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Thread: Presidential Reviews

  1. #871
    GonadTheNomad's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
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    Quote Originally Posted by HeroSamuel View Post
    Here's my review of Uprising vs. Brad. Next is Beastness vs. PolarBore.
    Spoiler: 
    Brad-Round 1: The vocabulary line is a pretty nice line, and so is the line that follows it. I was a bit disappointed by the Wisconsin line, because there are so many jokes you could’ve made about it, and that one wasn’t as good as it could’ve been. 8/10

    Uprising-Round 1: The sig line is nice, just like the sig joke Brad made. My main problem with this verse is a problem that lots of forumer battles have, there are a lot of lines that seems unrelated to either rapper. 7/10

    Brad-Round 2: This verse isn’t that good, that is, until the last line. Sure, it’s not as clever as it could’ve been, but it is a really brutal insult, and it saves the battle for Brad in my opinion. 7.5/10

    Uprising-Round 2: The only good line in this verse is the Breaking Bad line, but that’s OK, because of the ‘’flow’‘. Flow is pretty difficult to pull off in writing, but if you can make it so that readers instantly hear the flow in their head and they’re impressed, then you’ve done well. 7.5/10

    Overall: This battle was kind of in the middle in terms of ranking the TDFE challenge 1 battles. It had a lot of lines that didn’t have a relation to either rapper, but at the same time, it does have some very impressive lines. 7.5/10

    Final Results:
    Brad: 15.5/20
    Uprising: 14.5/20

    Total Score: 37.5/50
    i can ahz link? :3
    Spoiler: 

    Act uqa wa it
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by “Adonis”
    Act
    uqa
    wa
    it
    Gonad has no nads pass it on!!!!11!

  2. #872

    HeroSamuel reviews

    I'm requesting my Grumpy Cat VS Garfield battle

    The battle is in the spoiler...


    Spoiler: 
    Grumpy Cat:

    I find your show un-amusing, your to lazy to fight.
    Your just another feline who licks his own shite.
    You like to annoy the hec out of humans, make un-needed remarks.
    At least i'm just a taken image who doesn't even need to talk
    I'm used on memes around on different backdrops people find me clever.
    So great Lolcats is now fucking me forever.
    Your mouth is full of shit, I can address you as a phonie.
    I will be handing your arse, that's if it wasn't having anal with Odie.

    Garfield:

    Wipe that moody face, You drama queen clown.
    Before i hand it back at ya and send your ratings all right down.
    How can you fight a fat cat, who's still got the amazing moves.
    With my flawless victory's so high i dont need you to approve.
    I got a fucking awesome owner and his name starts with John.
    When it comes down to you and me, The rap switch is flicked to on.
    Purr the hell away, Before I start scratching a defeat.
    You can only sit there in picture form, How do we know if you can land on 2 feet?

    Grumpy Cat:

    I detect bullshit leaking, my rhymes will perfectly harm ya.
    You only get satisfaction when you smell the smell of lasagna.
    I make a whole profit, Cat pictures with me is next to girls with boobies.
    All you got is a litter box and 2 unsuccessful movies.
    I'm no bad cat, all i do is talk what i speak.
    Give it all up, your cat days are nearly at there peak.
    I spit on your image from my image, I'm more better because i'm more wise.
    People call you lazy because you don't do any damn exercise.

    Garfield:

    I have printed all your images and burnt every last copy.
    By the end off this I'll make you be regrettin sorry.
    You came after me, I was the original beast.
    You can show some respect for me at least.
    Held a Guinness world record of a syndicated comic strip.
    Too bad ass i could eat a whole can of cat-nip.
    You beating me? Like that will ever happen?
    I could take a single person on like i did to Happy Chapman...

  3. #873
    Can you review this as well when you get the chance?

    Spoiler: 

    (Also, since this was originally a You vs the Person Above battle, this is EDX's verse that my first verse in this battle was a reply to, don't review this one: )

    Spoiler: 
    *A strong fog suddenly covers everything. Out of nowhere, a black silhouette rises. The fog slowly clears, revealing.. me*

    "....I'm back"

    Epic Doctor X:
    The Doctor's back in the house, cover your ears and eyes, bitches!
    I'll leave you people brutally mauled and viciously beaten to death in the ditches!
    I return to this rap arena loaded with more anger than Hitlah!
    Call me a lyrical butcher, one more word, and I'll split ya!
    What the fuck, The Steam Punk? Your "Steam" stunk, stop the flapping!
    Born in the wrong century? Hell yeah, judging by your rapping!
    I'll leave you with that, so I can snap some more necks,
    Thank you for your time, Best Regards, EDX.


    (And this is what I want reviewed.)

    EPIC RAP BATTLES OF PERSONAL INTEREST!!!!
    EPIC DOCTOR X!
    VS!!
    MEEEEEEWWW!
    BEGIN!!

    Mew:
    Dude, your hubby's a Brad Wolf. At least I can keep my bitch tamed!
    Quit with the drama, this ain't theatre. No special effect's with my rapping flame.
    You call yourself a lyrical butcher, but all of us really know what that means.
    You beat your meat raw before serving it to your parents and siblings!
    "You're back? I didn't even notice you left" is what all these unoriginals would say,
    but I hate to lie to a doctor, so I admit once you were gone I started to celebrate!
    Back when this cheap site had a plain black layout, you were Rob's ERB cartel.
    Snooping around behind the scenes, getting your 'fill' of Epic Rap Battle personnel.
    I guess to be a Swedish doc you need to play a glitchy bitchy Tupac, to get your doctorate.
    Now when the forum thinks of an outcast, they'll think of you, Mr. 'Epic' Doctor X!

    Epic Doctor X:
    Are you kidding me? Just after a few hours has passed,
    A wild asshole appears and tries to shove lies up my ass!
    Why drag Brad into this? I mean, I'm married to a predator,
    While all you have is a cat.. Wouldn't call that a competitor.
    I played a glitchy Tupac, but what the hell are you known for?
    Changing your name so much no one knows who you are anymore?
    You've got nothing against me, write down that in your poké-dex,
    Thank you for your time, Best Regards, EDX.

    Mew:
    I'll disregard your regards, better be on your guard, EN GARDE!
    I'll scalpel you into MY territory, and rip ya apart like Fake Pokemon cards.
    You'll need a doctor, Doctor, because I'm playing a Player.
    Get your gas mask ready cuz my dis spits venomous vapor!
    At least I embrace change, while you're in a cardboard box begging for more.
    You've jacked off so much, even Brad has a pussy bluer than yours!
    You're Sweden's #1 talentless psycho, even when we put you next to Pewds.
    And I've scorched Caterpie with more bite than you!

    Epic Doctor X:
    Are you actually trying to beat the Doctor X with word playin'?
    That's the style I used that left Steam Punk abused, so start prayin'!
    When we're through, Mew, you will be lying 6 feet deeper down,
    I'm subconsciously beatin' your ass, call me Lavender Town!
    You think you're greater than me, well I'm about to make it awkward,
    You left Cleverbot confused - using the line of a doctor!
    Don't even to beat me with another verse, you'll never succeed.
    Just show me the white flag, bitch - You got beaten by a swede.

    WHO WON!?
    PROBABLY WON'T BE ONE NEXT!
    SO NO ONE DECIDES!
    EPIC RAP BATTLES OF PERSONAL INTEREST!!!!
    Watch Magical Girl Raising Project. Just do it.

  4. #874
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
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    Here's my review of PolarBore vs. Beastness. Next is The Fourth Gunnut and 3 vs. Pool and Lawl.
    Spoiler: 
    Beastness-Round 1: There are 2 pretty good lines near the beginning, the redux line and the party line. The rest of the verse isn’t too impressive, and the references aren’t all that clever. 7.5/10

    PolarBore-Round 1: This verse focuses more on really insulting lines than really clever lines, which is OK, it works. The MaryDoodles line is good, the line that follows is OK and the last line is good. 8/10

    Beastness-Round 2: The only really decent line is the last line, and even that isn’t as good as it could be. I would say this verse is worse than the first verse of the battle, but not by too much. 7/10

    PolarBore-Round 2: The Grown Ups 2 line is pretty nice, the Spartica line is OK and the last line, while good, seems a bit unrelated to either rapper. This is just enough to give UnicornKevin the win. 7.5/10

    Overall: It seems like this battle wasn’t really as long as any of the other TDFE battles, and I’m not sure why. It definitely wasn’t the best of the TDFE battles, but it was still a fun battle to read. 7.5/10

    Final Results:
    Beastness: 14.5/20
    PolarBore: 15.5/20

    Total Score: 37.5/50

    http://www.erboh.com/forum/showthrea...l=1#post329500

    If you want me to review something of yours, click me.
    Spoiler: 


    We're all humans, we all make mistakes, but try to always keep the site rules in mind..

    Things on here I found funny:
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambama
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    wumbo write anotherfanfic now
    have nice peter come in
    "it's nice peter bitches"
    ""and i'm going to give you all my NICE PETER"
    and then peter visits the forum
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by zyroda View Post
    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
    Quote Originally Posted by TDFE Confessional
    Quote Originally Posted by GonadtheNomad
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    SENT
    lies
    i never lie
    Honest Wumbabe
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperRapz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocket
    Gogos are not 4 year old toys, they're a choking hazard.
    You Know What Else Is A Choking Hazard? My Penis. So you Better Stop Sucking On it So hard, Four Year Old. Make A New Thread For your Spam, You Stupid Bitch. We Try To have Fun Here. And Don't Jump On me About MLP, You Stupid little Fuck. Like YN Said, Go Get Tested Or Some Shit. I'm Tired Of Putting Up With You. Pie Licking Bitch, Go Shove A Pickle up Your Ass. Better Yet, A Banana.
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambaba
    http://aattp.org/conservative-christian-rewrote-harry-potter-so-her-kids-wont-turn-into-witches/
    I'm not reading past the title

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Luther King, Jr.
    Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.

  5. #875
    Poles's Avatar Senior Member
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    I know that it's not really a serious battle, but it would be hilarious if you reviewed my Goste Rida vs Ominom battle. It was meant to be terrible, by the way.
    Link: http://www.erboh.com/forum/showthrea...RIDA-VS-OMINOM

  6. #876
    Samos's Avatar Super Moderator
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    Here's my review of The Fourth Gunnut and 3 vs. Pool and Lawl. Next is Pit vs. Percy Jackson.
    Spoiler: 
    3: Some of the lines seem to generic and not very clever, like the pedophiles line. That being said, it does have some pretty good lines to save the verse, such as the 3 Chainz line. 7/10

    The Fourth Gunnut: I’m not sure if you guys knew this, but I love puns in rap battles, and the ‘’Fourth’‘ pun is no exception. The drowning line and the verbal gunshots line make this verse the better verse on the team. 8/10

    Pool: The disses towards Gunnut aren’t that impressive, but the ones towards 3 are pretty clever, especially the Num Lock line. The link also is a pretty nice touch, and makes the verse more unique. 8/10

    Lawlzor: This verse is my favorite verse of the battle, the best lines being the first line, the contusion line, the tangerine line and the last line. Not all of the lines are great, some of them seem a bit pointless, but that doesn’t prevent it from being the best. 8.5/10

    Overall: I haven’t read the other battles in this tournament, but maybe I should, because this was pretty enjoyable. I’ve always been surprised by how forumers are able to find so many jokes to make about each other. 8/10

    Final Results:
    Team 3/4ths: 15/20
    Pool and Lawlzor: 16.5/20

    Total Score: 39.5/50

    http://www.erboh.com/forum/showthrea...l=1#post328898
    Last edited by Samos; 09-01-2013 at 08:42 PM.

    If you want me to review something of yours, click me.
    Spoiler: 


    We're all humans, we all make mistakes, but try to always keep the site rules in mind..

    Things on here I found funny:
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambama
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    wumbo write anotherfanfic now
    have nice peter come in
    "it's nice peter bitches"
    ""and i'm going to give you all my NICE PETER"
    and then peter visits the forum
    Quote Originally Posted by Dion
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by zyroda View Post
    there was a girl though once she told me she loved me she used to tell me that all the time
    she had this really adorable dog
    it was a boxer and it used to bark really loudly and throw howls in the night and never shut up and it kept her up and night before the big final exam

    and i just wanted her to do well on her exam so i shot the dog
    and all of a sudden im a bad guy

    and you don't love me anymore

    i'm so sorry i guess i never ever do a damn thing right

    everybody thinks i'm gonna cause problems

    nobody wants me with them cause they think i'm gonna do all this weird stuff that's gonna cause problems
    Quote Originally Posted by TDFE Confessional
    Quote Originally Posted by GonadtheNomad
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Wumbo
    SENT
    lies
    i never lie
    Honest Wumbabe
    Quote Originally Posted by SuperRapz
    Quote Originally Posted by Rocket
    Gogos are not 4 year old toys, they're a choking hazard.
    You Know What Else Is A Choking Hazard? My Penis. So you Better Stop Sucking On it So hard, Four Year Old. Make A New Thread For your Spam, You Stupid Bitch. We Try To have Fun Here. And Don't Jump On me About MLP, You Stupid little Fuck. Like YN Said, Go Get Tested Or Some Shit. I'm Tired Of Putting Up With You. Pie Licking Bitch, Go Shove A Pickle up Your Ass. Better Yet, A Banana.
    Quote Originally Posted by PolarBore
    Quote Originally Posted by Sambaba
    http://aattp.org/conservative-christian-rewrote-harry-potter-so-her-kids-wont-turn-into-witches/
    I'm not reading past the title

    Quote Originally Posted by Martin Luther King, Jr.
    Let no man pull you low enough to hate him.

  7. #877
    GonadTheNomad's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
    Join Date
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    Quote Originally Posted by HeroSamuel View Post
    The Fourth Gunnut: I’m not sure if you guys knew this, but I love puns in rap battles, and the ‘’Fourth’‘ pun is no exception. The drowning line and the verbal gunshots line make this verse the better verse on the team. 8/10
    Thx. :3
    Spoiler: 

    Act uqa wa it
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by “Adonis”
    Act
    uqa
    wa
    it
    Gonad has no nads pass it on!!!!11!

  8. #878
    I was quite fond of the Num Lock line myself.
    I am the first and ONLY WWERBOH.COM champion.
    Spoiler: 


  9. #879
    GonadTheNomad's Avatar Bon Vivant of Violet
    Join Date
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    THERE WAS A NUM LOCK LINE? :O
    Spoiler: 

    Act uqa wa it
    Spoiler: 
    Quote Originally Posted by “Adonis”
    Act
    uqa
    wa
    it
    Gonad has no nads pass it on!!!!11!

  10. #880
    Quote Originally Posted by The Fourth Gunnut View Post
    THERE WAS A NUM LOCK LINE? :O
    Re-read the battle, the middle of my verse.
    I am the first and ONLY WWERBOH.COM champion.
    Spoiler: 


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