Nintendo Battle Royale!

[Lohuydahutt]

[COFFEE NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO O

meh, at least I got to pick 3]

[sane]

The hardest one for me to write is the Ultraman, Marx, Nightmare, and Plasm Wraith scenes. I know the least about all of these characters.

The Smash Bros scene has the most characters btw. 9 in all.

[BrineBlade]

is it alright if Goomboss is changed out for Jibanyan (from Yo-Kai Watch)?

[sane]

is it alright if Goomboss is changed out for Jibanyan (from Yo-Kai Watch)?

who the fuck is t-

I already wrote that scene with intentions of Goomboss appearing :3

[Turtlesauce]

Alright, I like how this is setting up a lot of stuff.

Looking forward for more :3

[Faker]

I couldn't tell, did any of my characters make an appearance yet?

Also good episode! Layton's writing is already on point.

[sane]

Every character appears except for Nightmare and Plasm Wraith

[sane]

Can someone do an analysis

[BrineBlade]

I'll do one in a bit.

[Lohuydahutt]

I know Brine said he’d do it but I was half way done when you posted that xP
Nintendo Battle Royale Analysis

Marx

Well, he’s a final boss worthy of being Kirby’s adversary, so you just KNOW he’s OP canonically xP I’ve never personally fought this guy but watching a Let’s Play fight and reading the wiki… Well, he’s canonically quite powerful obviously, and he has a good enough movepool to compliment it. Marx does a lot of weird shit really. I mean, there’s regular stuff like teleporting and lasers, but then there’s also shit like dropping seeds to grow fucking thorn vines out of the ground immediately, split himself in half and be just fine, and also LOOK AT THAT FUCKING FACE. I doubt he’ll win, but I think he has a good chance of doing some damage before he goes out.

Phosphora

Oh hey that lightning assist trophy chick. And yeah, she does electric stuff, shocking I know *shot* but yeah, of all the possible lightning users in nintendo, she definitely seems like one of the better ones. She doesn’t just shoot electricity, she can teleport, turn herself into a fucking lightning bolt, hell, she can even summon fucking storms. Yeah I don’t think anybody should fuck with this chick.

Mr. Gayman Watch

Unlike the two above, Mr. Game and Watch is canonically weak as fuck. But with the composited smash version, he has the potential to do well especially since nerfing shall be applied. I mean, if you really want to be liberal with your interpretation of his bucket, he could even absorb shit like Marx’s laser and other powerful shit like that. I would NOT want to be on the receiving end of his bucket if he were to absorb something like that. What gives him a decent chance is his versatility. He has so much random stuff that PROBABLY wouldn’t be an effective weapon in a realistic scenario. I mean, his giant ass hammer(s) could be useful in a real life scenario, so that’s something I guess. Go get ‘em Gayman :D

Scalding Cup of Coffee

Scalding Cup of Coffee was actually nerfed, and Sane admitted to it. Let me repeat that so everybody reading this knows, Scalding Cup of Coffee was nerfed and Sane admitted to it. You see, secretly Scalding Cup of Coffee is actually the most OP character in the game, but Sane, being the sneaky fucker that he was, wanted to get him out early since he was so OP. Knowing that everybody else would just ASSUME that Scalding Cup of Coffee was a weakling, he let him die like that. But mark my words, YOU CAN’T SHOOT ME DOWN WITH YOUR ARROW OF LIES!

OK yes Coffee was a complete one trick pony but scalding coffee actually IS more powerful than just a hot cup of coffee. It would NOT have died from such a short drop and it would easily have done more damage to Layton. I rest my case =P

Ganondorf

The king of evil himself, unlike Mr. Game and Watch he’s actually way more powerful outside of Smash. In smash he’s a slow hard hitter with a bit of dark magic and… canonically, well, that’s pretty much still what he does but you know, it’s expanded upon. He also has a sword (or dual katanas in Wind Waker) so that’s a thing. Ganondorf may kind of suck in Smash (I still love playing as him tho) but if we take what he’s ACTUALLY like in LOZ, he does NOT fuck around.

Meta Knight

Canonically speaking, this guy is OP. Smash Bros Brawl wise, this guy is OP. Smash Bros 4? Not as much :3 There’s not much to say about this guy, he’s ridiculously fast (QUITE possibly faster than light canonically, Sakurai confirmed that he can swing his sword at LEAST at the speed of sound), and he can do quite a few cool tricks with his sword like the mach tornado and such. Also he’s a bad ass, also he can fly, also he can teleport. He’s probably getting nerfed though, so we’ll see.

Mike Tyson

He’s Mike fucking Tyson at his prime, what more do you need to know? He can punch hard and fast, is ridiculously hard to beat in the Punch Out games and… that’s pretty much it.

Polar Mii

Miis have been in a lot of different games, and their skillset would entirely depend on which games Sane considers. If he just treats it like a Mii Fighter, then well, then it depends on what Mii Fighter he presents him as. Honestly there are quite a few options here so it’s hard to analyze until I know what angle Sane goes for.

The Moon

Well, it’s the fucking Moon. If it crashes into the earth it has the potential to kill a shit load of characters.

Ultraman

Well, he’s not really a nintendo character, nor a video game character originally, but whatever. He’s 40 fucking meters tall so that’s already something to consider. Other than how fucking huge he is, he’s basically a standard melee fighter, except he has some weird giant laser thing called a specium ray. That’s about it from what I’ve found.

Vincenzo

Well, he’s good at sports sort of, so I guess he could bludgeon people to death with a baseball bat…? yeah, probably.

Wii Sports Resort Jet Ski Announcer

Wait… does Jet Ski even HAVE an announcer?

Bill Board

Bill Board is literally just a talking sign. I mean, he could be interesting depending on how far you take the “give advice to other players” angle, but otherwise, it’s a sign. Scalding Cup of Coffee would DEFINITELY kick his ass.

Zora

Oh hey those fish man things from Zelda alrightttttt. Well, they swim really well, so that’s something. Also I guess they’re apparently capable of shooting balls of energy… Yeah that’s about all I can say about them tbh.

Mr. Resetti

He really hates it when you reset. So like, don’t do that. Also I guess he’s good at digging, maybe that pickaxe could be a useful weapon…

Kellam

If there’s one thing that gives him a distinct advantage over other characters, it’s the fact that almost nobody ever acknowledges that he exists. Beyond that, he has armor, he has a lance, he has a javelin, and depending on how you upgrade him he can have much more than that. In fights he’s the type of guy to tank a shit load of hits and then just deal ‘em right back. But yeah, Sane, I will be disappoint if you don’t take advantage of how forgettable he is in this royale. It’s honestly his best combat advantage here xP

King Dedede

Considering how he trades blow with Kirby, he’s kind of OP canonically. Even with nerfs he’s no slouch. He can throw gordos, has that fucking hammer, can fly (actually pretty fast when he wants to), is pretty strong, can like, eat people then spit them out I guess… Just look at his moveset in smash really. Certainly a contender.

Walrein

Oh hey, my evolution. Going off of base stats, Walrein has relatively low speed, somewhat average attack, special attack, defense, and sp. defense, and above average HP. This means that Walrein’s basically a tank fighter, meant to tank hits and then strike back. Basing his moveset off his level up movepool, he can summon a small blizzard, sheer cold is OP, can make it hail for a short period of time, can fully recover his health by sleeping, can troll guys with encore, has swag, can boost his own defense, and more. While he’s probs not winning this, he’s no slouch.

Plasm Wraith

This guy could either be a bit weak or pretty fucking powerful depending on whether or not this guy gets sized up proportionally. Considering how small well, Pikmin are. He’s some weird golden blob of something, and can absorb stuff smaller than it with ease and can generally choose to kill them once inside if it pleases. Can create illusions, but they’d likely all be illusions of stuff smaller than him so that’s probably not too helpful. Can make his arms turn into fucking needles and hit stuff rapidly which is FUCKING ANNOYING AHHHHH but yeah. Can regenerate with ease if individual pieces of protoplasm are not completely destroyed. But if individual parts ARE destroyed then the dude starts shrinking even more. Has limited elemental power, being able to spit out cubes that spawn as a FUCKING BUBBLE (not that effective in this context) FUCKING FIRE (more useful) an ELECTRIC BARRIER (useful) and a GLASS CUBE (not particularly useful in this context unless he gets sized up). So yeah, he’s probably more powerful in Pikmin’s context than this actual BR but he’s going to be really formidable if he gets sized up proportionally, but key word there: if.

Simon Belmont

He can whip, but he can’t nae nae. I’m not sure how effective shit like the cross would be against regular fighters, but even if it was he doesn’t have all that much going for him past his good arsenal.

X

MERGA MANNNNNNNNNN, well, I don’t know the full extent of X’s powers. I know he’s more powerful than the Classic version, and also he can upgrade himself and whatever. Also he can WALL JUMP :OOOOOOOOOO and DASH :OOOOOOOOOOOOOOO and also from what I gather, he has a nice varied arsenal like Classic does. So basically, Merga Man Classic on steroids, definitely a contender.

Pit

Well, I haven’t played Uprising, I’m sure Sane could pull quite a few extra cool weapons out of him from there. But yeah, he’s a pretty strong fighter regardless. He can fly (sort of) he has a bow that he can like, shoot people with. He can like, go HYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYA and IT’S FUCKING ANNOYING AHHHH *cracks screen*

Waluigi

Is the best. I will hear no words to the contrary. I mean, he doesn’t do much but play Tennis and ride go karts and throw bob-ombs but still.

Wolf O’Donnel

To my understanding, the only time Wolf really fights outside of his arwing or whatever it’s called is in smash, but you know, compared to Fox he’s a slower but more powerful hitter, using his claws and all of that shit. Also the fact that his recovery fucking sucks won’t be as much of a hindrance now =D probably not winning but still a decent fighter. Should totally have been in Smash 4 btw, he’s >>>>>>>>> Falco

Nightmare

Oh hey, another Kirby final boss. You just KNOW he’s OP canonically. He’s a magic motherfucker, capable of teleporting, shooting star projectiles, doing some weird tornado thing, and all of that shit. Doesn’t seem to have as much moveset diversity as Marx, but still powerful nonetheless.

Goomboss

He’s like a goomba, except like, really big. Goomboss OP pls nerf

Mr. L

Has the distinct advantage of Sane’s bias to pull him through

Professor Layton

Not much to him, he’s good with puzzles and a sword. Not much else really. He did kill the most OP character in the game tho. So I have to give him some credit.

Yoshi

It’s motherfucking Yoshi! Outside of Brawl, I’m pretty sure nothing he turns into an egg comes back to life, so that could potentially be very deadly. Also has da power to turn a character’s projectiles against them with ease. Is also so adorable it’s scary.

Skull Kid

With Majora’s Mask, he can crash the moon into the earth and kill everyone =D Skull Kid himself isn’t that much of a threat, but the mask is. It has all sorts of weird reality bending shit (not Bill Chiper level or anything but still) and is also quite possibly one of the creepiest Nintendo bosses ever.