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Thread: An ERBoH.com Story

  1. #1
    Dion's Avatar Skumfuk Administrator
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    An ERBoH.com Story

    O! M! G!

    It's another ERBoH.com related story! It's not like we have a crap load of them already!
    Well, this one is different. How? First off, nobody dies in this. If everyone died, how would I keep this story going? Second, you must accept how you are being portrayed in this. I am not going to manipulate the plot I have planned out already for this story just because you want to be a badass. Third, this won't be updated on a daily basis. I'm not the kind of guy that does everything in one night, plus I like to take my time to make awesome things.

    Now, enough about what I have to say, enjoy the first chapter! Please let me know how you like it so far.

    Spoiler: 
    "A man can be as great as he wants to be. If you believe in yourself and have the courage, the determination, the dedication, the competitive drive and if you are willing to sacrifice the little things in life and pay the price for the things that are worthwhile, it can be done."
    ~ Vince Lombardi


    Chapter 1

    Registration


    Strong winds blew across the vast and empty land, carrying along the white sand that can be seen for miles on end. The sky was pure darkness, yet the world was lit up as if the sun was still being reflected by the sand. On top of a small hump of sand, a young man was struggling to get onto his feet. His mind was racing and twirling, his vision was skewed and distorted. He couldn't remember anything. Where he was, who he was, nothing.

    Once the world stopped spinning in front of him, he began vomiting out what little was in his stomach. "That a nasty taste..." The man thought to himself. He looked away from the regurgitated food and towards whatever laid in front of him. About 50 feet away, a giant wall of blackened steel stood tall. It appeared to stretch as far out as possible in either direction, and was as tall as the sky.

    "I guess that's the only place I can go to for answers..." The man thought to himself again. He attempted to start walking when his legs gave out on him and he wildly rolled down the hump. After a few moments, he recovered and continued to make his way towards the steel wall. As he got closer, he could make out a doorway on the wall. This doorway was minuscule compared to gigantic size of the steel wall.

    The man finally made it to the doorway. On one side, a monitor stuck out with a keyboard. On the other side, a video camera was scanning the horizon. The man decided to see if the monitor worked, but once he moved towards it, the video camera immediately changed its position and focused on right where he stood. The man froze for a moment, wondering if the camera was going to do anything else, but the camera did nothing except record him. He then kept walking to the monitor, which was blinking two words on the screen:

    Register / Login

    He glanced at the keyboard and noticed that it only had the ←, →, and ENTER keys. He pressed the → key so that Login was highlighted on the screen and hit ENTER. The screen went completely fuzzy and out of nowhere, a booming robotic voice echoed throughout the area, "In order to login you must be registered. Registering takes only a few moments but gives you increased capabilities. The board administrator may also grant additional permissions to registered users. Before you register please ensure you are familiar with our Terms of Use and related policies. Please ensure you read any forum rules as you navigate around the board."

    The monitor screen then flashed a few times before reverting to its previous state.

    Register / Login

    The man sighed and hit ENTER as it highlighted the Register option. The screen went fuzzy for a second time and the robotic voice boomed with more information, "By accessing the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum, you agree to be legally bound by the following terms. We may change these at any time and we’ll do our utmost in informing you, though it would be prudent to review this regularly yourself as your continued usage of the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum after changes mean you agree to be legally bound by these terms as they are updated and/or amended.

    Our forums are powered by phpBB, which is a solution released under the G.P.L. The solution only facilitates general based discussions, the G.P.L. not responsible for any side effects that may occur after the agreement to usage. For further information about phpBB, please contact the G.P.L. company in your local district.

    You agree not to discuss any abusive, obscene, vulgar, slanderous, hateful, threatening, sexually-orientated or any other material that may violate any laws be it of your country, the country where Epic Rap Battles of History Forum is located or International Law. Doing so may lead to you being immediately and permanently banned, with notification of your I.S.P. if deemed required by us. The I.S.P. address of your movements are recorded to aid in enforcing these conditions. You agree that the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum have the right to remove, alter, move or stop any subject at any time should we see fit. As a user you agree to any information you have spoken to being stored in a database. While this information will not be disclosed to any third party without your consent, neither the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum nor G.P.L. shall be held responsible for any criminal attempt that may lead to the data being compromised.

    This policy explains in detail how the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum along with its affiliated companies use any information collected during any session of usage by you.

    Your information is collected via two ways. Firstly, by browsing the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum will cause the phpBB solution to create a number of collective data, which is a small amount of nanobot technology that is inserted into your bloodstream. The first two main bots just contain a user identifier and an anonymous session identifier, automatically assigned to you by the G.P.L. A third bot will be created once you have taken part in discussions within the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum and is used to store which subjects have been read, thereby improving your user experience.

    We may also generate external use to the phpBB solution whilst staying within the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum, though these are outside resources which is intended to only reassure the progression created in the phpBB solution. The second way in which we collect your information is by what you submit to us. This can be, and is not limited to: posting as an anonymous user, registering on the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum and discussion taken place by you after registration.

    Your registration will at a bare minimum contain a uniquely identifiable name, a personal pass code used for verifying your identification and a personal, valid I.S.P address. Your information for your account at the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum is protected by data-protection laws applicable in the country that hosts us. Any information beyond your user name, your pass code, and your I.S.P address required by the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum during the registration process is either mandatory or optional, at the discretion of the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum. In all cases, you have the option of what information in your profile is publicly displayed.

    Your pass code is ciphered so that it is secure. However, it is recommended that you do not reuse the same pass code across a number of different locations. Your pass code is the means of accessing the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum, so please guard it carefully and under no circumstance will anyone affiliated with the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum, G.P.L. or another 3rd party, legitimately ask you for your pass code.

    Do you agree to these terms?"

    The screen then flashed and new options appeared:

    I agree to these terms / I do not agree to these terms

    "I doubt not agreeing will get me inside..." The man concluded. He pressed the ENTER key once more and then the entire world went black.

    "Welcome to the Epic Rap Battles of History Forum. What is your name?" A voice softly spoke to the man. Even though he couldn't tell where the voice was coming from, it felt as if someone was whispering right inside his mind.

    "I..." He paused. He struggled to remember what he used to call himself. What people used to call him. Did he know anyone? "... My name is ... SaySky." He finally resolved. It sounded familiar to him, yet a feeling tugged at him like it wasn't his real name. He figured that this would be all right for now.

    "It is nice of you to join our loving community, SaySky," The voice responded, "You will be given a personal pass code and a valid I.S.P address momentarily." All of a sudden, words appeared in front of him. He memorized them as best as he could. After a few more moments, the words faded away.

    "Please, feel free to go wherever you please. You are now a member of our community, and a new addition to our growing family. Don't be shy and remember to have fun. I suggest you visit the Introduce Yourself Plaza, in order to met people and make new friends." The voice whispered before fading away from SaySky's mind. Then, a feeling of slumber had risen upon SaySky and everything became like a dream.

    Resident Skumfuk

    Spoiler: 
    Spoiler: 

    *SEXUAL TENSION*

    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    ...I can almost smell your acumen
    Quote Originally Posted by ERBoH
    Dion the great, the first to spoketh with peter the nice, the first to modeth globally, the first to donatith
    Quote Originally Posted by Epic Doctor X
    Dion's a true ERB gambler
    Quote Originally Posted by Epic Doctor X
    Every one on this forum has a crush on Dion. No exceptions. Why? Because you're freakin' dead if you don't have a crush on Dion.
    Quote Originally Posted by Yackerz
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    I can never stop changing my username.
    Personally, Dion, Dion, and Dion were your best. It all went downhill when you chose Dion, though. Should've stuck with Dion.
    Quote Originally Posted by Chat Box
    Wumbo: KINGDOM HEARTS FUCKING THREE
    Dion: KINGDOM HEARTS FUCKING THREE
    Dr. Facilier: Dion you wont be in it
    Dion: Won't be in what?
    Umbreon: Kingdom Hearts 3 apparently
    Dion: I will be in Kingdom Hearts 3.
    Umbreon: Dion will be the final boss of Kingdom Hearts 3
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    My mom bought new soup bowls. I'm not sure how I feel about this.
    Wear them as a bra, Top.
    I can't. They're for soup, not my luscious breasts. Plus they have handles. I can't wear a bra with handles.
    Quote Originally Posted by 0 View Post
    Dion: "Do any of you culture-less shit bags even watch anime?!"
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    If we were in a 1950s high school, Dion would be like the dreamy hunk and we're all just innocent poodle skirt-wearing girls harboring a deep deep love for him
    Quote Originally Posted by Lohuydahutt
    [23-07, 03:21] Lohuydahutt: * Lohuydahutt comes in at a completely random time and becomes attracted to Dion for some inexplicable reason

    It's been 30 minutes since the Kingdom Hearts 3 announcement, and my life has turned around for the better. I stopped doing hard drugs, and my grades have improved by margins. I got off the streets and got a real job. I called my mom who I haven't talked to in years and introduced her to my girlfriend I met 29 minutes ago, Emma Watson. Upon hanging up the phone, Taco Bell arrived with my delivery and the driver gave me his winning lotto ticket. Emma and I then proceeded to cuddle while watching Sword Art Online and Attack on Titan. I am typing this from my waterbed on my Yacht in the Tropics. This has been a good day... Ah, I have to go guys... Emma just fell asleep on my washboard 12pac abs that I got from doing sit ups 5 minutes ago. Don't want to disturb her. It almost feels like a scattered dream that's like a far-off memory... a far-off memory that's like a scattered dream...

  2. #2

    Re: An ERBoH.com Story

    OMG that was amazing. And really well written Bravo Dion Dear.
    I don't know what to do anymore
    Spoiler: 

    Funny quotes v
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by Togashi Castiel-Sama
    LOL!!!!!!! Omg, that's too funny.

    "mum...dad...I'm straight"

    "WHAT?! WE MUST CURE YOU TO BE GAY!"

    lawlz.
    Quote Originally Posted by YellowNerd
    being asian is trippy as f**k


    OPEN THIS FOR AN AWWWWWWWW <3
    Spoiler: 

  3. #3

    Re: An ERBoH.com Story

    Not bad, Dion! :D
    We are. We are! We are made from broken parts!
    We are. We are! We are broken from the start!
    And our hearts. Our hearts! They were beating in the dark.
    Because we are. We are...We are built from broken parts...

  4. #4
    Dion's Avatar Skumfuk Administrator
    Join Date
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    Re: An ERBoH.com Story

    Thank you, you two. I really hope more people will read/comment on this as I add more to the story.

    Resident Skumfuk

    Spoiler: 
    Spoiler: 

    *SEXUAL TENSION*

    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    ...I can almost smell your acumen
    Quote Originally Posted by ERBoH
    Dion the great, the first to spoketh with peter the nice, the first to modeth globally, the first to donatith
    Quote Originally Posted by Epic Doctor X
    Dion's a true ERB gambler
    Quote Originally Posted by Epic Doctor X
    Every one on this forum has a crush on Dion. No exceptions. Why? Because you're freakin' dead if you don't have a crush on Dion.
    Quote Originally Posted by Yackerz
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    I can never stop changing my username.
    Personally, Dion, Dion, and Dion were your best. It all went downhill when you chose Dion, though. Should've stuck with Dion.
    Quote Originally Posted by Chat Box
    Wumbo: KINGDOM HEARTS FUCKING THREE
    Dion: KINGDOM HEARTS FUCKING THREE
    Dr. Facilier: Dion you wont be in it
    Dion: Won't be in what?
    Umbreon: Kingdom Hearts 3 apparently
    Dion: I will be in Kingdom Hearts 3.
    Umbreon: Dion will be the final boss of Kingdom Hearts 3
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    My mom bought new soup bowls. I'm not sure how I feel about this.
    Wear them as a bra, Top.
    I can't. They're for soup, not my luscious breasts. Plus they have handles. I can't wear a bra with handles.
    Quote Originally Posted by 0 View Post
    Dion: "Do any of you culture-less shit bags even watch anime?!"
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    If we were in a 1950s high school, Dion would be like the dreamy hunk and we're all just innocent poodle skirt-wearing girls harboring a deep deep love for him
    Quote Originally Posted by Lohuydahutt
    [23-07, 03:21] Lohuydahutt: * Lohuydahutt comes in at a completely random time and becomes attracted to Dion for some inexplicable reason

    It's been 30 minutes since the Kingdom Hearts 3 announcement, and my life has turned around for the better. I stopped doing hard drugs, and my grades have improved by margins. I got off the streets and got a real job. I called my mom who I haven't talked to in years and introduced her to my girlfriend I met 29 minutes ago, Emma Watson. Upon hanging up the phone, Taco Bell arrived with my delivery and the driver gave me his winning lotto ticket. Emma and I then proceeded to cuddle while watching Sword Art Online and Attack on Titan. I am typing this from my waterbed on my Yacht in the Tropics. This has been a good day... Ah, I have to go guys... Emma just fell asleep on my washboard 12pac abs that I got from doing sit ups 5 minutes ago. Don't want to disturb her. It almost feels like a scattered dream that's like a far-off memory... a far-off memory that's like a scattered dream...

  5. #5
    Uprising's Avatar Lifetime of Green
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    Re: An ERBoH.com Story

    Good job!

  6. #6

    Re: An ERBoH.com Story

    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Thank you, you two. I really hope more people will read/comment on this as I add more to the story.
    I can't wait for more <3
    I don't know what to do anymore
    Spoiler: 

    Funny quotes v
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by Togashi Castiel-Sama
    LOL!!!!!!! Omg, that's too funny.

    "mum...dad...I'm straight"

    "WHAT?! WE MUST CURE YOU TO BE GAY!"

    lawlz.
    Quote Originally Posted by YellowNerd
    being asian is trippy as f**k


    OPEN THIS FOR AN AWWWWWWWW <3
    Spoiler: 

  7. #7
    Diogee's Avatar Lifetime of Green
    Join Date
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    Re: An ERBoH.com Story

    Is SaySky based on a real person or just a generic new member?
    "And your nose. Like an unscented emergency candle for when the power goes out." - Strong Bad


  8. #8
    Uprising's Avatar Lifetime of Green
    Join Date
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    Re: An ERBoH.com Story

    Quote Originally Posted by Cubie
    Is SaySky based on a real person or just a generic new member?
    SaySky was a user made by Rob to test the global mod capabilities.

  9. #9
    Dion's Avatar Skumfuk Administrator
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    Re: An ERBoH.com Story

    Quote Originally Posted by Cubie
    Is SaySky based on a real person or just a generic new member?
    Well, he is a registered member.
    That's all I'm going to say.

    And that better be all anyone else says.

    Resident Skumfuk

    Spoiler: 
    Spoiler: 

    *SEXUAL TENSION*

    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    ...I can almost smell your acumen
    Quote Originally Posted by ERBoH
    Dion the great, the first to spoketh with peter the nice, the first to modeth globally, the first to donatith
    Quote Originally Posted by Epic Doctor X
    Dion's a true ERB gambler
    Quote Originally Posted by Epic Doctor X
    Every one on this forum has a crush on Dion. No exceptions. Why? Because you're freakin' dead if you don't have a crush on Dion.
    Quote Originally Posted by Yackerz
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    I can never stop changing my username.
    Personally, Dion, Dion, and Dion were your best. It all went downhill when you chose Dion, though. Should've stuck with Dion.
    Quote Originally Posted by Chat Box
    Wumbo: KINGDOM HEARTS FUCKING THREE
    Dion: KINGDOM HEARTS FUCKING THREE
    Dr. Facilier: Dion you wont be in it
    Dion: Won't be in what?
    Umbreon: Kingdom Hearts 3 apparently
    Dion: I will be in Kingdom Hearts 3.
    Umbreon: Dion will be the final boss of Kingdom Hearts 3
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    My mom bought new soup bowls. I'm not sure how I feel about this.
    Wear them as a bra, Top.
    I can't. They're for soup, not my luscious breasts. Plus they have handles. I can't wear a bra with handles.
    Quote Originally Posted by 0 View Post
    Dion: "Do any of you culture-less shit bags even watch anime?!"
    Quote Originally Posted by Top-Hattington
    If we were in a 1950s high school, Dion would be like the dreamy hunk and we're all just innocent poodle skirt-wearing girls harboring a deep deep love for him
    Quote Originally Posted by Lohuydahutt
    [23-07, 03:21] Lohuydahutt: * Lohuydahutt comes in at a completely random time and becomes attracted to Dion for some inexplicable reason

    It's been 30 minutes since the Kingdom Hearts 3 announcement, and my life has turned around for the better. I stopped doing hard drugs, and my grades have improved by margins. I got off the streets and got a real job. I called my mom who I haven't talked to in years and introduced her to my girlfriend I met 29 minutes ago, Emma Watson. Upon hanging up the phone, Taco Bell arrived with my delivery and the driver gave me his winning lotto ticket. Emma and I then proceeded to cuddle while watching Sword Art Online and Attack on Titan. I am typing this from my waterbed on my Yacht in the Tropics. This has been a good day... Ah, I have to go guys... Emma just fell asleep on my washboard 12pac abs that I got from doing sit ups 5 minutes ago. Don't want to disturb her. It almost feels like a scattered dream that's like a far-off memory... a far-off memory that's like a scattered dream...

  10. #10

    Re: An ERBoH.com Story

    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Cubie
    Is SaySky based on a real person or just a generic new member?
    Well, he is a registered member.
    That's all I'm going to say.

    And that better be all anyone else says.
    Hmmm. I think I get it
    I don't know what to do anymore
    Spoiler: 

    Funny quotes v
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by Togashi Castiel-Sama
    LOL!!!!!!! Omg, that's too funny.

    "mum...dad...I'm straight"

    "WHAT?! WE MUST CURE YOU TO BE GAY!"

    lawlz.
    Quote Originally Posted by YellowNerd
    being asian is trippy as f**k


    OPEN THIS FOR AN AWWWWWWWW <3
    Spoiler: 

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