SPAMBOT: The Battle for Erbohnia

[echo]

Oh my god, loving this so far! c: Great work c:<

[sane]

My character is a demolition expert. I like this.

[Baldy Jr]

So memes. This will be short because I kind of forgot where I wanted to go with this.

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As the battle in Spam Central raged, Dion stood by his superior's bedside.

"My boy," Rob whispered, "I have one last thing to tell you, before I go..."

"Don't talk like that!" Dion cried, "Everything will be alright, you'll be fine!"

"To bring peace to our land, you must.." and then Rob died in the most cliche way possible.

Dion:
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Around the small band of moderators, mechs were closing in from all sides. Polar, being the nimble lil' scamp he is, fluttered around the hulking machines, freezing their guns, portholes, and legs.

As he danced about, he was almost inaudibly muttering to himself, "Let it gooooo, let it goooooooo~"

Back at the Command Center, Noremac gained temporary control of a mech to smack him in the back of the head.

"Stop that, right now." Noremac said.

"Sorry" replied Polar.

Tom was flying around, shooting through mechs like a bullet. He would crash through the side, and tackle the pilot, pulling them through the other side of the robot. It didn't take long, however, until a strong electrical pulse hit him from the side, causing him to crash to the ground.

From an overhead ridge, Brad piloted Spambot Alpha, the largest and most sophisticated of the mechs.

"KEKEKEKEKEKEKE I HAVE YOU NOW, MODERATORS!" he shouted, in a voice similar to Joan Rivers.

"Not on my memes." replied Mancha/PHoENIX/Hawk-Eyed Commiefuck/Whatever his name is or was

He channeled the Supreme Meme, a mystical energy like the Force, but with memes.

"No." replied Brad, who shot him in the chest with his lightning gun thingy.

http://gyazo.com/266afc66c7233205fdd1902f0dc02ae5

This sudden and shocking turn in plot made everyone UPSET!
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Back in a conveniently placed plothole, Gunnut, SBS, and Clemi watched the carnage in horror.

"SACRE BLEU OUI MUST HELP ZEM" said Clemi

"k" said the other two

The menage a trois ran into the battlefield, and not 3 seconds past before Clemi yelled, "WE SURRENDER DON'T HURT US"

The mechs circled them, prepared to shoot them, or explode them, or even, as Clemi feared, take them to the dentist!

Izayoi, unable to bear watching civilians get killed, stood up uneasily.

"Hey, get down, you've already expended too much psychic energy, you'll get hurt!" said Accordion Chick, the field medic.

Ignoring her, Izayoi walked closer to the bots, focusing her psychic powers. She could feel her brain practically melting under the strain, her vision became blurred and tinted.

Finally, a powerful wave of energy exploded outwards from Izayoi, knocking her back, blood pouring from her face.

Every mech in the mile wide radius crumpled like tin foil.

"Oh fuck this" said Brad, before hitting the teleport button on his mech.



Tom, who was still knocked out, was buried under a mountain of sand blown out from the blast.

Polar rushed over to Izayoi, who, to his relief, was still breathing, yet bloody.

"Hey, Izzy, you okay? Those people are okay.." he leaned over to tap her shoulder

"NOOOOOO DONT TOUCH ME D:<<<" she replied.

"Uhm. What. Izayoi, are you okay?"

"THAS NOT MY NAME. POLAR DORK." she said, still laying down.

"Uh, Noremac, you getting all of this?" Polar asked into his headset.

"Yeah, seems like the strain of that blast knocked her mind clean out. She said Izayoi's not her name. Ask her what it is?"

Polar sighed. "Okay.. then what is your name?"

She replied, "HANAKO C': "

"Alright, let's go get you cleaned up and out of here, uh.. Hanako."

"OuO"
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TO BE CONTINUES

[Lancer]

"Not on my memes." replied Mancha/PHoENIX/Hawk-Eyed Commiefuck/Whatever his name is or was

He channeled the Supreme Meme, a mystical energy like the Force, but with memes.

Sig material.

[echo]

Fan fiction is something made up by someone.. you're using real facts on how my name changes work Dumbo D:<

jk, i loved it c: best thing ever 11/5 would give Pulitzer prize to o;

[GonadTheNomad]

More like the suprmeme amirite.

[Baldy Jr]

More like the suprmeme amirite.

I don't get it.

[YellowNerd]

Wow this is great

[Moonjik]

Rebels ftw

#rebel4life

[Baldy Jr]

New dialogue format, to make it easier to write and read.

SPAM CENTRAL
1 HOUR PAST BATTLE

BRAD: In one move, they took out a quarter of our invasion forces, and the resulting sandstorm has blocked out our communication signals. We have the numbers, but how do we expect to combat psychic powers and other superhero crap?

SPARTICA4REAL: Last I heard, that psychic wave turned Izayoi retarded or something.

BRAD: Great, now we only have TEN superpowered demi-gods to worry about. Great. Thank you.

SPARTICA4REAL: Hey, you still have me and Up, that counts for something, right?

BRAD: Yeah, we have a shapeshifter and… what do you even do, again?

SPARTICA4REAL: I can turn invisible. I can be really sneaky and stuff.

BRAD: Hey! That’s actually semi useful! I want you and Uprising to meet with Nate and Adonis at Noitu Lover.

SPARTICA4REAL: What does that even mean?

BRAD: *shrug*
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SPAM CENTRAL DESERT
45 MINUTES PAST BATTLE

Tom woke up, surrounded by darkness. He tried to take a deep breath, but sand poured into his nose. What happened? He remembered getting shot out of the air, but after that, his mind went blank. He shot himself out of the sand dune burying him, and was immediately hit in the eyes with swirling gusts of sand. Little did he know, this particular sandstorm was one of the largest recorded natural disasters in Spam Central history, dwarfed only by the Creamer Incident of ’45. He yelled into the storm;

“Hey guys? Polar? Izzy? …Anyone?”

It was no use, his team had forgotten him.
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MOD SECTION
5 MINUTES BEFORE BATTLE

SAMBAMA: We’ve settled the details for Rob’s funeral. Is there anything else you need?

DION: I’m going to be very busy running things as the new Owner of Erbohnia. There’s currently an invasion of Spam Central. I’m promoting you to Admin, and giving you control of the Army.
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SPAM CENTRAL BASE ALPHA
4 HOURS PAST BATTLE

The Commanding Officer of the Spam Central Division Task Force glanced over his report one final time. According to PolarBore, both Tom and PhoENIX were Missing In Action. He could not confirm whether they were alive or dead. He also was informed one of his most important fellow Moderators, Izayoi, excuse him, Hanako, has been indefinitely injured. He figured he’d give her a visit. She’s… very important to him.

He walked into the medical bay, and headed towards the first bed to the right. He hadn’t spoken to her since before the Invasion, and he was scared she wouldn’t remember him.

“HISAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! C;”
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NOITU LOVER
3 HOURS PAST BATTLE

ADONIS: Sir, Uprising and Spartica are here to see you.

NATE: Send them in.

UPRISING & SPARTICA4REAL: Sir.

NATE: Gentlemen! Good to see you. As you’ve already been told, you two have a special skillset we require.

UPRISING: Yeah, but we didn’t get any details.

NATE: You see, Rob has passed away recently. Dion is the new Owner of Erbohnia.

SPARTICA4REAL: And?

NATE: And, Sambama has been promoted to Administrator. Your job, Spartica, is to assassinate Dion and Sambama. Uprising, you will impersonate Sambama, and take control of the Kingdom.
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TO BE CONTINUES