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Thread: Lohuydahutt's ERB/FMERB Reviews

  1. #391
    Spookiz's Avatar
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    You should review both existing ERBoF battles ayy
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  2. #392
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by Snowhuydahutt View Post
    Well, here’s Tony Hawk vs Wayne Gretzky prob

    Da Beat

    There’s nothing particularly wrong about this beat. I mean, there’s a decent amount of variation, it sounds sporty enough I guess, and catchy enough I suppose. Frankly, it just doesn’t feel particularly memorable. It’s not a bad beat but it just kind of lacks identity for a lack of a better term. So yeah, this is difficult to rate with that in mind. Oh well, let’s roll with a

    7.5/10

    Dem Impressions

    Let’s start with Tony Hawk because why the fuck not? Costume wise, no major problems here. I mean, it’s not a perfect match of course but until Peter gets plastic surgery for every ERB he does you can’t get much better than that. As for the vocals, no major problems there. I mean, it more or less just sounds like regular Peter but he incorporates Hawk’s speech mannerisms pretty well (is mannerisms the right word? Who knowssssssss). As for Wayne Gretzky, no major problems costume wise either, not that he’s particularly challenging to pull off. As for the voice, it’s not perfect either but again, Zach captures the vocal mannerisms and stuff pretty well. So overall, other than some minor stuff the impersonations here are definitely strong.

    9.5/10

    Dem Visuals

    Well, in a similar way to Ash Ketchum vs Darwin Tony Hawk pretty much eclipsed Wayne Gretzky from a visual perspective. Hawk got a wide variety of backgrounds with some nice aesthetics while Wayne Gretzky just stayed on the ice the entire time (I mean, that’s prob realistic but still). Also, Tony Hawk’s tricks were more entertaining than Gretzky’s by a significant margin, his mannerisms were more enjoyable to watch, and the camera effects were just better as well. In comparison Gretzky just felt kind of standard. Not bad, but still. The difference here is that Tony Hawk’s visuals were not as good as Ash Ketchum’s like, at all so it appears that a lower score is in order. This match-up didn’t demand for any ridiculously over the top visuals so we didn’t get them. I’m fine with that, but I can’t justify giving too high of a score for that.

    8/10

    Wayne vs Birdman

    Well, the intro line is pretty meh all things considered, but the line after it certainly makes up for it. It’s definitely a clever reference but… I don’t know, it just feels like it’s not really making much of a point. It’s not much of a diss and it’s not much of a boast either, it’s just there. Next two lines are solid once I got the joke behind them. Nice way to basically call Gretzky a pussy. The next two lines are… kind of funny but also pretty stupid at the same time. The nose lines here are just more funny than they are clever lines but the delivery’s good enough I suppose. Next up is the “water-daughter” line pair which is also just kind of… eh. I mean, calling his daughter hot is more of a complement than a diss but whatever. After that, the Oiler Alert line is pretty good, but it’s a bit confusing. It’s like, “you’re really fucking old now” but then he referenced something that happened when Gretzky like, wasn’t old or losing his talent at all rip. Next lines have references but they mostly just feel like “just for flow” lines which as you know I’m almost never huge on. The mittens diss is goodish and the finisher is… decent. So overall, this verse has some clever lines in it but I feel like even the best lines in this verse have some noticeable flaws to them. So this verse is quite… average unfortunately. It’s a bunch of competent, solid lines but has a distinct lack of major hard hitters.

    7/10

    Damnnnn Tony

    Well, if there’s one thing I could say about this verse it’s that the first four lines are significantly weaker than Tony’s. OK wordplay followed by quite meh wordplay. Good job Zach. Fortunately, it picks up after that. The T-Hawk line’s OK and the slapshot line’s OK as well but the Flyer line’s good and the line afterwards is probably one of the cleverer Zach-style wordplay lines this verse has. The net worth lines are also pretty good wordplay-wise as well. But then we finally get a really good line with “X-Games.” The next two lines are a bit on the fact-statey side but they’re still effective disses. Also, the finisher here is significantly stronger than Tony’s. So overall, this verse has a first half that’s considerably worse than Tony’s verse and a second half that’s considerably better. I guess I’ll weigh the stronger half a bit more though.

    7.5/10

    Great One Wayne

    The first two lines are pretty good, I didn’t really get the point of the 99 Problems reference at first but now that I see the connection it’s a good line prob. The pop shove-it and swimming pool lines are a bit stronger but they’re not great or anything. So overall, solid verse but nothing that really stands out too much.

    7/10

    Sorry ‘Bout the Deke Joke

    Meh set-up line that barely sets anything up but the three periods line is probably one of the cleverest lines in the battle. The final two lines are OK I guess. I think I would like the “deke” thing better if actual dekes had any connection to “going down on your kneepads” outside of sounding like the word “dick.” So… Eh, one stand-out line with the rest being weaker than Tony’s… OK let’s go with

    7.5/10

    Now the Teams Mighty Suck

    OK, this is easily Tony Hawk’s best verse. The first two lines are good but the next two are just OK. The “can’t see the puck” line’s alright but I quite like the mighty suck lines. Even if the Ducks aren’t technically called the Mighty Ducks any more rip. Also the Vans shoes line is probably T-Hawk’s best line in the whole battle. So yeah, this verse is a lot stronger than his last two.

    8.5/10

    184, That’s Plenty of Them!

    Well, the first four lines here are pretty similar to Stevie Wonder’s four lines that ended with “but your first story was you running off with a guy” in structure. I loved those lines in that case and well… I love it in this case as well. Outside of that, the Pro Skater 3 diss is pretty good but the rest is just… eh. The second half is pretty much just “I am Great and you Suck” with limited substance but… meh, “183 of them” and “Pro Skater 3” are enough to make this his strongest verse. Just enough for him to win I suppose.

    8/10

    Overall

    This battle isn’t bad by any means, and perhaps I’m somewhat biased by the lack of characters I have any particular attachment to here. But still, this battle’s just pretty much the epitome of the average post-season 1 ERB. It’s the epitome of “this is pretty good I guess.” Nothing particularly bad about it but lacks anything that really impresses me either, which the last 3 battles all had in at least one respect. So yeah, 7.5 seem fair? Well, I don’t care what you think =P

    7.5/10

    Tony Hawk’s Best Line: Put more souls into skating than some Vans shoes!
    Tony Hawk’s Worst Line: Great One Wayne, let me say something Wayne

    Wayne Gretzky’s Best Line: (184, that’s plenty of ‘em) and I set 183 of ‘em!*
    Wayne Gretzky’s Worst Line: (I’m the greatest ever when I play hockey) But on the microphone I don’t play Hawkey!*

    Tony Hawk: 22.5/30
    Wayne Gretzky: 23/30
    Overall: 78/100 or well, 78%
    good review my main man

  3. #393
    Lohuydahutt's Avatar Senior Member
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    Welp, I’ve put this off for way too long so here’s Teddy vs Winston because wynaut

    Da Beat

    Well, as can be seen by the actual battle this beat apparently doesn’t lend itself to great flows but… I don’t really know if that’s actually a fault of the beat or just the songwriting so I’ll ignore that. Instead, let’s just look at the beat as its own thing. With that in mind… I don’t really have a problem with this beat. It fits the rappers well and it just sounds bad ass. Not the catchiest or unique thing ever ignoring that old timey feel that it has at parts but still. Either way, I like it.

    8.5/10

    Dem Impressions

    Let’s talk about Teddy first. Costume? Pretty much about as close to perfect as you could get. Not much to say there, it’s just fucking good. Voice wise? Well, they perfectly captured ERB Teddy Roosevelt’s voice but… ERB Teddy’s voice isn’t exactly what actual Teddy sounded like. Like, at all. However, I can appreciate the desire to keep the ERB Teddy voice as is to make it more entertaining. Also, it provides a nice contrast to Winston’s voice that actual Teddy voice simply couldn’t have provided. So I guess I won’t deduct as much as I normally would for that. Voice wise, Winston Churchill is a significantly better impression. Costume wise Dan Bull isn’t as close to perfect as Lloyd is to Teddy but the only real problem is the face so… whatever. Overall, not all that much to complain about in this regard tbh.

    9/10

    Dem Visuals

    To be honest, this battle is a pleasant surprise as far as visuals go. Not their most amazing work, but more than I expected from this match-up. Admittedly, most of the cool visual effects are concentrated after the first verses but even with that in mind the mannerisms are certainly entertaining enough. This isn’t the most stunning Season 5 ERB visual wise by any means but it did somewhat exceed expectations. Is it better than Tony Hawk vs Wayne Gretzky? Marginally. Do I like it more than Stevie Wonder vs Wonder Woman’s? Hmmm… not quite. I guess I’ll lean more towards…

    8/10

    WHAT’S UP BITCHES

    I’ll be honest, this verse starts out pretty weak. The “stuffed head of a Winston” line is pretty good though. The “rhymes pure” line is pretty good I guess and Rough Riding is a decent boast but it’s more funny than it is clever. Otherwise the eight lines in the first half are just decent at best. Fortunately, the weak first half is saved somewhat by the rather strong second half. The Gallipoli diss is good, the pince-nez line is pretty fucking good, the twelve step program line is great, and the closing two lines are very good. So like, the first half of this verse would get a 9 from me but the first half is more along the lines of a 6.5. Average those two and you get…. Oh 7.75. Well, I’ll give the stronger second half more weight because I’m feeling nice.

    8/10

    Oi m8, Pass the Liquor

    Wrong battle? Well, it basically started with the same line kek. The “prematurely” line right after it was decent enough though. Rhyme Minister is a decent pun and… OK, I can appreciate meta humor but this just doesn’t hold up when you take 2 seconds to think about it. “Hey, EpicLLOYD in a costume, guess what? YOU LOOK LIKE EPICLLOYD IN A COSTUME YOU BITCH HAAAAAAAA!” The next two lines aren’t that good either. The “axis of darkness-national parks” line pair basically boils down to “I was doing this really good thing while you were doing this less bad ass but also good thing.” OK, fair point, what’s the joke? Just like in Teddy’s case the second half is better, but it’s not THAT much better. The asthmatic diss is decent but chain smoking cigars doesn’t seem like the most impressive thing to boast about ever. It is funny that Winston Churchill outlived Teddy by quite a bit in spite of that tho kek. As for the remaining lines, I can definitely appreciate the attempt to integrate famous quotes into a rap but the “I’ll fight you on the beaches” reference just has awkward delivery. As far as integrating quotes into raps go Winston’s last two lines do it far better. Overall, this verse is weaker than Teddy’s in both halves and it just lacks standout lines like Teddy has, so I guess I’ll go with a…

    6/10

    World War Too Soon?

    Note: my review of this verse will take Teddy’s two lines afterwards into consideration as well. The same will go for Winston Churchill. Fair enough? OK. Any ways, as far as introductions to this verse goes the first two lines are effective as disses but I do wish they had a bit more to them. As they are right now they feel a bit too fact state-y. However, the “World War too soon?” and “Teddy’s dropping bomb” lines are splendid follow ups. As for the next two lines, the “thank God for Pearl Harbor” line is more entertaining due to its delivery than the actual content of the line, but I do kind of like it any way. However, his finishing line is just great. If I were just reviewing this verse I’d probably give it a 7.5, but I’ll grant an extra .5 for how good the “full deuce” line was. However, it does seem kind of weird to say “a bullet can’t stop the bull moose” after Churchill said “if a bullet can’t stop you.” Like, OK, Churchill agrees with you bitch. That’s an example of a line that basically needs the video to be effective. But yeah…

    8/10

    British Bulldog

    Well, this verse is certainly a step up from the last one. But spoiler: it’s not good enough to give him a win. Well, actually he’d need to score literally a 10 to even get a tie but I digress. Any ways, the British Bulldog line is certainly good. The boy scout line is also good, though I’m a bit eh on the pram line. I kind of wish the pram thing had a more specific reference beyond “oh hey British people say pram.” The Rushmore line is more funny than it is clever but I still quite like it any way. And the finisher for the verse is strong as well (well, the final line, the “the dude’s about to lose the bout to Churchill” is pretty much just for flow-type filler). However, when you factor in the two closing lines… well, they’re not bad, but it’s pretty weak by ERB closing line standards. Overall, this is a pretty good verse with a much better proportion of good lines than his previous one easily, but it’s still not as good as either of Roosevelt’s verses and it certainly isn’t as good enough to put him over the top.

    7.5/10

    Overall

    Well, this is notable for probably being the most one-sided battle this storm in my opinion, but otherwise it’s a solid battle. There’s nothing particularly exceptional about this battle outside of how great Teddy’s costume is, but still. It’s on a similar level to Tony Hawk vs Gretzky. Everything about the battle is competent, there are a few great lines here and there, but it’s nothing extraordinary. It must be noted that this battle isn’t exactly the strongest when it comes to actually listening to it. The flow isn’t great, and Teddy’s voice is kind of… abrasive. However, I don’t actually care that much about that so whatever. Just pointing it out. So yeah, unless the finale is literally the shittiest thing ever this half of Season 5 is definitely superior to the first half. So that has to count for something I guess.

    7.5/10

    Theodore Roosevelt’s Best Line: Why don’t you do-si-do on over to a twelve step program?*
    Theodore Roosevelt’s Worst Line: I mean for Christ’s sake look at that mug!

    Winston Churchill’s Best Line: But if Rushmore was a band then you’d play bass!
    Winston Churchill’s Worst Line: You look like a mix of EpicLLOYD, and a Pringles packet!*

    Theodore Roosevelt: 16/20 WINNER
    Winston Churchill: 13.5/20
    Overall: 62.5/80 or 78%

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  4. #394
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    poor churchill barely passing

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