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Thread: The BR of Stuff Juiz Likes 2: Electric Boogaloo

  1. #21
    YellowNerd's Avatar More Blonde in your Movie
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    I love it, I like how you Bold the characters, makes reading a lot easier!

  2. #22
    Lohuydahutt's Avatar Senior Member
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    Here's to the late and great breakfast spaghetti. You were a real one.

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    My life story:
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    I am PolarBore's official Assistant Mangager (again)

  3. #23
    Kubby's Avatar Lifetime of Green
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    Forced Analysis Pounding

    C9 Sneaky:
    Spoiler: 
    A professional gamer, and a known cosplayer. If you want to make the guy overpowered, no prob. Make cosplay equal perfect disguise, throw in a sprinkle of I Know Mortal Kombat trope, even if I don't how LoL knowledge applies to a fight to the death, and make him the equivalent of what he plays - an AD carry - and have him become more powerful as the BR goes on. If you don't want that... Well, he's still an average human (admittedly with above average reflexes) with no real combat experience.


    Lisa from Blackpink:
    Spoiler: 
    She's a singer, a part of this K-Pop girl group Blackpink. If you want to make her overpowered, keep in mind that bard is a well estabilished class in most fantasy settings and the power of music carries over to more modern settings. For examples of that, see the Rockerboy class in Cyberpunk 2020. She could really be a viable comb- Oh wait, she's dead. I guess reality had to ensue for someone. Nevermind, carry on.


    Mordekaiser:
    Spoiler: 
    Hmmm. Nice. Nice. Mordekaiser. A LoL champion, a brutal warlord, a necromancer. Very much a melee character. Can smash shit into pieces, channel damage he deals into his own force shield thing, can pull his opponents closer in, and he's got his own pocket dimension, and the damage he deals scales with the opponent's health. That, I deem powerful as fuck. Of course, he has weaknesses. While he does have some ranged abilities, they are rather slow. This could be exploited, I guess. A very good candidate.


    Shang Tsung:
    Spoiler: 
    Mortal Kombat's resident soul stealer sorcerer. So, yeah, he mastered the soul magic, and can take others souls for himself. He needs that as well, since he's cursed to age rapidly and wither and die, and souls can make him younger. He's also a fire sorcerer, and apparently his fireballs can wreck a helicopter? Of course, his most trademark ability is that he can morph into others and copy their powers and memories


    The physical embodiment of making fun of Gunnut:
    Spoiler: 
    OK, this figure... "I use the term "figure" very loosely, as it was a creepy, blob of Juiz, Adonis, Jenny, Sparts, Dion, Log, and a bunch of other forumers". Eugh. Shang Tsung? Can you put this thing out of its misery and kill it with fire? Thanks. Well, if you want to make this one overpowered, it's more than one person. It's several people merged together. So that means it's gonna be as strong as several people together... right? On the other hand, it's fucking disgusting, and only has a chance because I've also made fun of Gunnut.


    Thanos:
    Spoiler: 
    Ok, Thanos is too powerful for his own good. He survived a black hole. He bitchslaps the incredible Hulk. Dodges laser guns. Of course he's gonna get nerfed in a BR. That's the way it is with characters that are way too powerful. And, let me tell you, Thanos is very good at getting nerfed.


    Ashe:
    Spoiler: 
    Ashe, the LoL's Frost Archer lady. From what I've read, she's that annoying type of character that won't kill you, but instead will completely and utterly stop you from killing her. I mean, he's got this ice bow, right? And even her basic shot is gonna ice up the target, slow-em down. And she can spam those arrows. She also has this hawk spirit for recon. She also has this attack, where she fires this giant bolt of ice, and stuns the enemy, and fucks them up with magic.

    And there's more to her than her attack power. She's a leader of this Avasoran tribe thing, a warmother, see. Now, she's not comfortable with being a leader, but she is a somewhat competent one. That could help with striking alliances. And the fact is that intelligence translates to creativity. There's many things she can do, which bodes well for her survival compared to simpler damage dealers. I did look up some Mordekaiser v Ashe stats though, and the former seems to have an advantage.


    Ninja Brian:
    Spoiler: 
    Ninja Brian. Plays a mean keyboard, and likes killing people. That means he's perfectly suited for a battle royale. Especially that first part. Joking aside, he's actually a strong combatant. He has a wide assortment of ninja tools - a katana, smoke pellets, some poisoned blowdarts. He can blow up a house with nothing but his mental powers. He can shoot eye lasers, which once blew up the Sun. Yeah, no, he's getting nerfed. Moreover, his silence and his tendency to kill means he's unlikely to get into alliances and can thus get into an unfavourable matchup.


    Joseph Joestar:
    Spoiler: 
    OK, let me tell you. This character overwhelms me. I did not do these in order, and Joestar is the last one I'm writing up.

    "Your next line is..'Well, Juiz told me he's not gonna have his stand for this BR.'"

    Well, Juiz told me he's not gonna have his stand for this BR. Eugh. That's weird. But, this demonstrates one of Joestar's abilities. He's a Sherlock Holmes, but in a buff badass anime man body. He's very good at dealing with people who outmatch him by applying trickery and deception in an ample dose. Expect this guy to predict what his opponents are gonna do and use it to his advantage. And it's not like he needs to resort to that all the time. He's tough enough to get slammed into a metal wall, dent it, and then walk it off. He can shatter stones with nothing but a chop. He can breathe in a special way that makes him capable of karate chopping swords and winning, evaporating some dude's arm (fyi, this "some dude" could eat a stick of dynamite, let it explode in his stomach and shrug it off) and also makes his hair deflect bullets. Wut. I'm out. From my perspective, it's analysis over. Thank you.


    Caillou:
    Spoiler: 
    Chances don't look goot for Caillou. He's a whiny-ass 4-year-old. Sometimes called "The Prince of Imagination", which let's be honest, would be badass as fuck if it did not describe Caillou. He does not have abilities to survive a BR, does not have personality to have plot armor, and the very first chapter has him fighting against a fierce opponent: cancer.

    Let me just say something. This is The BR of Stuff Juiz Likes. Caillou classifies as "Stuff Juiz Likes". Oof. In fact, you can say the same about cancer being in here, but, let's be honest here. Caillou's worse.


    James Willems:
    Spoiler: 
    Ok, that seems like a strong contestant, right? An entertainer, very likely to get along with everyone, to forge allianced, and when it comes to combat, his high-school wrestling experience can only help, see? There's just one problem. Lately, his entertainment was a bit... soul-less. Get it? Cause he got his soul absorbed by Shang Tsung?


    Cancer:
    Spoiler: 
    "Cancer is a group of diseases involving abnormal cell growth with the potential to invade or spread to other parts of the body." - Wikipedia, 2019.

    Cancer is one mean son of a bitch, the 3rd most common cause of death. It just has one little weakness. It's not an infectious disease. Unless you transplant a cancer-ridden organ into your body I guess. Once it kills someone, it's gonna be defeated. Unless Juiz decides to resurrect a character killed by cancer as a Tumor-Man or something.


    Dion:
    Spoiler: 
    Let me tell you. Dion is in his element right now. Assuming he remembers that one time he was Meta Dion, he remembers how he once teamed up with Professor Layton and broke a Battle Royale (#TeamFriendship forever). And he's in an alliance right now! Will he break another BR with his Canadian politeness? Then again, he was a fukin' douche last time Juiz had him in a BR (In fact, he started the whole thing), so his characterization here remains a mystery. If you want to invoke national stereotypes, remember - hockey translates well to combat. He's also an admin of some obscure site. It might give him a banhammer or something.


    Andrade:
    Spoiler: 
    Let's see... who is this... Ah, a WWE wrestler. I'm gonna assume that the guy that is in the BR is Andrade the character and not Manuel Alfonso Andrade Oropeza the real person. That's relevant, because well, while in real life all the wrestlers are simply showmen, though admittedly very athletic ones, their kayfabe personas are these badass juggernauts doing superhuman shit. There's a reason WWE is sometimes called "redneck anime". Nevertheless, I'm concerned for him. He naturally has no ranged options for wreaking havok, the language barrier can make it difficult to forge friendships with others, and it seems like his current match statistics are rather sucky (8 wins in 54 matches. Ow.)

    Look at this shit though. Or that double somersault thing. Fucking hell. I'm not really into WWE, but I'm still impressed.


    ImmortalHD:
    Spoiler: 
    From a quick read up... He's a youtuber. From Russia. A memelord with a weak meme game. He does seem sorta jacked, but there isn't much to go off. He does not stand a real chance in this battle, unless you get him a good gun and say his FPS experience translates to real life combat. However, if that "Immortal" bit in his name is more than just a name, things might get way more interesting, wouldn't you say.


    Yellownerd:
    Spoiler: 
    Now, I've no idea where on sliding scale of realism vs forum feats this is, but in his forum death battle with Ranger, it was shown he can break dicks, in all meanings, meaning he's a good matchup against males, against unpleasant people and against people named Richard. If you want to invoke the "Asians are good at martial arts" stereotype, know that Eskrima (also Kali or Arnis), the national martial art of Philippines, emphasizes weapon-based fighting, and that includes improvised weaponry. If you want to invoke the "Asians are good at maths" stereotype, don't. YN is not good at maths.


    Juiz' IRL friend Dylan:
    Spoiler: 
    OK, so Juiz' IRL friend Dylan is this small (157 cm) dude, but jacked as hell. This pint size ball of pain. Both a hard hitter and hard to hit. Plus, he's a weeb. Meaning, he presumably knows many of the combatants and knows how to deal with them. The power of prep should not be underestimated. There are some problems though. Juiz has him listed as "dumb bitch idiot face" in contacts, which may indicate a general lack of intelligence. However, it might just be Juiz ribbing on his friend. Only Juiz knows. Also, being a weeb, he might be weak to influence from certain entities.


    A maid catgirl:
    Spoiler: 
    Speaking of entities your average weeb would be weak to, this is a maid catgirl, nyaah :3. Depending on how competent she is at her job, she might very well make a perfect assassin. After all, if she never reveals herself to be a combatant, nothing stops her from serving others some poisoned food. Nothing stops her from setting up a trap while cleaning their room. Most importantly, there's a huge overlap between skills required to be an effective maid/housekeeper and skills required to get rid of the evidence.


    Minecraft Steve:
    Spoiler: 
    The master of environment manipulation, Steve shows up already wielding his trademark diamond pickaxe. I think Juiz already demonstrated that he can bust through most materials. Or course, his building potential can't be underestimated either. BAM! instant cover. BAM! there's a portal to this hell-like world. BAM! there's a fukin' redstone computer. He has some ranged options, such as magic damage dealing potions (or nerfing potions), bows and crossbows. He has explosive options (see TNT). He can buff himself with beneficial potions. If you want to take game mechanics into account, his ability to carry 2304 gold blocks means he's got lifting capacity of about 44.4 thousands of tons That's about 100 Boeings 747.

    Steve can do a shitload of stuff, which adds to his ability not to run his course. Unfortunately, he does not have that much of a personality, and he's a tad of a glass cannon, with his durability being less than stellar.


    Juiz:
    Spoiler: 
    OK. Last time Juiz was in his own BR, he was a bona-fide reality bender, capable of shaping how the BR turns out with his laptop, but not particularly strong otherwise. Reality bending is one of the OPiest abilities ever, so it's good it's attached to one of the wimpier combatants here. Now, Juiz can win this, however he should beware of two things. One, his reality bendery is not instant. The fact that he has to type what happens for it to happen means he can very easily be outspeeded. Second thing - if you've attended the Dr Clef's seminar, "Reality Benders and You: How to Survive When Existence Doesn't," you know there is one way to defeat a reality bender - kill them before they know you're here. Or destroy their laptop, I guess. And there are characters that can sneak up on Juiz very easily.

    There's also the fact that Juiz probably is not full enough of himself to make himself the winner.


    Frank Reynolds:
    Spoiler: 
    Remember, guys, it's always sunny in BR-delphia. Frank, he's not physically imposing. He's not a strong combatant. His strength lies in cunning. A great schemer, capable of pulling off multiple get-rich-quick schemes, and being a successful businessman. Now, let me tell you about another great schemer in this tournament: Shang Tsung. And, you see, Shang Tsung has magic powers, is skilled in kombat, and isn't 4'10'' (that's less than 150 cm.) Yeah, I'm gonna say that Frank stands about as much chance at winning this as Ranger at getting a girl.


    Chrom:
    Spoiler: 
    He's got a falchion (an exalted one, to be more specific). He's got cunning. And he plays a critical role in FE Awakening, being one of the protagonists of the game. A great leader, a great swordsman, with some self-healing capabilities and an unbreakable sword. His signature move is Aether, which not only makes 2 (two!) slashes at enemies, it heals Chrom and ignores the target's durability. He should however watch out for mages, since, as is usual for non-magic units in FE, his defence against magic is rather weak.

    I should probably add that he's voiced by Matt Mercer. That's always a plus.


    Megumin:
    Spoiler: 
    Stuff blowing up is always fun. Especially when it comes from a little girl dressing up as a witch. And boy, can she make stuff blow up. Like, one time, she made this city-sized explosion. That seems OP, and it kinda is, but stuff blowing up is always cool. Of course, she can also survive getting blown up as well. And she is a decent strategist too. Don't worry though. She has weaknesses as well. She's got poor endurance, and more powerful attacks will most definitely exhaust her to the point she cannot move a muscle. Her self-control is lacking and she's also not exactly subtle, especially with her vow to make an explosion at least once a day.


    Kenji Setou:
    Spoiler: 
    Ok, when I first saw the name, I've expected this badass sentai hero dude. What I've learned is that he's... not that at all. Realistically speaking, he stands little to no chance. Not only has he got the physique of an average high-schooler, he's also legally blind (which does not help his combat potential) and his suspiciousness/paranoia means that his alliance making potential is also compromised. But, hey, if there are any roofs nearby... Well, let's say accidents happen.


    Wumbo:
    Spoiler: 
    Wumbo is one forumer I don't know much about. Juiz, you're probably more up-to-date with forumer feats than I am. What's that? He's a "shrek boi fascist mod meme lord guy"? I see. I can work with that. Being a mod, he's hopefully got some leadership quantities and hopefully enough perception to have a battle royale under control (if he's got the forum under control, then it extend over to other avenues, right?). I suppose he can get somewhat far if he uses his skills to pressure someone into cooperating, but he's no winner material. Sorry.


    Breakfast Spaghetti:
    Spoiler: 
    So, last time spaghetti was in a Juiz' BR, Juiz ended it by having himself eat it. Surely that won't happen ag- Oh. Well, what can I say. Spaghetti is a food. Food is meant to be eaten, that's its purpose. Who knows, it might turn out that Breakfast Spaghetti is the only combatant of this DR that has fulfilled its purpose. I think we can all agree that Breakfast Spaghetti is the true winner of this bout.


    Peach Vodka:
    Spoiler: 
    Well, okay, scratch what I've said previously. It's a bottle of vodka. It's in a Russian's hand. It's a very unfavourable match-up for the bottle of vodka. Then again, it's a peach vodka. It's not pure. Who knows, ImmortalHD might be an elitist when it comes to his vodka. Unfortunately, most bottles of vodka are not big enough for alcohol in it to cause lethal alcohol poisoning in an adult. So, unless it falls into hands of Caillou, I just don't see it killing anybody. Sorry.

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