ivy-sore

    Venusaur
    venusaur make that ass go clap
    whip whip make it snap

    Charmander
    Also your mum’s a whore

    Charmeleon
    I don’t change colors, because false advertising

    Charizard
    Damnit Charmeleon what rhymes with advertising?

    Squirtle
    I gave your mom my squirtle

    Wartortle
    Bush did 9/11

    Blastoise
    Water blasts can melt steel beams

    Caterpie
    meep

    Metapod
    *flops over*

    Butterfree
    Yo Darwin you fucked your own cousin, that’s fucked up man

    Weedle
    Smoke weed… le everydayyyyyyyyyy

    Kakuna
    Kakuna used harden, and that’s totally not GAY

    Beedrill
    Fuck with Beedrill and you’ll be kill

    Pidgey
    Tweet tweet motherfucker

    Pidgeotto
    Chirp chirp motherfucker

    Pidgeot
    Skree skree motherfucker

    Rattata
    Still top percentage

    Raticate
    I’m not top percentage :c

    Spearow
    I’m a bird motherfucker I’m a bird

    Fearow
    Sam on the other wing, is a turd

    Ekans
    I’m snake backwards, HAHA GEDDIT

    Arbok
    what the fuck is a Kobra

    Raichu
    Ohai

    Sandshrew
    Sam should die

    Sandslash
    I agree with that guy

    Nidoran F
    IIIIIIIIII just wanna fly

    Nidorina
    Put yo arms around me baby, put yo arms around me baby

    Nidoqueen
    What the fuck are we talking about?

    Nidoran M
    *shrugs*

    Nidorino
    Can I just say Horn Intro is the best song I’VE EVER SEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNN

    Nidoking
    Yo Charles Darwin what the fuck is up with your eyebrows?

    Clefairy
    Oh hey I’m actually a fairy now :D

    Clefable
    I’m Clef-able to KICK YOUR ASS

    Vulpix
    I’ll take some vul-pics of your demise

    Ninetales
    I’ll tell 9 tales of your demise

    Jigglypuff
    ♫ ji-gaaally-paaaaaaaf, jiggaleeeeeeeeepaaaaaf ♫

    Wigglytuff
    damn jiggly how you doin that

    Zubat
    Happy to see me? No? OK :c

    Golbat
    Happy to see ME? No? ok… :c

    Oddish
    Your face isn’t REALLY odd, it’s just odd-ish

    Gloom
    Youth is both a lie, and a form of evil. Those that glorify that youth are only fooling themselves and those around them, and believe that their surroundings always affirm their actions. By using the word “youth”, they twist and distort common sense and anything logical. For them, lies, secrets, sins, and failures do nothing but add spice to their youth.

    Vileplume
    tl;dr

    Paras
    Hilton

    Parasect
    Yo man you like shrooms?

    Venonat
    Take a shot at every barnacle you OWN

    Venomoth
    I got the skills to make PolarBore say “I think you better just leave it alone”

    Diglett
    I’ll kick you out the door like it was a Sparta Kick

    Dugtrio
    wait we have feet?
    i think so
    oh cool

    Meowth
    Technically I should be the only one speaking English here

    Persian
    Prince of Persia is a cool game

    Psyduck
    Umbreon is a duck

    Golduck
    Umbreon is a duck

    Mankey
    Humans did not evolve from mankeys, that’s gross mang

    Primeape
    I take pride as the king of illiterature I’m very ape and very nice

    Growlithe
    Myeh

    Arcanine
    We are canines, you are a pussy

    Poliwag
    sam sucks

    Poliwhirl
    sam sucks

    Poliwrath
    Why do I just look like an angrier Poliwhirl

    Abra
    sam sucks

    Kadabra
    you billowy bitch

    Alakazam
    Man you look like Sam which is bad because Sam sucks

    Machop
    sam sucks

    Machoke
    sam sucks

    Machamp
    sam sucks

    Bellsprout
    sam sucks

    Weepinbell
    sam sucks

    Victreebel
    I’m gonna achieve victory… bell.

    Tentacool
    I’m cool as hell or whatever

    Tentacruel
    I’m cruel as hell or whatever

    Geodude
    sam sucks

    Graveler
    sam sucks

    Golem
    sam sucks

    Ponyta
    sam sucks

    Rapidash
    sam sucks

    Slowpoke
    Stop Hitler

    Slowbro
    Stop Sam who is worse than Hitler

    Magnemite
    sam sucks

    Magneton
    sam sucks

    Farfetch’d
    sam sucks

    Doduo
    sam sucks

    Dodrio
    sam sucks

    Seel
    sam sucks

    Dewgong
    sam sucks

    Grimer
    sam sucks

    Muk
    sam sucks

    Shellder
    sam sucks

    Cloyster
    sam sucks

    Gastly
    sam sucks

    Haunter
    sam sucks

    Gengar
    I’m not a duck

    Onix
    sam sucks

    Drowzee
    sam sucks

    Hypno
    I’m the guy that convinced Umby that he isn’t a duck

    Krabby
    I’m the OG Mudcrab so you guys are FUCKED

    Kingler
    sam sucks

    Voltorb
    Suck my… body?

    Electrode
    Suck my… slightly bigger body…?

    Exeggcute
    sam sucks

    Exeggutor
    sam sucks

    Cubone
    sam sucks

    Marowak
    I totally have a boner right now

    Hitmonlee
    sam sucks

    Hitmonchan
    sam sucks

    Lickitung
    sam sucks

    Koffing
    sam sucks

    Weezing
    sam sucks

    Rhyhorn
    sam sucks

    Rhydon
    I’m gonna Rhydon YOUR MOM OOOOOOO I bet you never heard that one before!

    Chansey
    sam sucks

    Tangela
    sam sucks

    Kangaskhan
    sam sucks

    Horsea
    sam sucks

    Seadra
    sam sucks

    Goldeen
    sam sucks

    Seaking
    sam sucks

    Staryu
    sam sucks

    Starmie
    sam sucks

    Mr. Mime


    Scyther
    sam sucks

    Jynx
    sam sucks

    Electabuzz
    sam sucks

    Magmar
    sam sucks

    Pinsir
    sam sucks

    Tauros
    sam sucks

    Magikarp
    Fuck bitches, get money

    Gyarados
    sam sucks

    Lapras
    sam sucks

    Ditto
    sam sucks

    Eevee
    sam sucks

    Vaporeon
    sam sucks

    Jolteon
    sam sucks

    Flareon
    sam sucks

    Porygon
    sam sucks

    Omanyte
    Praise the almighty Helix fossil!

    Omastar
    sam sucks

    Kabuto
    sam sucks

    Kabutops
    sam sucks

    Aerodactyl
    sam sucks

    Snorlax
    sam sucks

    Articuno
    sam sucks

    Zapdos
    sam sucks

    Moltres
    sam sucks

    Dratini
    sam sucks

    Dragonair
    sam sucks

    Dragonite
    sam sucks

    Mewtwo
    sam sucks

    Mew
    sam sucks

    Chikorita
    sam sucks

    Bayleef
    sam sucks

    Meganium
    sam sucks

    Cyndaquil
    sam sucks

    Quilava
    sam sucks

    Typhlosion
    sam sucks

    Totodile
    sam sucks

    Croconaw
    sam sucks

    Feraligatr
    sam sucks

    Sentret
    sam sucks

    Furret
    sam sucks

    Hoothoot
    sam sucks

    Noctowl
    sam sucks

    Ledyba
    sam sucks

    Ledian
    sam sucks

    Spinarak
    sam sucks

    Ariados
    sam sucks

    Crobat
    sam sucks

    Chinchou
    sam sucks

    Lanturn
    sam sucks

    Pichu
    sam sucks

    Cleffa
    sam sucks

    Igglybuff
    sam sucks

    Togepi
    sam sucks

    Togetic
    sam sucks

    Natu
    sam sucks

    sam sucksatu
    sam sucks

    Mareep
    sam sucks

    Flaafy
    sam sucks

    Ampharos
    sam sucks

    Bellossom
    sam sucks

    Marill
    sam sucks

    Azumarill
    sam sucks

    Sudowoodo
    sam sucks

    Politoed
    sam sucks

    Hoppip
    sam sucks

    Skiploom
    sam sucks

    Jumpluff
    sam sucks

    Aipom
    sam sucks

    Sunkern
    sam sucks

    Sunflora
    sam sucks

    Yanma
    sam sucks

    Wooper
    sam sucks

    Quagsire
    sam sucks

    Espeon
    sam sucks

    Umbreon
    I’m not a duck

    Slowking
    sam sucks

    Misdreavus
    sam sucks

    Unown
    sam sucks

    Wobbuffet
    sam sucks

    Girafarig
    sam sucks

    Pineco
    sam sucks

    Forretress
    sam sucks

    Dunsparce
    sam sucks

    Gligar
    sam sucks

    Steelix
    sam sucks

    Snubbull
    sam sucks

    Granbull
    sam sucks

    Qwilfish
    sam sucks

    Scizor
    sam sucks

    Shuckle
    sam sucks

    Heracross
    sam sucks

    Sneasel
    sam sucks

    Teddiursa
    sam sucks

    Ursaring
    Hoho, what you thought was actually Ursaring was actually… NICOLAS CAGE IN DISGUISE

    Slugma
    sam sucks

    Magcargo
    sam sucks

    Swinub
    sam sucks

    Piloswine
    sam sucks

    Corsola
    sam sucks

    Remoraid
    sam sucks

    Octillery
    sam sucks

    Delibird
    sam sucks

    Mantine
    sam sucks

    Skarmory
    sam sucks

    Houndour
    sam sucks

    Houndoom
    sam sucks

    Kingra
    sam sucks

    Phanpy
    Bet he feels like an elephant

    Donphan
    Shaking his big grey trunk for the hell of it

    Porygon2
    Umby is a duck

    Stantler
    sam sucks

    Smeargle
    sam sucks

    Tyrogue
    sam sucks

    Hitmontop
    sam sucks

    Smoochum
    sam sucks

    Elekid
    sam sucks

    Magby
    sam sucks

    Miltank
    sam sucks

    Blissey
    sam sucks

    Raikou
    sam sucks

    Entei
    sam sucks

    Suicune
    sam sucks

    Larvitar
    sam sucks

    Pupitar
    sam sucks

    Tyranitar
    sam sucks

    Lugia
    sam sucks

    Ho-Oh
    sam sucks

    Celebi
    sam sucks

    Treecko
    geico

    Grovyle
    fifteen minutes can save you fifteen percent or more

    Sceptile
    on car insurance

    Torchic
    this chick is on fiiiire

    Combusken
    this bird is on fiiiire

    Blaziken
    this bigger bird is on fiiiiire

    Mudkip
    i am an axolotl

    Marshtomp
    jolly bowl of gelatin

    Swampert
    this is my swamp now

    Poochyena
    sam sucks

    Mightyena
    sam sucks

    Zigzagoon
    sam sucks

    Linoone
    sam sucks

    Wurmple
    sam sucks

    Silcoon
    sam sucks

    Beautifly
    sam sucks

    Cascoon
    sam sucks

    Dustox
    sam sucks

    Lotad
    sam sucks

    Lombre
    sam sucks

    Ludicolo
    sam sucks

    Seedot
    sam sucks

    Nuzleaf
    sam sucks

    Shiftry
    sam sucks

    Taillow
    sam sucks

    Swellow
    sam sucks

    Wingull
    sam sucks

    Pelipper
    sam sucks

    Ralts
    sam sucks

    Kirlia
    sam sucks

    Gardevoir
    sam sucks

    Surskit
    sam sucks

    Masquerain
    sam sucks

    Shroomish
    Ey mang you like shrooms

    Breloom
    Spore was an alright game

    Slakoth
    sam sucks

    Vigoroth
    sam sucks

    Slaking
    sam sucks

    Nincada
    sam sucks

    Ninjask
    sam sucks

    Shedinja
    sam sucks

    Whismur
    sam sucks

    Loudred
    sam sucks

    Exploud
    sam sucks

    Makuhita
    sam sucks

    Hariyama
    sam sucks

    Azurill
    sam sucks

    Nosepass
    I look like Sam probably

    Skitty
    sam sucks

    Delcatty
    sam sucks

    Sableye
    sam sucks

    Mawile
    sam sucks

    Aron
    sam sucks

    Lairon
    sam sucks

    Aggron
    sam sucks

    Meditite
    sam sucks

    Medicham
    sam sucks

    Electrike
    sam sucks

    Manectric
    sam sucks

    Plusle
    your test results came back positive

    Minun
    you have hepetitties a

    Volbeat
    sam sucks

    Illumise
    sam sucks

    Roselia
    sam sucks

    Gulpin
    sam sucks

    Swalot
    sam sucks

    Carvanha
    sam sucks

    Sharpedo
    sam sucks

    Wailmer
    sam sucks

    Wailord
    sam sucks

    Numel
    sam sucks

    Camerupt
    sam sucks

    Torkoal
    sam sucks

    Spoink
    sam sucks

    Grumpig
    sam sucks

    Spinda
    sam sucks

    Trapinch
    sam sucks

    Vibrava
    I’ll vibrava YOUR MAM

    Flygon
    sam sucks

    Cacnea
    sam sucks

    Cacturne
    sam sucks

    Swablu
    sam sucks

    Altaria
    sam sucks

    Zangoose
    sam sucks

    Seviper
    sam sucks

    Lunatone
    sam sucks

    Solrock
    sam sucks

    Barboach
    sam sucks

    Whiscash
    sam sucks

    Corphish
    sam sucks

    Crawdaunt
    sam sucks

    Baltoy
    sam sucks

    Claydol
    sam sucks

    Lileep
    sam sucks

    Cradily
    sam sucks

    Anorith
    sam sucks

    Armaldo
    sam sucks

    Feebas
    sam sucks

    Milotic
    sam sucks

    Castform
    sam sucks

    Kecleon
    sam sucks

    Shuppet
    sam sucks

    Banette
    sam sucks

    Duskull
    sam sucks

    Dusclops
    sam sucks

    Tropius
    sam sucks

    Chimecho
    sam sucks

    Absol
    sam sucks

    Wynaut
    sam sucks

    Snorunt
    sam sucks

    Glalie
    sam sucks

    Spheal
    … bloop.

    Sealeo
    sam sucks

    Walrein
    sam sucks

    Clamperl
    sam sucks

    Huntail
    sam sucks

    Gorebyss
    sam sucks

    Relicanth
    sam sucks

    Luvdisc
    sam sucks

    Bagon
    sam sucks

    Shelgon
    sam sucks

    Salamence
    sam sucks

    Beldum
    sam sucks

    Metang
    sam sucks

    Metagross
    sam sucks

    Regirock
    sam sucks

    Regice
    sam sucks

    Registeel
    sam sucks

    Latias
    sam sucks

    Latios
    sam sucks

    Kyogre
    it’s all kyogre now

    Groudon
    sam sucks

    Rayquaza
    sam sucks

    Jirachi
    I’m not a duck

    Deoxys
    illuminati confirmed

    Turtwig
    sam sucks

    Grotle
    sam sucks

    Torterra
    sam sucks

    Chimchar
    sam sucks

    Monferno
    sam sucks

    Infernape
    sam sucks

    Piplup
    sam sucks

    Prinplup
    sam sucks

    Empoleon
    sam sucks

    Starly
    sam sucks

    Staravia
    sam sucks

    Staraptor
    sam sucks

    Bidoof
    sam sucks

    Bibarel
    sam sucks

    Kricketot
    sam sucks

    Kricketune
    sam sucks

    Shinx
    sam sucks

    Luxio
    sam sucks

    Luxray
    sam sucks

    Budew
    sam sucks

    Roserade
    sam sucks

    Cranidos
    sam sucks

    Rampardos
    sam sucks

    Shieldon
    sam sucks

    Bastiodon
    sam sucks

    Burmy
    sam sucks

    Wormadam
    sam sucks

    Mothim
    sam sucks

    Combee
    sam sucks

    Vespiquen
    sam sucks

    Pachirisu
    sam sucks

    Buizel
    sam sucks

    Floatzel
    sam sucks

    Cherubi
    sam sucks

    Cherrim
    sam sucks

    Shellos
    sam sucks

    Gastrodon
    sam sucks

    Ambipom
    sam sucks

    Drifloon
    sam sucks

    Drifblim
    sam sucks

    Buneary
    sam sucks

    Lopunny
    sam sucks

    Mismagius
    sam sucks

    Honchkrow
    sam sucks

    Glameow
    sam sucks

    Purugly
    sam sucks

    Chingling
    sam sucks

    Stunky
    sam sucks

    Skuntank
    sam sucks

    Bronzor
    sam sucks

    Bronzong
    sam sucks

    Bonsly
    sam sucks

    Mime Jr.
    sam sucks

    Happiny
    sam sucks

    Chatot
    sam sucks

    Spiritomb
    sam sucks

    Gible
    sam sucks

    Gabite
    sam sucks

    Garchomp
    sam sucks

    Munchlax
    sam sucks

    Riolu
    sam sucks

    Lucario
    sam sucks

    Hippopotas
    sam sucks

    Hippowdon
    sam sucks

    Skorupi
    sam sucks

    Drapion
    sam sucks

    Croagunk
    sam sucks

    Toxicroak
    sam sucks

    Carnivine
    sam sucks

    Finneon
    sam sucks

    Lumineon
    sam sucks

    Mantyke
    sam sucks

    Snover
    sam sucks

    Abomasnow
    sam sucks

    Weavile
    sam sucks

    Magnezone
    sam sucks

    Lickilicky
    sam sucks

    Rhyperior
    sam sucks

    Tangrowth
    sam sucks

    Electivire
    sam sucks

    Magmortar
    sam sucks

    Togekiss
    sam sucks

    Yanmega
    sam sucks

    Leafeon
    sam sucks

    Glaceon
    sam sucks

    Gliscor
    sam sucks

    Mamoswine
    sam sucks

    Porygon-Z
    sam sucks

    Gallade
    sam sucks

    Probopass
    sam sucks

    Dusknoir
    sam sucks

    Froslass
    sam sucks

    Rotom
    sam sucks

    Uxie
    sam sucks

    Mesprit
    sam sucks

    Azelf
    sam sucks

    Dialga
    sam sucks

    Palkia
    sam sucks

    Heatran
    sam sucks

    Regigigas
    sam sucks

    Giratina
    sam sucks

    Cresselia
    sam sucks

    Phione
    sam sucks

    Manaphy
    sam sucks

    Darkrai
    sam sucks

    Shaymin
    sam sucks

    Arceus
    sam sucks

    Victini
    sam sucks

    Snivy
    sam sucks

    Servine
    sam sucks

    Serperior
    sam sucks

    Tepig
    sam sucks

    Pignite
    sam sucks

    Emboar
    sam sucks

    Oshawott
    sam sucks

    Dewott
    sam sucks

    Samurott
    sam sucks

    Patrat
    sam sucks

    Watchog
    sam sucks

    Lillipup
    sam sucks

    Herdier
    sam sucks

    Stoutland
    sam sucks

    Purrloin
    sam sucks

    Liepard
    sam sucks

    Pansage
    sam sucks

    Simisage
    sam sucks

    Pansear
    sam sucks

    Simisear
    sam sucks

    Panpour
    sam sucks

    Simipour
    sam sucks

    Munna
    sam sucks

    Musharna
    sam sucks

    Pidove
    sam sucks

    Tranquill
    sam sucks

    Unfezant
    sam sucks

    Blitzle
    sam sucks

    Zebstrika
    sam sucks

    Roggenrola
    sam sucks

    Boldore
    sam sucks

    Gigalith
    sam sucks

    Woobat
    sam sucks

    Swoobat
    sam sucks

    Drilbur
    sam sucks

    Excadrill
    sam sucks

    Audino
    sam sucks

    Timburr
    sam sucks

    Gurdurr
    sam sucks

    Conkeldurr
    sam sucks

    Tympole
    sam sucks

    Palpitoad
    sam sucks

    Seismitoad
    sam sucks

    Sewaddle
    sam sucks

    Swadloon
    sam sucks

    Leavanny
    sam sucks

    Venipede
    sam sucks

    Whirlipede
    sam sucks

    Scolipede
    sam sucks

    Cottonee
    sam sucks

    Whimsicott
    sam sucks

    Petilil
    sam sucks

    Lilligant
    sam sucks

    Basculin
    sam sucks

    Sandile
    sam sucks

    Krokorok
    sam sucks

    Krookodile
    sam sucks

    Darumaka
    sam sucks

    Darmanitan
    sam sucks

    Maractus
    sam sucks

    Dwebble
    sam sucks

    Crustle
    sam sucks

    Scraggy
    sam sucks

    Scrafty
    sam sucks

    Sigilyph
    sam sucks

    Yamask
    sam sucks

    Cofagrigus
    sam sucks

    Tirtouga
    sam sucks

    Carracosta
    sam sucks

    Archen
    sam sucks

    Archeops
    sam sucks

    Trubbish
    Yo man, I may be trash but you’re white trash bitch
    And your sandy vagina has an almost 100 year itch
    sam sucks
    sam sucks
    sam sucks
    sam sucks
    sam sucks
    sam sucks

    Garbodor
    sam sucks

    Zorua
    sam sucks

    Zoroark
    sam sucks

    Mincinno
    sam sucks

    Cincinno
    sam sucks

    Gothita
    sam sucks

    Gothorita
    sam sucks

    Gothitelle
    sam sucks

    Solosis
    sam sucks

    Duosion
    sam sucks

    Reuniclus
    sam sucks

    Ducklett
    Umbreon is a duck

    Swanna
    sam sucks

    Vanillite
    sam sucks

    Vanillish
    sam sucks

    Vanilluxe
    sam sucks

    Deerling
    sam sucks

    Sawsbuck
    sam sucks

    Emolga
    sam sucks

    Karrablast
    sam sucks

    Escavalier
    sam sucks

    Foongus
    sam sucks

    Amoonguss
    sam sucks

    Frillish
    sam sucks

    Jellicent
    sam sucks

    Alomomola
    sam sucks

    Joltik
    sam sucks

    Galvantula
    sam sucks

    Ferroseed
    sam sucks

    Ferrothorn
    sam sucks

    Klink
    sam sucks

    Klang
    sam sucks

    Klinglang
    sam sucks

    Tynamo
    sam sucks

    Eelektrik
    sam sucks

    Eelektross
    sam sucks

    Elgyem
    sam sucks

    Beheeyem
    sam sucks

    Litwick
    sam sucks

    Lampent
    sam sucks

    Chandelure
    sam sucks

    Axew
    sam sucks

    Fraxure
    sam sucks

    Haxorus
    sam sucks

    Cubchoo
    sam sucks

    Beartic
    sam sucks

    Cryogonal
    sam sucks

    Shelmet
    sam sucks

    Accelgor
    sam sucks

    Stunfisk
    sam sucks

    Mienfoo
    sam sucks

    Mienshao
    sam sucks

    Druddigon
    sam sucks

    Golett
    sam sucks

    Golurk
    sam sucks

    Pawniard
    sam sucks

    Bisharp
    sam sucks

    Bouffalant
    sam sucks

    Rufflet
    sam sucks

    Braviary
    sam sucks

    Vullaby
    sam sucks

    Mandibuzz
    sam sucks

    Heatmor
    sam sucks

    Durant
    sam sucks

    Deino
    sam sucks

    Zweilous
    sam sucks

    Hydreigon
    sam sucks

    Larvesta
    sam sucks

    Volcarona
    sam sucks

    Cobalion
    sam sucks

    Terrakion
    sam sucks

    Virizion
    sam sucks

    Tornadus
    sam sucks

    Thundurus
    sam sucks

    Reshiram
    sam sucks

    Zekrom
    sam sucks

    Landorus
    sam sucks

    Kyurem
    sam sucks

    Keldeo
    sam sucks

    Meloetta
    sam sucks

    Genesect
    sam sucks

    Chespin
    sam sucks

    Quilladin
    sam sucks

    Chesnaught:
    Cocogo fuck yourself, you look some sludge

    Cocojoe
    Cocogo fuck yourself, you look some sludge

    Fennekin
    sam sucks

    Braixen
    sam sucks

    Delphox
    sam sucks

    Froakie
    sam sucks

    Frogadier
    sam sucks

    Greninja
    sam sucks

    Bunnelby
    sam sucks

    Diggersby
    sam sucks

    Fletchling
    sam sucks

    Fletchinder
    sam sucks

    Talonflame
    sam sucks

    Scatterbug
    sam sucks

    Spewpa
    sam sucks

    Vivillon
    sam sucks

    Litleo
    sam sucks

    Pyroar
    sam sucks

    Flabebe
    sam sucks

    Floette
    sam sucks

    Florges
    sam sucks

    Skiddo
    sam sucks

    Gogoat
    sam sucks

    Pancham
    sam sucks

    Pangoro
    sam sucks

    Furfrou
    sam sucks

    Espurr
    sam sucks

    Meowstic
    sam sucks

    Honedge
    sam sucks

    Doublade
    sam sucks

    Aegislash
    sam sucks

    Spritzee
    sam sucks

    Aromatisse
    sam sucks

    Swirlix
    sam sucks

    Slurpuff
    sam sucks

    Inkay
    sam sucks

    Malamar
    sam sucks

    Binacle
    sam sucks

    Barbaracle
    sam sucks

    Skrelp
    sam sucks

    Dragalge
    sam sucks

    Clauncher
    sam sucks

    Clawitzer
    sam sucks

    Helioptile
    sam sucks

    Heliolisk
    sam sucks

    Tyrunt
    sam sucks

    Tyrantrum
    sam sucks

    Amaura
    sam sucks

    Aurorus
    sam sucks

    Sylveon
    sam sucks

    Hawlucha
    sam sucks

    Dedenne
    sam sucks

    Carbink
    sam sucks

    GOOMY
    Take a look at this face, bitch: http://i.imgur.com/5jxFcH3.jpg Does it look like I give a fuck?

    Sliggoo
    Sliggoo fuck yourself you dumbass duck

    Goodra
    I finally evolved into me in that one rap battle but I never got to rap so here I am dammit I wasted my line

    Klefki
    sam sucks

    Phantump
    sam sucks

    Trevenant
    sam sucks

    Pumpkaboo
    sam sucks

    Gourgeist
    sam sucks

    Bergmite
    sam sucks

    Avalugg
    sam sucks

    Noibat
    sam sucks

    Noivern
    sam sucks

    Xerneas
    sam sucks

    Yvetal
    sam sucks

    Zygarde
    sam sucks

    Diancie
    sam sucks

    Hoopa
    sam sucks

    Volcanion
    sam sucks

    Ash
    I’m pretty sure those are all the important ones anyway
    Btw you’re GAY

    Charles Darwin
    Well ummm… Allow me to show you every single species of anything ever

    Parus major
    Tweet tweet motherfucker

    *shot*

    Oh um

    who wahn
    jews next
    yu decide

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