Presidential Reviews

[Samos]

Here's my review of BBC's WWI Rap Battle (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kCEUZ4rFiac). Next is Batman vs. Sherlock.

Spoiler: 

Gavrilo Princip: The weiner schnitzel line is pretty good, but I don't really get the mustache line. It's not like Franz Joseph's mother had a mustache or anything, so that just an immature joke. Really like the "no heir" pun though, surprised ERB hasn't used that at any point yet. Unfortunately, the decline line doesn't rhyme, and the last joke is pretty much filler. 7.5/10

Emperor Franz Josef: This verse is definitely more about flow than writing, which I guess to be fair is pretty funny coming from such an old-looking guy. I found the Jeremy Clarkson reference pretty amusing though, and the puns at the end are pretty good. 7/10

Tsar Nicholas II: The first two lines just talk about similarities between the Russians and Serbians. They're not really boasts or disses, so they seem kind of pointless. Still, this verse is probably the best because of the salami line, Cossack pain train line, the revolution line and dissolution line. 8.5/10

Kaiser Wilhelm II: I'm taking off points in his first verse because the rhyming for the most part makes no sense. I like The Godfather sequel reference, and the German War Dance is kind of funny, but overall, the first verse is one of the battle's weakest verses. The second verse has the sauerkraut pie line, and it gets kind of intense at the end, but nothing too clever, and the last verse doesn't have any clever lines, just story-telling and good flow. 6.5/10

King George V: I found the difficult chap thing funny, and the ending few lines about the waves are kind of clever. In the second verse, the Billy no mates line is OK, and I thought the granny thing was somewhat funny, but not too clever. 8/10

Overall: It's fun, and I learned a lot from it. Not that cleverly written, but the production value is pretty high, and it's just fun to watch and listen to. Definitely not ERB-standards, but it's at least on the right sort of track. 7.5/10

Gavrilo Princip's Best Line: Now just like your bald head, you ain't go no heir.
Gavrilo Princip's Worst Line: Think we're scared? Here's two words for you; blow me!
Emperor Franz Josef's Best Line: I'll kick you in the Balkans and degrade Belgrade!
Emperor Franz Josef's Worst Line: Back to the story, the story of doom!
Tsar Nicholas II's Best Line: This time, my solution is your dissolution!
Tsar Nicholas II's Worst Line: So stop ya bragging, ya trollin'
Kaiser Wilhelm II's Best Line: I'll make your navy into gravy for sauerkraut pie!
Kaisen Wilhelm II's Worst Line: I can't back down now, I'll look a clown now!
King George V's Best Line: Your plans will be sunk like your floating junk, Royal Britannia rules the waves!
King George V's Worst Line: Your rhymes are a shambles, your words are a gamble, you're taking an enormous punt!

Final Results:
Gavrilo Princip: 7.5/10 (equivalent to 15/20
Emperor Franz Josef: 7/10 (equivalent to 16/20)
Tsar Nicholas II: 8.5/10 (equivalent to 17/20)
Kaiser Wilhelm II: 6.5/10 (equivalent to 13/20)
King George V: 8/10 (equivalent to 16/20)

Total Score: 45/60 (equivalent to 37.5/50)

[Dion]

Hey Sam, review my battles.

[Samos]

Hey Sam, review my battles.

OK.

Spoiler: 

Batman-Round 1: The first half of the verse doesn't attempt any real jokes, it's just sort of platitudey. I do like the sidekick comparison and the references to Moriarty and Robert Downey Jr., even if there are better RDJ jokes that could've been made. 7.5/10

Sherlock Holmes-Round 1: There's a nice little deduction thing at the beginning. ERB ultimately wound up doing something similar in their first Sherlock verse, so I guess you should be proud that you came up with that idea first. The pompous housewife and sex life lines are funny, even if not too clever. The elementary line is kind of obvious, but it could be worse, and the last line is awesome. 8/10

Batman-Round 2: The forensic science line isn't really a joke, but I really like the Arkham Asylum line. The third line isn't too brilliant, but it's at least a reference, while the last line is a bit filler-y. Probably still better than the first verse though. 8/10

Sherlock Holmes-Round 2: The primitive line is a pretty good line, even if it isn't really a reference, while the money line isn't really that much of a joke. I think the inevitable line is just barely good enough to let Sherlock keep the win. 8/10

Overall: There are definitely a few laughs in here, and there aren't really any lines that I disliked, but at the same time not much really stands out as superb in this battle. You definitely have enough references here for a great battle, but a few of jokes seem a bit too simple. Maybe a few more puns and a bit more wordplay would help here. 8/10

Batman's Best Line: I've seen better work done in Arkham Asylum!
Batman's Worst Line: Criminals run away in fear once I'm in their sight.
Sherlock Holmes' Best Line: One more thing, the guys I catch don't keep coming back!
Sherlock Holmes' Worst Line: Your money can't surpass my mind so incredible.

Final Results:
Batman: 15.5/20
Sherlock Holmes: 16/20

Total Score: 39.5/50

[Dion]

Sam, review my battle.

[Samos]

Sam, review my battle.

OK.

Spoiler: 

Iron Man: The first line isn't that clever, it kind of just sets up the battle, while the Justice League line is pretty great. The Robin line is kind of obvious, but it works. None of the sex jokes are that clever until the iron rod line, which I thought was great, and the emotions things created a pretty funny mental image. I liked the Adam West reference, and the Wayne Enterprises line is pretty good. The Bane line seems a bit simple, probably could've been better jokes made about that, and the last two lines aren't really references. 15.5/20

Batman: The first line is kind of just filler, but then the next 5 lines are all really, really clever references. The Iron F*ggot line seems kind of lame, unless there's some reference I'm missing, but the Inspector Gadget reference is pretty funny. I like the HAMMER line, and then the next few lines seem more fact-statey than joking. Last line is excellent though. 18/20

Overall: Iron Man's lines have sort of the same flaws your last battle had, while Batman's lines fix pretty much every problem I had with the first one. The battle still has a few lines that reference and don't make any jokes, but I definitely found this a step up from the last one. 8.5/10

Iron Man's Best Line: There is no Justice in a League that's so keen to dissemble!
Iron Man's Worst Line: You fail at being a superhero and at being a great detective.
Batman's Best Line: The only love you can manage is when your face kisses the pavement!
Batman's Worst Line: I have a f*cking Batmobile, you're looking like the Iron F*ggot.

Final Results:
Iron Man: 15.5/20
Batman: 18/20

Total Score: 42/50

[PortlyLlama80]

Oh, my battle should be next.

[Samos]

Here's my review of PortlyLlama80's Otto von Bismarck vs. Wilhelm II (http://www.erboh.com/forum/showthrea...l=1#post370667). Next is Sceptile vs. Swampert.

Spoiler: 

Otto von Bismarck-Round 1: I'm glad you referenced the blood and iron thing, but there are better jokes you could've made about it. The Willhelm the Last line is pretty great. The insane line isn't that much of a reference, the artillery shells is good but kind of done-before, and the test line is more fact-statey than clever. A lot of these lines reference things that could make for clever jokes, but instead they're just mentioned and not joked about. I like the stab in the back line and the heat line, but the verse could still be better. 7.5/10

Wilhelm II-Round 1: There aren't really any good references until the paved road line. From that line on, the verse really picks up. I really like the Kulterkampf line, April Fools line and Imperial Decree line. It definitely makes up for the average beginning. 8.5/10

Otto von Bismarck-Round 2: I actually saw the Willy no mates line (and the Willhelm the Great line for that matter) before in this battle: http://youtu.be/kCEUZ4rFiac?t=3m34s I'm not sure if that was intentional or not, but it's important to be careful to avoid that kind of thing. As for the rest of the verse, the Jurassic Park 3 reference is kind of random but funny, the bow down line is good and the Doom line is nice. I do have a few problems with the filler lines in this verse. If there's a line that says "I don't know how to explain this" in the reference guide, it means that you should take it out. 8/10

Willhelm II-Round 2: A few annoying filler lines in here that could really be used against anyone, but it picks up near the end. There could've been a better new course line, but I like the rust line and the Berlin to Istanbul line is great. Not that great, but good enough for Wilhelm to keep the win. 7.5/10

Overall: All things considered, the battle has a lot of pretty smart references and some pretty funny jokes. But some lines seem pretty rushed, and they could be used against anyone. You have to at least try to make every line something you're proud of. So while I liked this battle, take your time in the future, and make every line as important any any other line. 8/10

Otto von Bismarck's Best LineWilhelm the Second? More like Wilhelm the Last.
Otto von Bismarck's Worst Line: You have about as much intelligence as a bi-polar tree
Willhelm II's Best Line: From Berlin to Istanbul, You'll find nowhere to run and no place to hide.
Wilhelm II's Worst Line: You little prince punk. this is about to really get serious.

Final Results:
Otto von Bismarck: 15.5/20
Wilhelm II: 16/20

Total Score: 39.5/50

[Katz]

AW SHIET THE HYPE IS RIPE

[laithXRLD555]

Can you review my Bruce Banner vs. Dr. Jekyll please.
http://www.erboh.com/forum/showthrea...763#post371763

[Katz]

Also when you get the time can you review Gyarados vs Milotic? (Same thread)