I bet Skarmory flinched.
I bet Skarmory flinched.
Gonad has no nads pass it on!!!!11!Spoiler:
Yeah probablyOriginally Posted by Nightwing
Spoiler:
I am PolarBore's official Assistant Mangager (again)
Chapter Eight: A likely death
Meta Dion walked up the stairs, when suddenly, a figure appeared before him. It was the ghost of his friend, Professor Layton.
Meta Dion: Layton?! How the..
Layton: Dion!
Meta Dion: How are you here?
Layton: I bribed Deadpool with some.. indecent magazines, and he let me visit a person from the physical world. But don't mind that, I came here because I finally realized it. Booker was right! Bigby was right! We were wrong about being nice, we were wrong about being indifferent. When we take matters into our own hands, we become responsible for ourselves and we honor people who want to battle! We won a VGBR, but we won it by being assholes and not fighting anyone. Do it, Dion! Go out there, and fight. And if you fall, I'll be waiting there for you to tell me all about how you kicked ass. See you, friend! Go kick some ass for TEAM FRIENDSHIP!
Layton smiled, then his ghost disappeared. Meta-Dion was left dumbfounded in the middle of the castle hall. He looked at his banhammer. Layton was right. Meta-Dion smiled, then put on his Meta-Knight helmet and stormed out of the castle.
Lester locked in Geralt, who was picking some flowers in the courtyard. A witcher's got to have his herbs, right? Lester raised the sword-feather above his head, and charged towards Geralt.
Lester: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Jaina was walking through the courtyard, looking for a potential foe.
???: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
The scream was heard from the other side of the courtyard, and she wasn't the only one who heard it. A beautiful, white dog jumped out of the bush when she heard the war cry, and bumped into Jaina. The sorceress was startled, and used the first card she could find.
Water Elemental: OH MY GOD HI MISTRESS I'VE MISSED OH MY THIS PLACE IS SO NICE I LOVE IT!
Jaina and Amaterasu both got up. Jaina was studying her opponent. It was obviously Amaterasu, the Japanese sun goddess. Jaina knew she needed to tread carefully..
Water Elemental: WOW SUCH A CUTE DOGGY!
Water Elemental rushed to Amaterasu and picked her up, petting her.
Water Elemental: IT'S SO FLUFFY!
Now, Amaterasu was indeed a sun goddess, but even goddesses need petting once in a while, right? Also, she did not recognize Jaina as an enemy. Her soul was pure, even though it burned with hatred for those she wished to take revenge on.
Amaterasu jumped from the Water Elemental (COME BACK FLUFFY) and headed over to Jaina. She looked her in the eyes, and bowed her head.
Jaina: Amaterasu, I am honored to ally myself with you, but know that when the time comes, I shall have to go through you to finish what I started.
Amaterasu: Woof!
Jaina: I'm glad we agree.
Bigby was walking over to Bard and Satoshi, who saw him approaching.
Satoshi: Careful, Bard. I know you're a cosmic being and whatnot, but he looks dangerous.
Bigby approached them, then eyed them both.
Satoshi was getting pretty scared, but was holding his ground: Look, we're not afraid of you! Think you can take us both?
He looked at Bigby from head to toe. Powerful being, calm, but easily angered. Don't show him your true colours.
Bard was emotionless, but the Meeps were getting riled up. Bigby stared at him and the Meeps. He found the whole thing pretty humorous.
Bigby: Look, I don't know what you can do *he pointed at Satoshi*, but I know what Bard can do, and let's face it, you're not the strongest competitors here. Bard, you chose to save yourself this time, instead of helping others. I respect that, a protector should know when it's right to save his own ass. I suggest you two be careful, there are a lot of bloodthirsty people here, who would step over your dead bodies just to get closer to winning.
???: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Bigby: Perfect way to get my point across.
He took out a Huff'n'Puff, and lit it. Satoshi was eyeing him, while Bard showed his best resting-bitch-face.
Bigby turned around, then walked in another direction. He turned his head towards them.
Bigby: Next time we meet, I might not be as friendly.
He huffed, and he puffed, and then walked away, deeper into the courtyard.
Geralt was studying the flora of the courtyard. It wasn't like any other he'd seen. Strange. He picked up a weird pixelated flower. Then he saw Skarmory's body, and he approached it.
Geralt: The death is fresh, 5-6 minutes. Death by repeated stabbing. I think -
Lester: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Geralt turned around with lighting-fast reflexes, as Lester failed his charge and plummeted face-down in the dirt. He quickly got back up. Geralt was looking at him. His arms were crossed, and he didn't even draw his sword.
Lester: DIE!
Geralt: Look, kid, calm down. You'll only get hurt.
Lester swung at the Witcher, who calmly sidestepped his attack.
Geralt: I already prevented your death two times. Swing a third time and you won't be so lucky. Walk away.
Lester: SHUT UP NERD
Geralt sighed, and sketched a symbol with his hands. Lester madly charged again at Geralt.
The sign Geralt had sketched was Quen, a protective sign, that for an experienced Witcher would also reflect any damage that the sign protects. Lester.. did not know that. He charged and jumped at Geralt, swinging the sword-feather at Geralt's head, only to be stopped by the Quen. The sign reflected the force of the attack in such a manner that Lester simply imploded upon hitting the shield, covering Geralt in a mess of guts.
After the impact, only a pair of glasses stood where Lester once was. For a crazy teenager, beating a Witcher was pretty.. unlikely.
THIRD DEATH: Lester The Unlikely
Geralt sighed as he wiped his clothes from what remained of his "adversary".
Satoshi looked at Bard: You ready for all the bloodthristy psychos?
Ironically, that's the time Trevor in a dress decided to strike. He grabbed Satoshi from the back, and was choking him.
Trevor: Hey there pretty boy, whatcha say about psychos?
Satoshi tried using Trevor's own body-weight, 84 kilograms to be exact, against him, but to no avail.
Satoshi: Ahh.. uhh.. Bard.. HELP!
Bard decided the best course of action.. was to fuck with Trevor. He jumped in the air, and did some MAGICAL twirls and MAGICAL moves in the air, leaving a MAGICAL trail of MAGICAL dust.
Trevor dropped Satoshi: What the fuck.. is this shit? Hooooly fuck I must be high as a kite right now.
Satoshi took advantage of Bard's lightshow, then tackled Trevor to the ground. Knowing he's surely packing heat, and that if brute force failed, he will definitely pull out his gun, Satoshi took his pistol, then quickly pointed it at him. A nutcase like Trevor won't be scared of that, but Satoshi needed the edge.
Trevor: Oh, you are going to be FUCKING sorry you FUCKED with me, you FUCKING pussies.
Bard answered with another emotionless face, as the Meeps where getting pumped.
Mega Man tried un-sticking himself from the Maple Syrup, when Meta-Dion, with his helmet on, came back from the castle.
Mega Man: Tired of running away?
Meta-Dion: Yes. I hope you don't mind it, we have to fight to the death now.
Mega Man: You're on!
Meta-Dion doused his Banhammer in Maple Syrup, and was ready for the battle that would change him from peaceful monster to a pretty nice but violent dude.
Turtlesauce: I'd love to write the epic bout between Meta-Dion and Mega Man, but I'm passing this one to my man, Ranger. See ya next time, guys!
Last edited by Turtlesauce; 10-29-2015 at 01:17 PM.
Chapter Nine: Meta vs Mega
Geralt wiped the blood off of himself, looking down at the mess that used to be called Lester. Well, now he had one less foe to deal with.
“Well, aren’t you brutal?” He turned around to find a quartet of opponents: Jaina, the one speaking, Water Elemental, who was riding Amaterasu, greatly annoying the wold, and Leper Gnome, who coughed.
“I see you decided to team up. Wise idea.” He picked up the glasses and threw them towards the four, making it silently clear that they belonged to the last person to attack him.
“I can barely see through these!” Water Elemental had picked them up and tried them on, gleefully saying the aforementioned and ruining any sort of tension that may have been there. Jaina glared at him, but the Elemental didn’t seem to notice.
“So, do you still wish to fight?” Geralt challenged. Amaterasu growled and lowered her stance, but Jaina held out a hand to hold her back. She instead pointed at the Leper Gnome, who pointed at himself, and groaned at Jaina’s nod. He walked up to Geralt, sword unsheathed and shield at the ready. Geralt similarly unsheathed his sword, and braced as the Leper Gnome yelled. It ran forward, sword aloft, and tried to bring it down upon Geralt’s stomach (that was the area of the body he could best reach). The Witcher effortlessly parried, and then turned it around so that the tip of his blade was a foot away from the back of the Gnome, having just pierced it.
“Is that really your be-” The Gnome exploded, showering Geralt in a vile, green substance which mixed in with the red goop of Lester the Unlikely’s insides. He spat out a bit that got in his mouth. Luckily, his resistance to the toxicity of his own poison negated any damage that it could’ve done, with the exception of the slight blast damage.
“Oh, you want more?” Jaina said, following on from the opponent’s cut short sentence. “Water Elemental, clean him up.” The minion looked at her, sadly. She sighed. “I mean attack.” The face of the aqua being lit up as he sped towards the Witcher.
Trevor started to storm towards Satoshi. The Corpse Party founder fired off a shot, but he was unused to the recoil, resulting in it jerking up and the bullet flying past Trevor’s shoulder. He continued onwards, unphased, until Bard stepped in front of him.
“Out of my way, lard lump!” He punched Bard straight in the chest. Bard barely felt it, being more accustomed to being attacked by supernaturally charged attacks, blades, and so on. But it still registered with him that it was a somewhat powerful blow for a normal person, and he was a defender. He waved his arm, signalling Satoshi.
“You don’t really mean that?” Satoshi protested. Bard turned his head around, and nodded, all the while Trevor was punching and kicking Bard with no obvious effect. His meeps waved at Satoshi. “Best of luck, Bard.” Satoshi had to play it conservatively. Trevor, unlike him, had a huge arsenal, and he didn’t have any route of psychological attack, meaning he couldn’t do much, especially with how the gun failed him a moment ago. And so, he left the Wandering Caretaker alone, to fight with the psychopath. Bard turned back to Trevor, who was showing no sign of stopping or tiring. Bard simply punched him, and he was immediately knocked backwards (it was a powerful hit, but it wasn’t a critical).
“Oh, so you’re tough, all of a sudden?” Trevor stood up, and pulled out-
“Ok, f**k it, I give up.” Ranger burst in on the commentary. “That guy just pulled a rocket launcher from his ass! How?” It wasn’t exactly a rocket launcher, but it was close. It had the outward appearance of one, but seemed to be made out of cheap metal tubing, several cardboard tubes, and the explosive at the end was emblazoned with the red, white, and blue of the American flag.
“F**king eat this!” Bard was backing away slowly, but when Trevor launched the firework he turned around, and used Magical Journey to get through the hedge of the maze. The firework exploded against the hedge, setting fire to it. “Oh, so you’re being a pussy? Well guess what? I...ergh, what the f**k?” Trevor had his head down, trying to fit in another firework, but when he put his head up again the passage had vanished. Looks like he would have to go searching for Bard. Or just wait for the hedge to burn a hole, as it seemed to be catching.
Mega Man started the duel, by sending three of his pellets towards Meta Dion. The fusion fighter took this in his stride, jumping over and unsheathing Galactia, Meta Knight’s iconic lightning sword. He swung, just catching the top of Mega Man’s helmet as he ducked, causing sparks to fly. Dion looked down, to see a glowing Mega Buster in his face. The charged shot blew him back as Mega Man followed up with a slide kick, Mega Upper, and then Air Man’s tornado, sending Meta Dion high into the ceiling. Dion shook himself off on the journey down, before spreading his wings, gliding down as Mega Man ran on the floor, trying to keep up. The android threw several Metal Blades up in the air, at where Meta Dion was, but he was always too slow, the gliding menace managing to either outspeed it or make a sharp enough dive so to dodge the blade. He retracted his wings, falling a much shorter distance to the floor, but putting all of the force onto the pointing-down sword, directly over Mega Man. He threw up another blade, but it just chinked off of the sword. Mega Man ran, just missing the sword coming down upon him. Dion tried to lift it up to continue a combo, but found it stuck firmly in the ground. Mega Man took advantage of this, sending a Crash Bomb that latched onto the sword as Meta Dion was trying to yank it up. It exploded, again damaging Dion and sending him flying backwards. Mega Man was charging towards him, Atomic Fire selected and charging up. Dion thought quickly, grabbing and throwing his secret weapon: Maple syrup. It was effective immediately, with Mega Man stumbling as his foot was unexpectedly frozen in place, the fireball misfiring and simply colliding with the floor. Meta Dion took out his maple syrup coated banhammer, and slowly approached the struggling android. Mega Man tried his power pellets, but Dion simply deflected them with the handle of the hammer. He tried creating a door and slamming it upon where Dion was, but when the door disappeared there was no Canadian star warrior underneath. Mega Man turned as prompted by a noise, and saw that he had used Meta Knight’s cape to get out of the way. As Meta Knight raised the hammer, Mega Man tried one final weapon. His entire armour turned a shade of purple, with the sole exception of his chestpiece, which turned a lime green. He raised his arm cannon, and just as the hammer was about to be lowered, he fired. A violently green gas spewed out, which caused Dion to lower the hammer, coughing, but only for a couple of seconds.
“Heh.” Meta Dion picked up the hammer again, with Mega Man knowing he had no way of countering in time. “Heh...heh…” While he had winced at the seemingly inevitable death, Mega Man opened his eyes to see Meta Dion laughing, slowly at first, but gradually increasing to a full on belly laugh, dropping his banhammer all together. But unlike the original gas, its effects soon wore off, with Meta Dion coughing one last time as the final bits of Joker Gas wore off. “Now, where was-” He looked down to find that his banhammer was now stuck in the maple syrup, and then up to find that Mega Man’s colours had changed. “Ah-”
Fourth Death:- Meta Dion
“Metal Blade to the face. Nasty.” Ranger commented, as Mega Man looked at his new weapon, which gave him a red and white suit (with his chestpiece being white except a maple leaf-shaped red spot, of course). He knew what it would do just from it’s name: Syrup Slick.
Bigby exhaled smoke as he removed his cigarette from his mouth, dropping it and stamping it out. Even though the stench of the smoke, he could clearly smell...decay? He was at the entrance of Parfum Palace, and the door had some sort of black substance, covering the entirety of it, and dripping onto the floor. He walked towards it, tilting his head. He stopped, but only to take out another Huff and Puff. The stench was becoming more than he could bear. He lit it, allowed the smoke to smother his olfactory sense. He leant up besides it, reaching out his hand. He immediately jerked it away as he could feel it start to burn. Due to Fables being much more resilient than normal humans, it didn’t burn right through him, however it did leave a nasty red burn.
“Now what the hell could cause this?” He mused aloud. Something startled him, causing him to step back: A body seemed to be emerging. He took two more backwards as the SCP, who had up until now been waiting in his private, personal dimension, waiting for someone to come along. He smiled, and reached out, wanting to kill Bigby in a way that Lester had deprived him from. “Alright, I don’t know what you are, but your decaying has put me in a bad mood. Either get lost, or be prepared of the consequences.” The SCP didn’t slow down. “Well, at least you don’t waste time.”
A few meters back, hidden from the SCP and the sheriff, was Satoshi. He knew these two were out of his league, and Bigby made it clear what he would do next time they met. He weighed the gun in his hand. He doubted the bullets were made of silver, so the most he could do was bluff if confronted. Still, he decided to watch how this played out. Maybe it could give him some additional info as to how these two worked.
Finally! Awesome episode!
R.I.P. Meta Dion, i'm sure Layton will be happy to see him again q.q
Chapter 10: What a fucking killjoy.
Water Elemental charged at Geralt.
A ballista fired, and almost hit Jaina. She looked at her opponent, and noticed the Witcher had cards as well.
-That, is the power of Gwent. - he then shoved Water elemental out of the way with an Aard sign.
Meanwhile, Mekgineer Thermaplug charged at the ballista. Two bolts were fired at him, one missed, while the other one impaled
him. The legendary minion carried on however, and smashed the siege weapon and its operator into smithereens. A Leper Gnome appeared next to the Mekgineer.
Jaina casted a secret spell. Geralt, not familiar with the Secret mechanics, Just played his Thaler card.
Thaler, the head of Temerian intelligence, corrected his monocle.
"Fuck off! We aren't all ploughin' philanderers. Some of us have depth..." - and he joined Jaina. It was all according to plan though. He was a master spy, and by the power of espionage (I guess), two cards appeared in Geralt's hand.
Interestingly enough, a Thaler also appeared next to Geralt, and gave Jaina two cards. That is sort of a waste of Mirror Entity if you ask me.
Then, the Thaler sitting on Geralt's side got blown up by the Leper Gnome. he was blown back, smashed his face into the ground, and even though he could have lived, the poison finished the job.
Geralt in meantime, dodged Jaina's Fireball, and played another card - Inpenetrable Fog, which took effect instantly, and affected the immediate Jaina-Geralt combat arena.
"Fog's thick as a curdled milk" - Geralt said.
"Never took you for a poet" - Jaina replied.
"Oh, but I am one. Wanna hear a limerick?"
"Sure."
"Jaina, Jaina, what a prick"
Anyways, he took use of the low visibility, tuned his senses towards the Mekgineer, and then charged towards him.
Geralt's attack caught Mekgineer off-guard. He struck him once before Mekgineer punched Geralt off. Geralt was thrown back and his Quen shielf was gone, but not before it rebounded some of the damage to Jaina's minion.
He stood back up, dodged next blow from the Mekgineed, then had his blow blocked. He then noticed the ballista bolt was still inside. An Igni sign set the bolt aflame, and the fire later spread to the Mekgineer.
Then, they played another card - we can't quite see what they was - the fog. What we do know however, is that Mekgineer was finished off by Geralt.
"What up, Geralt, still salty after dying to Freeman?"
"You fall so short... and still get fall damage."
"You so can't into space."
As it turns out, it's a Mirror Image spell Jaina played. Two Jainas appeared next to her, and were taunting Geralt. And he, quite reliably, appeared to fight them.
Bard was hiding from Trevor. Trevor...was a dangerous man, not to be underestimated. He saw a lot of fog in the distance, and decided to go there.
Trevor, in meantime, found his Hot Rod Blazer after the maze fragment burned down...in a blaze. Yeah. I went there, ranger.
Trevor got onto his machine. It was an ATV. With a body rebuilt into a more hot-roddish one. With a V8 engine swap. AND, with a flame paintjob. everyone loves flame paintjobs. He pulled some Molotov cocktails (out of his ass too). To fit the theme. And because he just liked flames.
Bard got close to the foggy area, and noticed a sleeping dog. Amaterasu, she could not see the fight anymore, and with her rather short attention span, just went to sleep. Bard felt some calm aura of goodness emanating from the heaven's illumination, as that's what the goddess's name meant. Might be someone nice to befriend.
Bigby and SCP-106 were still fighting. The Fable was quick to notice the Foundation escapee was all covered in that decaying mucus burning through everything. Now, no ranged weaponry meant he could not harm SCP directly, so he ripped the door of its frame and slammed it into the scip. It had little to no effect.
106 did not focus too much on the fight. He had a feeling.
Time to do some huffing and puffing - Bigby thought, and blew a gust of air towards 106. The windy current blew most of the mucus away from 106's body, leaving him open to attack (until he secretes the corrosive layer back, that is)
106 paid no attention to that. He had a very peculiar feeling, he felt more fun was nearby.
Bigby then grabbed the anomaly, and slammed it into the ground. 106 hit it with the full impact, and realised, it could not hold on forever, if it wants to live. Also it did not like sun. It sunk into the ground to hide.
"Now, no use hiding from me. This palace could be even made out of bricks, but I will catch you. The nose..."
"...knows?" - Turtle asked
"...can smell you out." - Bigby finished his sentence.
"What you said..." - Ranger quipped - "...is stupid. And rips off Death Battle."
Bigby inhaled some of the repugnant smell. Some of the sources, he was already used to. Sorta. He still wanted to drown it out with a smoke, but he could separate old sources...from a new one. Just a few meters from where he was now.
He followed the trail, and noticed a decay portal in the bushes.
"Hmph." - Bigby wolf got into the portal. He found himself in what seemed like another world.
In a distance, he noticed another contestant in the distance. It was Satoshi Mochida, looking around the place, frantic. Bigby closed the distance between them, and pinned Satochi.
"I told you to be careful. Give me one reason not to kill you."
"Y-y-y-you... will not survive without me here."
"Huh?"
"This, is SCP-106's pocket dimension."
"Whose dimension?"
"The rotting guy's dimension. He is essentially a god here, capable of changing all the laws governing reality."
"And what can a scrawny guy like you do to protect me?"
"Well, I read his game's wiki. I know his behaviour. I know how he attacks. Most importantly, I know where the exit is."
...
Bigby Wolf sighed.
"Alright. Lead the wa-" And the hole formed below him. He fell through it and hit the floor with a loud thump somewhere in the Parfum Palace.
SCP-106 looked at Satochi. He, he's got the knowledge. Should be more fun than other chumps. And, he's the right age.
Sure, The Old Man could seal off the exit. Sure he could. But, where's the fun in that? Let's see how far that knowledge gets you, huh?
Satochi realised he had to do this alone, with no back-up. Alright, a D-class can do it without a gun, and he won't be declassed by a random prisoner guinea pig, right? He went right towards the corridor with an exit, and then run through it, when the skip popped through the hole. The adrenaline was pumping in Satoshi, and he jumped through the 106. Then, he noticed, exit did not get closer. The farther he run, the farther the exit was, in fact. It was 106's doing, of course. Gotta distract it
He pulled out his pistol, took a careful aim, and fired at SCP-106. The bullet did hit 106, but did not really do much - it did not even distract it. 106 manipulated the corridor, to close the distance between it and Mochida.
"Quick, gotta think of a plan" - he thought intensely, trying to escape a long and horrific death. He exhausted every possible plan. But, he had an idea, that might just work. He pulled the trigger again.
...
"What a fucking killjoy" - SCP thought, looking at the entry wound in Satoshi's temple. He quickly dumped his body in the usual place - the pond.
Fourth death: Satoshi Mochida
Mega Man thought about the possible applications of the Syrup Slick, when he heard a thump nearby. Might be a nice time to test them out. He got out of the room he was in and followed the sound. He spotted a big huffinpuffin wolf.
"Get out of my way" Bigby said, while thinking about the stench he'll have to scrub out of his fur "I'm in a bad mood already, and I don't need a little robot boy trying to fight me"
The blue bomber responded by trapping Bigby in some maple syrup.
Bigby Wolf sighed, and got himself out of the puddle, after considerable effort. And after a Mega Upper to the face.
RIP Satoshi, but I would've done the same lmao.
Also RIP Mega Man.
Chapter 11: Discarded
Trevor was roaming around in his ATV, throwing Molotov Cocktails wherever he could.
Trevor: WOOOHOOOOHOOO HAHAHAHHHAAA
Then, he heard movement behind him, the turned around and saw a dark shadow.
Trevor: What the fuck?
He stopped the ATV, and got off.
SCP 106 appeared from his ATV and whispered: "Trevor..."
Trevor whispered, mocking SCP: Yes... master...
SCP-106 does not understand sarcasm, and looked confused.
Trevor: Well? C'mon, hit me!
SCP 106: Kneel.
Trevor nodded, then he bent over to kneel, then suddenly leaned in and head-butted SCP, who dropped to the floor.
Trevor: FIGHT ME LIKE A MAN!
SCP 106 slithered into the ground. Trevor felt his forehead. The corrosive substance was eating away at his skin, but he didn't care.
Trevor: AAAAARGH! COULD SOMEONE FUCKING FIGHT ME FOR A CHANGE? DO I LOOK LIKE A FUCKING BITCH TO YOU?
Trevor clenched his fists. Rampage time.
Bigby got up and snarled.
Bigby: I hope you know you're very annoyi-
Mega Man jumped and punched The Sheriff of Woodlands again, following up with a dash attack, leaving Bigby motionless, on the ground. Then, he looked up, and jumped, feeling very excited that he bested this foe. Oh boy!
Something growled behind him. Oh.. boy..
Mega Man turned around to catch a glimpse of Bigby pouncing on him, slashing him.
Meep!
Bard threw out his cosmic binding, stunning Bigby as Amaterasu jumped, tackling The Big Bad Wolf off of Mega Man.
Bigby grabbed Amaterasu and threw her away: Grrr... You just crossed the damn line..
Geralt slashed away at the the two Jainas, with the real one slipping away.
Geralt side-stepped a fireball, then stabbed a Jaina in the heart, then used Quen to dodge the other Jaina's frostbolt, as he decapitated her with one sweep. Geralt had no time to celebrate, because the Water Elemental snuck up behind Geralt, and smashed him to bits.
Water Elemental: OH MY GOD I'M SO SORRY!
The Impenetrable Fog cleared.
Nothing was left except Jaina, Geralt, and the Elemental. No more cards.
Jaina: So I assume that was a Geralt Card, and nothing more.
Geralt nodded.
Water Elemental: OH THANK GOODNESS!
Geralt: Listen, Jaina, we don't have to do this.
Jaina: I never took you for a coward, Witcher.
Geralt: Don't mistake morality for cowardice, Witch.
Water Elemental: Ooooh..
Geralt: Let's just go our separate ways, and if we both survive, we'll meet again, with no more cards, and no more games.
Jaina: I do not know about you, but I shall not back down from a fight.
Geralt closed his eyes.
Geralt: It seems we won't meet again, after all.
Jaina: What are you? Wait.. what's that?
The footsteps that were heard turned louder and louder. Jaina looked over her shoulder to see a blur in jeans and a dirty white shirt, and, its fist, respectively.
Trevor punched Jaina, knocking her out cold.
Water Elemental: NO! MISTRESS! WHAT DID YOU DO?!
Trevor looked the Water Elemental up and down: What the FUCK are you?
Water Elemental: My name is Water Elemental the Fifth, and you, sir, punched my conjurer!
Trevor: OHHH, you mean she's the one who summoned you?
Water Elemental: Yes!
Trevor kicked Jaina, and the Water Elemental got smaller.
Water Elemental: Stop that!
Water Elemental shot a current at Trevor, who ducked, then kicked Jaina again, making the Water Elemental smaller yet.
Trevor: YOU SHOULD THANK ME, MISTER ELEMENTAL, I'M SAVING YOU FROM YOUR CHAINS!
Water Elemental: But.. I LIKE MY CHAINS!
Trevor kicked Jaina again, who squirmed and coughed up blood. The Water Elemental was the size of a bigger dog by now.
Geralt stepped in: Stop it. Now. No need to make him suffer.
Trevor: Well whoop-dee-fucking-doo, the knight in shining armour. FINE BY ME, HOMBRE!
Trevor whipped out a pistol and shot Jaina in the head, as the Water Elemental poofed away.
Fifth death: Jaina Proudmore
Trevor leaned in to Geralt and whispered: C'mon big man, you want to tango? Cause I got the FUCKING MOVES!
Geralt backed off: This isn't my business.
Geralt sheathed his sword, and walked off. He turned his head towards Trevor, who was surprised he was being denied a fight, and said: Besides, you seem to be busy with someone else.
Trevor: The fuck?
He turned around to see SCP 106 staring him down.
Trevor laughed: Back for more, you EXPERIMENTAL GOVERNMENT PIECE OF SHIT?
To be continued...
Even though this SEEMS dead, it actually is
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