Ronald:
Here comes Micky D to serve up some fries
Micky D's is a nickname fore McDonald's. Fries are used as "burns" or "insults" in this context.
I flow like soda and I'm gonna rise
Soda rises...
This McChicken will get flattened by my big shoe size
McChicken is the chicken served at McDonald's and he's basically calling Simmons a chicken. Ronald is a clown, so he wold have huge shoes.
I'll watch you get mauled by my pom-pom guys
The Fry Kids are characters sometimes painted on Play Place walls at McDonald's.
We're the Happy Meal Gang and you're a fitness nerd
The Happy meal Gang are basically McDonald's characters.
And smiles aren't the only things that we're gonna serve
Happy Meals are marketed to serve up smiles, and Ronald is saying that he's gonna "serve" Richard.
While you're sweatin' to the oldies 'till you start to pant
Sweatin' to the Oldies is a fitness series by Simmons.
The only meat you're hungry for is the one in man pants
Ronald is accusing Richard Simmons of loving dick and being gay because of his flamboyant actions.
You're a flop, Richie...you move like Wacko Jacko
"Flop" as in a failure and "flop" as in flipping burger patties. Wacko Jacko is a popular image of a creepy Michael Jackson face (look it up on Google images), so he's saying that Richard moves like a retarded version of Michael Jackson.
I make bigger cash, bigger asses, and with a better Afro
Ronald makes more money, makes people have bigger butts due to McDonald's foods being fattening, and has a better fro than Simmons, who has a little Afro.
Slide into my Play Place, and have a snack, bro
The Play Place is the playground inside of the restaurants and usually has slides.
'Cause like Katrina I blow Louisianian assholes
Richard is from New Orleans. Hurricane Katrina blew away a large portion of Louisiana. By blow asshole in this context, though, he's saying that his food will give him diarrhea and blow his asshole.
Richard:
Step to the right then step to the left
Then tie a noose around your neck
Simmons giving directions for exercise like in his DVDs and, for Ronald, telling him to kill himself.
'Cause I make people feel the best
[b]Part of Simmons' marketing is making people "feel the best".
The world is better without your jest
Without McDonald's, we would probably see less fat people.
You fatten fuckers up, while I keep a working beat
In his dance videos, Richard directs choreography to a beat. He's saying he can keep a beat in a rap battle.
I'm the MC of DVDs, so Sit Tight in your seat
One of the Richard Simmons fitness DVDs is Sit Tight. he's telling Ronald to sit down.
Why have a charity house if you still kill consumers
Richard is bringing forth the irony of having a charity house (the Ronald McDonald House) if McDonald's food kills people.
With shitty-ass food and fake meat rumors?
McDonald's uses fake meat.
You can't simmer the Simmons, you creepy man
I'll beat a failure like your game in Japan
He's calling Ronald a failure and saying he can beat a failure like he can beat the Japanese video game starring Ronald (it exists) which he also considers a failure.
Your role is marketing, while I'm a role model
And I still prefer Wendy's to Rosie O' Donald's
He says he prefers eating at Wendy's, another fast food restaurant, than eating at "Rosie O' Donald's", making fun of McDonald's making people fat. Rossie O' Donnell is a famous female personality who is considered obese and Richard has even appeared on her show before.
Ronald:
You're famous for Fish Hooks and dressing like Borat
Fish Hooks is a Disney Channel show in which Simmons voices a character. Borat is a movie character that dresses in a green banana hammock. Don't look up that picture, please. Ew.
You'd snap like a toothpick, baby, you need more fat
Simmons is skinny.
Fitness expert? How are you still alive?
Most "fitness experts" use fad diets and fail at their job.
Put down the tank top 'cause you're SIXTY-FUCKING-FIVE
Simmons wears tank tops a lot. He's also sixty five years old, which is old.
Richard:
You think I dress funny? Look in the mirror
I'm not the one in this battle that dresses like a queer
Richard Simmons' clothing is usually skimpy and revealing, so people would associate him with being gay. He's saying that Ronald McDonald dresses gayer because he's a clown.
You'll never be macho with that attitude, punk
And I can exercise at this age 'cause I don't eat your junk
Once again, McDonald's food makes you fat. This could also be considered a gay joke but...eh.
Tao of Blue
Originally Posted by NiceChristina
and I'm always open to suggestions!
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