Episode Three: Friendship is magic!
King of all Cosmos: WELL HELLOOOOOOOOOOOO EVURYBOODY
Counter-Terrorist: Wow what a fgt.
OK, This battle is getting boring. SEND IN... the bronies.
Counter-Terrorist: OH GOD NO
Bishop: The.. what?
The gates opened.
HERE THEY ARE! Vicious beast, hair all over their faces, bright, pink t-shirts, and.. PONY-tails! SAY HELLO TO THE BROOOONIES. Now go get 'em.
Bishop: Quick! Get to high ground! They're to fat to climb!
Jaina, Bishop, The Counter-Terrorist and Red Ranger climbed to high ground. To the top of the basketball stands. Which turned into a Tokyo Neighbourhood. Stands became sky-scrapers, walls became flashy ads, and the floor turned to concrete.
LISTEN UP, GLADIATORS. Whoever kills the most bronies, gets a special prize from yours truly. AND IT'S A DARN GOOD ONE. COMMENCE THE MASSACRE.
Kanye was in front of the gates. He grabbed his bat
Kanye: Ay I haven't seen so many retarded fans since my concert in Europe.
20 blood-thirsty bronies threw themselves at Kanye
Kanye:
You seek out problems
*Bam*
Looking for trouble
*Bam*
Trouble
*Bam*
Trouble
*Slam*
But you found it motherfucker
*Brony decapitation*
BUY KANYE'S NEW ALBUM "SO HELP ME GOD" WITH SONGS INCLUDING "LOOKING FOR TROUBLE" IN STORES NEAR YOU. OUT NOW! *ahem*
Kanye brony count: 20 BRONIES! High-score! Let's see how the others will handle it!
Kanye: Best take a lesson from Yeezy
You're missing your head, stupid brony-eezy
Metal Sonic was behind a sky-scraper, and he saw a brony army that passed him. Accelerating, he jumped into a flashy ad, bouncing off it, and hitting the brony-army head on
*ding*
18 kills
He bounced back again, hitting another brony group
*ding*
25 kills
With one last charge, he went after the big brony, the leader. However, he was stopped. Apparently the Brony Leader was a fat fuck. Sonic bounced back from his belly
*ding*
Wall
*ding*
Building
*ding*
Weird Japanese statue
*ding*
Sonic got up, dizzy as fuck.
IMPRESSIVE! 106 BRONY KILLS!
Metal Sonic stood up straight. All planned.
Shaquille O'Neal was dribbling through entire crowds of bronies. He was so caught up in the game, he forgot that the bronies are actually blood-thirsty man-zombies with no sense of social structure and no friends. Actually he was so caught up in the game he forgot there was no game.
Shaq: Ok, gotta get past that guy, pass, intercept, then shoot for the win.
But he ran into some trouble. Big fat Brony-Leader trouble.
Brony Leader took his ball and popped it. Then he stared him in the face.
Brony Leader: WHO IS THE BEST PONY?
Shaquille: Uhh.. Applejack?
Brony Leader: WRONG!
The leader grabbed him with two arms, and held him above his head
Brony Leader: THIS MAN CLAIMS APPLEJACK IS THE BEST PONY. SHOW HIM THE TRUTH.
Shaq: NO! NOOOO!
The Leader tossed Shaq into a group of bronies, who took him away whilst singing the Friendship is Magic theme song
Shaq: NO! I DON'T WANT TO WATCH THAT SHIT! NOOOOO! NOT THE MLP FORUMS! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
FOURTH DEATH: SHAQ
OUCH. That has to be worse than dying. Anyway, everyone knows Rainbow Dash is the best. Ahem, moving on.
The King of all Cosmos made good of his word and in fact, made a party. Bronies were dancing all around, to the sweet sounds of the Katamari Damacy soundtrack.
Bard saw him, but thought the bronies attacked the King of All Cosmos, and rushed to save him. Upon reaching the middle of the party, he saw Bishop on top of a building. He was holding a grenade.
OHOHO WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT. MR BISHOP WANTS TO KILL 218 BIRDS WITH ONE STONE.
Bishop: Yipiee-Kye-Yay, motherfucker
OH THAT'S SO COOL.
Bard had no time to save the King of All Cosmos. Or the Bronies. Just himself. *Zhonya*
The explosion was huge. Brony blood everywhere, bits and pieces flying all over the place. However, in the middle, stood two people. Bard, because he used Zhonya, and The King of all Cosmos. Why? Because he's the king of all Cosmos, silly.
The King of All Cosmos got up and grabbed Bishop: That was not nice. BUT YOU ARE FORGIVEN, WHO WANTS POPCORN?
Bard hummed a sad tune.. he was unable to save..
216 BRONIES! I THINK WE HAVE A WINNER! However, there are still 200 and.. 17 bronies? But it would be such a cliche for someone to just SWOOP in and take the prize, wouldn't it?
Skarmony was ready. This time, it would be his moment. No more flinching. He got ready to fly..
AND HE DID. FULL HP, AND READY TO KICK SOME BRONY BUTT.
He plunged into the brony army, claws and beak fighting, and came out without a scratch. He flew to Deadpool's stand and dropped the Brony Leader's head in front of him.
YIKES. WE HAVE A WINNEEEER. SKARMOOOONY. Here is your prize! A NEW PAIR OF BOOTS! What? You can't wear boots? WELL FUCK YOU THEN!
Skarmony was pissed. He went claws first into Wade's balls, making him fall into the Arena.
Deadpool: Oh.. hehehe.. hi guys.. no hard feelings right?
The contestants gathered around him.
Water Elemental: OH HI MR WILSON I'M A HUGE FAN.
Deadpool: So you all want my blood heh? WELL NOT TODAY BITCHES.
Deadpool did a somersault, and landed behind them, taking out his UZIs.
DEADPOOL JOINS THE BATTLE.
Deadpool: Now let's have some fun!
Suddenly, a high-pitched alarm sound was heard throughout the arena.
King of all Cosmos: SOUNDS LIKE A PAAARTYYYY
WARNING. MISSLE LAUNCH DETECTED.
Deadpool: Well then.
To be continued..
Originally Posted by Jack Cossack
Bon Vivant of Violet
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