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Thread: EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY - VLADIMIR PUTIN VS RASPUTIN

  1. #1
    Moonjik's Avatar Fine Red Wine
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    EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY - VLADIMIR PUTIN VS RASPUTIN

    [youtube:104ff5df]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQkYXpPWKMc[/youtube:104ff5df]

    EPIC RAP BATTLES OF RUSSIAN 'PUTINS' FROM TWO PERIODS OF RUSSIAN HISTORY!


    REPRESENTING THE RUSSIAN EMPIRE UNDER THE TSAR, IT'S GRIGORI RASPUTIN

    Rasputin:
    Yes, it is I, the famed Russian mystic, Grigori Raspu-

    VS


    AND REPRESENTING THE MODERN RUSSIAN FEDERATION, IT'S VLADIMIR PUTIN

    Putin:
    Let's do this!

    BEGIN!


    Rasputin:
    [spoiler:104ff5df]You think you're manlier than me? Please, you don't even have a beard!
    I see into your future, and damn, is that shit clear,
    You froze our economy so bad you can't even get a shirt!
    You mess with the mad monk and you're gonna get hurt!
    You struggle with Georgia and Chechnya? Seriously...
    You can't even control the broadcasting power of the KGB!
    You know how hard it was to fucking kill me?
    Let's just say I can survive the rhymes of this fairy,[/spoiler:104ff5df]


    Putin:
    [spoiler:104ff5df]Who are you calling a fairy? Vlad is a playa,
    I liked you better in that movie, Anastasia,
    I ripped through the North Caucus as if it were a condom!
    You hard to kill, true, but you died of hypothermia!
    I instill fear into America and all the nations of Western Europe,
    You're a crazy old preacher who'll get hit with more bullets!
    You ride on my Federal Subjects? Please, I'll send you to Hell,
    When I look at you, I can see why the Romanovs fell,[/spoiler:104ff5df]


    Rasputin:
    [spoiler:104ff5df]RAAR! I'd heal my wounds if you'd actually caused some!
    I actually look like a rocker, you're a balding piece of scum!
    I'm elevated to cult status, you got the name of an impaler,
    I destroyed the last man that fucked with me, ask Guseva![/spoiler:104ff5df]


    Putin:
    [spoiler:104ff5df]I AM BUFF! Your whole assassination was a bluff!
    You ran from gunfire before you were bludgeoned enough!
    Just hearing me make a speech, puts hairs on your chest!
    And I could drown more vodka, no contest,[/spoiler:104ff5df]


    Rasputin:
    [spoiler:104ff5df]Bitch, now you've gone a step to far, get on your knees,
    I'm Ra-Ra-Rasputin, Russia's greatest love machine![/spoiler:104ff5df]


    Putin:
    [spoiler:104ff5df]You were a puppet of the tsar! I lead the Federation,
    You're so pathetic you didn't even DIE when you were meant to, forget the poison![/spoiler:104ff5df]


    Rasputin:
    [spoiler:104ff5df]Bitch, you even heard Chesseruct?[/spoiler:104ff5df]


    Putin:
    [spoiler:104ff5df]All I know is that it made your dick erect,[/spoiler:104ff5df]


    Stalin:
    [spoiler:104ff5df]GRRRRR! You think you can take me? IT'S COMMUNISM FUCKERS!
    Straight from the Revolution, your rhymes are a Chernobyl disaster!
    Putin! Quit your hooting, I represent the Soviet Union!
    I'm gonna block you off like the wall in Berlin!
    And you, Rasputin, your government fell apart,
    Like Lenin, rage Bolshevik and stab you in your black heart!
    I'll bring the pain like in Ukraine, slap you harder than the Baltics,
    Just fly by Nazi Germany and get my "grad" up your uterus!
    You gotta love me and all my 11 Timezones, I'm the man,
    I'm gonna skewer your ass just like Afghanistan!
    When a mad little mystic and dumb jock step up to the mic,
    Bring my Winter War of cum and cover everything in sight!
    NIGHT![/spoiler:104ff5df]

    WHO WON? WHO'S NEX-WAIT, ARE THOSE TANKS? SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIITEPICRAPBATTLESOFHISTORY!
    But,░in░truth,░I░have░wept░too░much!░Dawns░are░hea rtbreaking.
    Ξvery░moon░is░atrocious░and░every░sun░bitter. (ュ だ  どいロリラ威萎虞う ャイ意営縁ぇヵ)

    Quote Originally Posted by Juiz
    moon you're hurting me in ways you'll never even know. lets do that suicide, buddy.

  2. #2
    Spars's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
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    Re: EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY - VLADIMIR PUTIN VS RASPUTIN

    Rasputin won.


    Spoiler: 






    Thanks peeps <3333

  3. #3
    Moonjik's Avatar Fine Red Wine
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    Re: EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY - VLADIMIR PUTIN VS RASPUTIN

    Thanks for the comment.
    But,░in░truth,░I░have░wept░too░much!░Dawns░are░hea rtbreaking.
    Ξvery░moon░is░atrocious░and░every░sun░bitter. (ュ だ  どいロリラ威萎虞う ャイ意営縁ぇヵ)

    Quote Originally Posted by Juiz
    moon you're hurting me in ways you'll never even know. lets do that suicide, buddy.

  4. #4
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    Re: EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY - VLADIMIR PUTIN VS RASPUTIN

    Rasputin won
    [spoiler:1uz90yfi]NOW SING IT IN THAT SEXY CREEPY VOICE OF YOURS[/spoiler:1uz90yfi]

  5. #5
    Moonjik's Avatar Fine Red Wine
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    Re: EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY - VLADIMIR PUTIN VS RASPUTIN

    Quote Originally Posted by Fact_Inspector
    Rasputin won
    [spoiler:1jh71rlx]NOW SING IT IN THAT SEXY CREEPY VOICE OF YOURS[/spoiler:1jh71rlx]
    I would but my Russian accent isn't all that good.
    But,░in░truth,░I░have░wept░too░much!░Dawns░are░hea rtbreaking.
    Ξvery░moon░is░atrocious░and░every░sun░bitter. (ュ だ  どいロリラ威萎虞う ャイ意営縁ぇヵ)

    Quote Originally Posted by Juiz
    moon you're hurting me in ways you'll never even know. lets do that suicide, buddy.

  6. #6
    A Decent Roman's Avatar Playful Plum
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    Re: EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY - VLADIMIR PUTIN VS RASPUTIN

    Stalin won for sure.
    Formerly Cameron the Taco

    My name is Cameron, and I've been on these forums since March 2012. I'm not exceptionally forum famous, but most people know me around here. I'm a big fan of Doctor Who and Homestuck, and I enjoy just about anything sci-fi. I am also one of the major prophets of Gotye.

    My favorite battles are ERB 7, 24, and 30.


  7. #7
    Moonjik's Avatar Fine Red Wine
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    Re: EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY - VLADIMIR PUTIN VS RASPUTIN

    Thanks for the comment.
    But,░in░truth,░I░have░wept░too░much!░Dawns░are░hea rtbreaking.
    Ξvery░moon░is░atrocious░and░every░sun░bitter. (ュ だ  どいロリラ威萎虞う ャイ意営縁ぇヵ)

    Quote Originally Posted by Juiz
    moon you're hurting me in ways you'll never even know. lets do that suicide, buddy.

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