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Thread: My Older Brother's Problem

  1. #1
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
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    My Older Brother's Problem

    My older brother is pretty anti-transgender. I don't really get it. He's very, very liberal on most issues, he voted for Bernie Sanders, but he gets very angry whenever someone suggests that transgender people should be treated the way they want to be treated. He calls them by their birth names, he says that he'd never under any circumstances let a child of his born male wear female clothing to school, he says that they're "fucked up in the head", a lot of stuff like that. He says that "children's mental problems should be addressed at a young age so that they don't become transgender", and then when I ask "what if they're a teenager and they say that they want to change genders", and he says "well at that point it's too late".

    We both seem to feel very passionately about this issue and we argue about it intensely at least once every few weeks. The rest of my family is getting annoyed by our heated discussions (they mostly agree with me but they don't feel nearly as strongly about it as I do). Does anyone know of any way I can convince him to change his views?

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    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
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  2. #2
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    I think the best way to handle this is to not talk about it. He's free to believe what he wants to believe. How do conversations about it start anyway?

  3. #3
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
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    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore** View Post
    I think the best way to handle this is to not talk about it. He's free to believe what he wants to believe. How do conversations about it start anyway?
    He's always the first one to start the discussion. Whenever anything regarding the subject comes up at all in any way, TV, internet, regular family discussion, etc., he always starts ranting about transgender people.

    I want to just keep quiet, but I just think about how so many people I know and care about would be really hurt by what he's saying. I think the fact that views like his are so common is a big problem in this country (and the world), and I feel obligated to do SOMETHING about it when it's happening in my own house. But I'm starting to think there's nothing I can do.

    If you want me to review something of yours, click me.
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    We're all humans, we all make mistakes, but try to always keep the site rules in mind..

    Things on here I found funny:
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambama
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    wumbo write anotherfanfic now
    have nice peter come in
    "it's nice peter bitches"
    ""and i'm going to give you all my NICE PETER"
    and then peter visits the forum
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by zyroda View Post
    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
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    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
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    SENT
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    Honest Wumbabe
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperRapz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocket
    Gogos are not 4 year old toys, they're a choking hazard.
    You Know What Else Is A Choking Hazard? My Penis. So you Better Stop Sucking On it So hard, Four Year Old. Make A New Thread For your Spam, You Stupid Bitch. We Try To have Fun Here. And Don't Jump On me About MLP, You Stupid little Fuck. Like YN Said, Go Get Tested Or Some Shit. I'm Tired Of Putting Up With You. Pie Licking Bitch, Go Shove A Pickle up Your Ass. Better Yet, A Banana.
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambaba
    http://aattp.org/conservative-christian-rewrote-harry-potter-so-her-kids-wont-turn-into-witches/
    I'm not reading past the title

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Luther King, Jr.
    Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.

  4. #4
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Samilton View Post
    He's always the first one to start the discussion. Whenever anything regarding the subject comes up at all in any way, TV, internet, regular family discussion, etc., he always starts ranting about transgender people.

    I want to just keep quiet, but I just think about how so many people I know and care about would be really hurt by what he's saying. I think the fact that views like his are so common is a big problem in this country (and the world), and I feel obligated to do SOMETHING about it when it's happening in my own house. But I'm starting to think there's nothing I can do.
    Maybe put your focus on trying to get him to stop talking about it and not on changing his views? Maybe tell him that when he says things about it it only starts unnecessary debates.

  5. #5
    I'm going be real for a second..

    Tell him to quit talking to you about it and start talking to somebody who actually cares about what he has to say. If you can just ignore the moments he tries to spark an argument and then tell him that he should tell someone who actually cares about it the same way he does (maybe think of a more nicer, but still stern, way of phrasing it). Let him know that you just don't agree with him, and nothing he says will change your mind and that's that. Then stick to your guns and just do your darnedest to ignore it should he bring it up again. After this, a few times of the cold shoulder in these situations plus those words should begin to sink in.

    But that's just how I would handle it given what I know about him. Obviously everyone has a different personality type, so what works for some may not work for others. This is just my own personal advice.
    Watch Magical Girl Raising Project. Just do it.

  6. #6
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
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    I guess I could try being less direct in my responses to him and kind of have an "I can't take you seriously anymore" attitude whenever he tries to start something.

    He LOVES to argue. He's gotten into a lot of internet flame wars over the years. So maybe if I try to deny him the pleasure of arguing then that'll help.

    If you want me to review something of yours, click me.
    Spoiler: 


    We're all humans, we all make mistakes, but try to always keep the site rules in mind..

    Things on here I found funny:
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambama
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    wumbo write anotherfanfic now
    have nice peter come in
    "it's nice peter bitches"
    ""and i'm going to give you all my NICE PETER"
    and then peter visits the forum
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by zyroda View Post
    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
    Quote Originally Posted by TDFE Confessional
    Quote Originally Posted by GonadtheNomad
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    SENT
    lies
    i never lie
    Honest Wumbabe
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperRapz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocket
    Gogos are not 4 year old toys, they're a choking hazard.
    You Know What Else Is A Choking Hazard? My Penis. So you Better Stop Sucking On it So hard, Four Year Old. Make A New Thread For your Spam, You Stupid Bitch. We Try To have Fun Here. And Don't Jump On me About MLP, You Stupid little Fuck. Like YN Said, Go Get Tested Or Some Shit. I'm Tired Of Putting Up With You. Pie Licking Bitch, Go Shove A Pickle up Your Ass. Better Yet, A Banana.
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambaba
    http://aattp.org/conservative-christian-rewrote-harry-potter-so-her-kids-wont-turn-into-witches/
    I'm not reading past the title

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Luther King, Jr.
    Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by Samilton View Post
    I guess I could try being less direct in my responses to him and kind of have an "I can't take you seriously anymore" attitude whenever he tries to start something.

    He LOVES to argue. He's gotten into a lot of internet flame wars over the years. So maybe if I try to deny him the pleasure of arguing then that'll help.
    Exactly. Can't hurt to try!
    Watch Magical Girl Raising Project. Just do it.

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